Free as a Jailbird

Chapter 28

Nick and I pick up take-out on our way home. We discover that we both can't get enough of dumplings and I'm grateful and somewhat bashful when he pays. I don't think he knows exactly how poor I really am. I decide to save that conversation for later.

It's about two o'clock in the afternoon. Maria is at work and Kayla is at school. When I ask why he clocked off so early, he says they made some staff cuts this week. He shrugs when I feel guilty for not paying for food.

I really need a shower – even though I only tell him half the truth, Nick still has his suspicions about my 'self-defense training' – and Nick is happy to lend me a shirt and towel. I usually enjoy my showers but I hurriedly wash myself over and inspect all the places where hair might be indecently long. When I'm satisfied, I step out of the shower, excited to spend time with him. So excited that I accidentally slip on the bath mat after wrapping the towel hastily around me and fall back into the shower with a painful squeal.

Nick comes running. I am so sore from training that I literally can't get up. The door bursts open and he stands there, sweatpants on and a shirt in his hands. He must've been halfway through changing. His body is amazing. I never pictured him naked – which is a weird thing to do anyway unless you're that kind of person – but I certainly am now. He is far more sculptured than I expected. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen anything more beautiful than his muscular chest, broad upper body and ... God, those arms. I'm so distracted that I don't see the look of lust in his eyes until I feel the pain of the hard bathtub floor burst through my numbness.

I stare up at him and find myself pouting. Yep, I pout at him. Like a twelve-year-old.

He smiles, his head tipping to the side and his shoulders shaking with laughter.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

"Are you going to help me up, jackass?"

Laughing, he leans over the bath and takes my hand and pulls me to my feet. I hold the towel against myself. His hand remains in mine even after I'm safely on solid ground. I can see my reflection in the foggy mirror, my hair pulled up in a messy bun on top of my head, strands of wet hair sticking to my collar bone. He looks into my eyes and I feel so stuck, as if I'm under some kind of spell. It sounds stupid but I can't move. I want him to kiss me again like he did in the interrogation room. I want him to kiss me gently. I want him to take his hands and drag them over every inch of my body. I am so aroused that I feel my cheeks redden and my entire body tingle.

Achingly slow, Nick traces his hand up my arm and along the skin of my neck to reach my jawline. I feel goosebumps litter the skin after his touch is gone. He rests his hand against my cheek and reaches down to kiss the other side. His lips glide over the damp skin.

"Jess ..." he whispers.

I go weak at the sound of my name.

"Yeah?" I drop my hands away from the loose towel and spread them over his back, running them through the creased contours of his muscles.

"Are you still hungry?"

"That ... depends on what you're talking about," I breathe and my breath hitches in my throat as he sucks on my neck.

I'm so distracted by his tender touch that I don't feel him tug on my towel. Normally I'd be a bit more careful of how I lose my clothes, but my subconscious doesn't seem to care about privacy and by the time I'm aware that I'm fully naked, I instantly forget. The feel of Nick's roaming hands and lips takes me to a different place. He is gentle with the areas I'm scarred and bruised but the more he travels down, the more his hands get confident. I bury my fingers in his hair and grip it tightly.

"Nick?"

He stops, stands up straight and looks at me with anxious eyes. Maybe he thinks he's gone too far.

I merely clasp his face in my hands and smile. "I don't think it's fair that I'm the only one without clothes on."

He grins. In two seconds flat, his pants and his underwear are on the floor, his arms are wrapped around my body and he's carrying me down the corridor to his bedroom. I pay no attention to what it looks like; I only see the hunger in his gaze as he drops me on the bed.

I have only had sex with two men; the first was a boy named Brodie. We were fifteen, he'd just joined the crew I was riding with and we were hooking up. We were young and we thought that if we had sex we'd be accepted in the group. I remember part of the reason being because I wanted to prove to Todd that I wasn't a kid and I was old enough to be with him. He knew all along that wasn't going to work.

The second time was a rape, and not at all pleasurable. My experience of sex so far has been far less than satisfying.

But the way that Nick touches me, the way he holds me ... it makes me forget it all. It makes it hard to believe I was ever mistreated by men. There are flashes of horrible memories that try to push their way through, but then Nick brushes his lips against my lips and caresses me gently and whispers in my ear how great it feels and I forget.

I just forget. And I feel like I might someday soon fall in love with him.