Clover Hawkings and the Triwizard Tournament

30. Scarlet's Little Therapy Session

disclaimer: friends are not and should not be your therapist. they are there to talk with you and support you, but will not replace a licensed phycologist or therapist. if you find yourself unhappy, stressed, and venting to your friends too much, a real therapist can help you. 

Life continued to pass in the bland blur it was.

Ice sank its cold claws on the castle.

Time brought the dread of all of Hogwarts- the Yule Ball. Girls giggled. Boys sweat. It was impossible to pass in the hallways without hearing about the food, the robes, who was going with whom.

If the rumors were to believed, Dumbledore was going with the bartender Madam Rosmerta, Snape was sweet on Trelawney (?) a vampire was invited- and as for the matter of Harry Potter?

Twenty-seven different girls swore on their life he was going with them.

Scarlet and Alura had quietly filled me in on the events for the First Task- dragons, Harry Potter, whup-dee-dee, Golden Egg, et cetera. It's a miracle that no one has died yet- one I am positive won't last.

Then, Scarlet and Alura, just as quietly, had snuck off. I guess they really didn't want to get in between Artemis and me.

But that wasn't my concern- the Tournament was. (Or so I told myself.)

Don't they know what happens?

Your father dies, and then your mother switches from one crazy organization to the next, and then your aunt-

I shut down. The thought, the emotions, the tears, everything, and desperately look for something else to focus on. I bite down on my lip, a sense of relief flowing through me when I feel the skin break.

"Stop it," a sharp voice said next to me. I turn to see Scarlet, looking uncharacteristically stern.

"Stop what?" I said innocently.

"Find a better destructive outlet," she brushed her red hair out of her eyes.

I looked at the floor. I had been aimless wandering the halls- escaping from my roommates or thoughts, I don't know- when the redhead had joined me.

There was an awkward silence. "Should I get bangs?" Scarlet asked, voice much lighter.

"Sure," I shrugged.

"Are you staying over the break?" she tries again.

"No."

"Why not?"

I shrug again, not thinking of the hurt in Artemis's eyes. I think we're headed towards the Ravenclaw Tower. "What's the point?"

"Your friends! The Yule Ball! It will be fun, come on, Clover..."

I raise my eyebrows. "Friends?"

"Friends," Scarlet says firmly, glaring at me. Her voice sounding like Cass's when she's telling me to do something. Ug, Cass. Once again, I try my best to erase her from my mind, so that all that's left is just the blood on my lips.

"Life, am I right?" Scarlet is trying too hard.

"Totally," I say, just to shut her up. I fall over and shatter on the ground, but no one notices. I don't blame them.

"You going up?" Scarlet motions to the spiral staircase.

"Yeah," I say, because my doom was already sealed before this.

"Great," Scarlet pants, as we climb the stairs to the Common Room. "So, how are you doing?"

Awful, I thought, but since I'm never one to sit on my feelings, I said "Great."

"Nice," Scarlet said, and pretends not to notice the heavy air that settles between us.

One flight of stairs later, we reach the eagle knocker. It guards the tower, giving riddles to the students who tried to go in. Get it right, into the warm room you go. Get it wrong, and you have to wait for someone else to come with the right answer.

"Want to?" Scarlet gestured to it.

"Yup," I say, only somewhat rudely.

"What gives birth to its mother, who gives birth to it?" The knocker asked.

We both paused for a moment. "Day and night," Scarlet decided, at the same time I said, "A weird incested family with time travel."

"Correct," the door swung open.

"What?" Scarlet frowned as she stepped through. "Who's right? It has to be me!"

"Hey!"

"But even if someone, in theory, if someone went back and- you know..."

"Fucked their dad."

Scarlet grimaced. "Yeah, that. But the child still wouldn't be the mom, because the daughter and the grandmother don't have the same genes."

"Well, the kid/mother wouldn't be the same person, no, but they would be a person.  Unless the kid/mother going back to their own time influenced the mother-mother's decision to have a kid, it could work," I am so confused. I have no idea if I'm making sense or not, but the look on Scarlet's face is worth whatever hogwash I'm sprouting. 

I refuse to glance around to see if she is here. What will I do if she is? What will I do if she isn't?

"Relax," Scarlet has no such worries. "Artemis is out seeing Grace."

I nod numbly, mumbling something to the floor -who didn't ask- about how I'm fine.

"From a friend to a friend, can I give you some advice?" Scarlet pauses on her way up to the dorms.

I had been planning on spending the precious time I had in the Common Room with Artemis reading, but reluctantly, I join her. "I guess."

"Your problem isn't Artemis," she began.

"I disagree."

Scarlet, being sensible, ignored me. "Your problem isn't even that you're scared of commitment," she sat down on her bed.

"Good. Being scared of commitment- so unoriginal," Alura declared from her bed, where she was reading a book. I hadn't even noticed she was in the room. Well, Scarlet's little therapy session is getting very uncomfortable.

"You're just terrified you're going to hurt whoever you love. And it's killing you."