Hold Me While You Wait

29|everything about you makes me sentimental

everything about you makes me sentimental

Everything in the lake house sparked a memory in Elis. Even when she walked past the newly painted walls of the renovated house, still the memories of the past remained with her. They wouldn't be so easily erased, and Elis knew that. Even on that slightly gloomy day, when the sky held a slight shade of gray, as the bright summer season slowly began to wear down, Elis still felt her nagging grief. Though the happiness she discovered did it's best to wear it down, it only proved to be unweaving, and Elis didn't know if there was ever going to be a time when she didn't feel anymore of it.

The thought only expanded itself more when she twisted the doorknob, stepping into the untouched bedroom of her brother. It looked so separated from the rest of the house, like it wasn't a part of it at all. The dust on the counters showed that even her mother never set foot in it. The sports trophies in the chest across the room was covered by a layer of dust that filled the air, which claimed the glisten, almost mocking them of what they used to look like. How ecstatic Bryson was whenever he glanced at them, how everything else had gone into a dirty plunge hole since the day her worst nightmare came to live.

"I don't remember much about that day," Elis said, closing her eyes as she lied on her bed, not needing to open her eyes to see if the ginger was listening, because she knew she was. Gray would always be there even just to listen. "Or maybe that's a lie. Maybe that's what I wish was true... That I didn't remember anything at all."

But it wasn't just that, not when Elis walked further into Bryson's room, trailing her fingertips over the bed that was since made by him. Not when she set her eyes on the bedside counters and their family pictures filled her vision once again. Not when she smelled his shirt and his scent overwhelmed her all over again. Not when that moment was happening, as if coming into his room for the first time in three years would go by lightly.

"The truth's that I remember everything. I remember it all, even his mere scent just that day I saw him alive for the last time," Elis continued, her mind running wild, but she forced to remain content. Gray sat beside her, the ginger girl stroking her arm mindlessly, which was what helped Elis remain clam.

But that wasn't what she could be when she further opened Bryson's closet, finding his clothes still neatly packed inside. Everything in the room would be perfect, everything indeed, for as long as someone had the courage to step in and wipe off the dust, to open the windows and see his room one more time...

But Gray kept stroking Elis's arm as the curly haired girl thought back to three years ago. "He was very happy that day because our parents allowed him to go to a party with one of his friends. I didn't want to know much about the party at that time since I wasn't very interested. But I should've wanted to know more, because maybe I would've stopped him from going there... Or maybe I could've went with him to make sure he didn't get in a car and drive drunk. Maybe it could've stopped the whole thing... That he crashed into a pole and died alone... In an empty street with nobody to help him."

Contradictory to her words, Elis felt like she blamed him more than she blamed herself. But maybe that was hypocritical thinking and nobody should be blamed at all, but Elis felt so deeply that it was Bryson's mistake. She knew that it was his mistake... That he should've known better than to be careless on that day.

However, all the bitter thoughts couldn't even be found when Elis grabbed one of the photos on the counter, and held it close against her chest, closing her eyes to imagine only the good things.

Which was the same tranquility as when she was with Gray, the ginger girl tentatively listening to Elis without saying anything else between her words.

"But I'm not angry with him anymore," Elis cooed, opening her eyes to meet Gray's hazel irises. "I've learned to accept, I guess, and I never thought I'd ever say this so meaningfully."

"So these next six days," Elis continued, her sigh shaky as she sat up to hold Gray by her hands, looking lovingly at the girl who's taken over her so tremendously. "I want to spend these next six days with you... Not thinking of Bryson, not thinking of anything else. Just me and you."

Acknowledging only the positivity, Gray smiled, leaning over to wrap her arms around Elis's shoulders.

"I'll spend them all with you Elis," Gray said, both girls falling out of thoughts with how the next six days were Elis's last ones in the lake house, but rather how they would spend each and every one of them with only their to love to live.

"I have a feeling they'll be the best ones yet. So far this summer has been the most wonderful time of my life." Gray breathed, her hand beginning to weave through Elis's curly hair. Elis smiled as she thought of everything she wished to do next.

"I want to kiss you in the lake, not caring if anyone's watching. I want to hold you all throughout the night, not caring if someone wants you back home. I want to hold your hand and take long walks with you. I want to kiss you on top of the hills, and hug you close in the middle of a crowd at the night bar... I want everyone to know just how I'm in love with you."

Gray smiled, feeling her cheeks warming up. "If this was ever a tale told, it would be my favorite."

Elis chuckled as she secured her arms around Gray's waist. "You sure Shakespeare never wrote about this kind of love?"

"Nope. I don't think he ever got close to this."

"Really? No legendary writer... None?"

Gray shook her head again, amused by Elis's playfulness and her smile, which was one of the best things she's ever witnessed.

And Elis grinned, closing the distance to finally kiss the ginger girl in front of her.

"This is the best reality I've ever lived," the curly haired girl whispered as she kissed her once again. And Gray smiled because it was the same for her too.