Five Letters on Sunday

3. The Third Letter

            After the movie, Lukas was left wondering if high school really was that way for girls in America.  He’d loved the movie, but wasn’t very fond of the idea that people may have really acted that way in other places.  The girls at his school were pretty friendly, from what he’d experienced.  Sure, every school had a mean girl, but he avoided those types with a passion.  Instead, he spent more time talking with his friend Ashley.  She was an awesome friend who took great interest in his relationship with Chandler.  She knew, deep down, that Lukas had a crush, but she wasn’t going to say anything about it.  She didn’t want to push him to do something he wasn’t ready for.

            Lukas headed back upstairs, hoping he had enough time before his mother returned home.  She was out shopping for Christmas presents for him and his cousins.  They were going over to his Aunt Marilyn’s house for the holidays, and they wanted to be prepared for the gift exchanging.  The boy closed the door and picked up the third letter from his desk.  Right from the beginning, he knew something was wrong.

Dear Luk,

 

            Emma found where I kept all of your letters and she’s pissed.  I don’t know what she’s so mad about, but she is.  I hate when she gets this way.  I’d like to think that she’s jealous because we talk so much, but I don’t think that’s it.  She actually told me that if I liked you so much, then I should just date you and stop leading her on.  We’ve been arguing a lot more recently, and I think she’s ready to break it off with me.  I don’t want that to happen at all.  I care about her, and I want to be with her.  I was rereading the note you sent me today, and I agree with you.  We should get on Skype or something.  I don’t even have a clue what you look like.  Shit.  She’s here.

            We’re done.  She broke up with me.

            Lukas, I don’t know what to do…

            She… she told me that I was a fag and that I never should have wasted her time.  She told me that she wished she’d never wasted time being in a relationship with me.  But I’m not gay.  I’ve never sat there and thought about anyone other than her.  How could she think that we were more than just pen pals?  I didn’t tell you that part, did I?  Well, she said that I had feelings for you that everyone could see.  She called you a fag too.  I’m so sorry, Lukas.  I know that you’re not like that, and I’m not like that, but shit.  I feel like crying.  I am crying.  She was everything I liked in a person.  She was funny and smart and cute and just everything I could have ever wanted.

            But she was also rude.  She was cold.  She could be a bitch at times.  I didn’t like that part.  Why am I still crying?  Lukas, I don’t know what to do.  I feel like my heart is being ripped out of my chest and torn to shreds.  It’s like she stabbed me in the stomach and left me bleeding and crying on the ground.  I don’t know what to do other than wait.  What am I waiting for?  I don’t know.  I need your help.  Please, tell me what to do, Luk.  Please.  Please get this letter, please.  Lukas, I need you to get this letter.  You’re the only person who doesn’t think less of me for no reason.  You were always my best friend.  I wish you were here right now.  Here in America, here with me.  Here.  But not even that is possible.

I’m so lost.

What did I ever do to deserve this?

            Emma hates me.  Do you hate me?

            You don’t hate me, do you?  Please don’t hate me.  Please don’t.

 

                        -Chan

 

            Lukas wiped the tears from his face, the ink on the paper smeared with the same liquid.  He hated a part of himself.  He should have tried harder to get these letters.  He wanted to fix what was happening to Chandler.  He wanted to fix everything.  Lukas sat down in the desk chair and cried for a few moments.  This wasn’t Chandler’s fault at all.  Emma was the heartless girl that had hurt his best friend.  Emma was the reason behind all of the pain, and there was nothing either boy could do to stop the hurt.