Wildling

Chapter 39

~~~Jaxson's POV~~~
It felt like years. Years that I've been chained. Years that I've watched myself be violated and tortured and raped. Only it wasn't me. It was my mate. The love of my life, who had been through all of this. Each new memory I experienced I realized over and over again that it wasn't me. It was Ember. Each time I would look down and realize I was in Ember's body.

I couldn't take it anymore. Her pain and misery. Her feelings of loneliness, despair, and anger. My heart physically hurts that she has ever experienced this much pain. How many more of these memories are there? How had she ever survived this?! I needed it to be done. I needed to wake up and hug my mate. I've seen how close to death she's been and the thought that I could have lost her...I just can't. I finally got to one of the last memories.

The musky smell of dirt and mold drifted into my nostrils as I took a deep breath, waking from my sleep. I ached everywhere and I felt so heavy. My arms were chained, and I wrenched them back and forth trying to break free. What the fuck was going on? Where was I?

My stomach clenched in horrendous muscle spasms. Like my intestines were being twirled around a knife, that was plunged in my abdomen, like spaghetti around a fork.

The sensation of warm, sticky liquid running down the inside of my legs made me glance down. I realized for the millionth time that I was in Ember's body. Feeling what she felt, experiencing it. A pool of blood was quickly collecting underneath my feet. What the fuck! I felt realization dawn on me. Grief and despair suddenly filling my body.

I felt faint. The blood loss becoming too much. I felt done. Like nothing else mattered and I was resigned in my fate. I wanted it. The cell door opened, revealing that thin, evil looking man. The bastard that was responsible for all this. He snarled in my face, his eyes turning red as he breathed in the scent of my blood.

"You fucking cunt. You aborted it?" Aborted what the hell is he talking about? Oh god. My heart dropped to my stomach. She is pregnant. My mate is pregnant with another man's child.

I felt bile rise in my throat and glanced back down to the puddle of blood my, or Ember's, feet were slipping in. Her baby. I could feel her despair. How badly she wished this wasn't true. How she wished this child were alive to grow inside her. She was heartbroken. But I also felt her disgust with herself that she even cared. I knew she would have been a good mother. Despite all that bastard has done to her, the fact that he is her cousin and had raped and tortured her, she would never hold that against her baby. Her confusion at the situation killed me. She didn't know what she was supposed to think or feel.

What killed me even more was feeling both her emotions and Ares' as they felt Aoralia die. Ares roared and whimpered wanting to claw his way out and kill the asshole right then. I watched on as Dimitri dragged us to another room, a doctor standing by. He strapped us down, we were barely conscious.

I was forced to watch and do nothing as he stabbed and cut into us. Killing any chance of us having our own pups.
I woke up with a gasp, tears streaming down my face. I grabbed Ember and held her close. Her eyes shot open and widened at my tortured state. She scrambled up and straddled my lap, cupping my face in her hands as she tried to dry my tears.
More kept coming, pushing out of my eyes. Ember wrapped her arms around me and laid my head in her neck. Her soft skin soothing mine. She rubbed my back and whispered how much she loved me. I sobbed into her, clutching her to me fiercely. How could she sit here comforting me when she was the one who went through that? She lost her child. She lost her wolf. She can no longer carry pups. Our pups.

I was so angry I wanted to tear through the forest and kill anything in my way. But I was also so distraught. I don't know what to do. Ember needs me to be here for her and to talk this through but all I want to do is punch something.
"I'm so sorry." She whispered. I pulled back and saw the tears glistening in her eyes. She slowly climbed off my lap looking unsure.

I shook my head emphatically. "So-sorry for w-what? I choked out trying to calm myself.

I took a breath to compose my thoughts. "The fact that you're still standing here, is amazing to me. You are so fucking strong. Baby I couldn't......I can't. Fuck!" I jumped up and threw my fist through the wall. Ember jumped slightly as Ares took control.

"He murdered my other half!" He roared. "I felt her die! I felt her leave this earth! He raped you and placed his seed into you! You grew his child inside of you!" Ember flinched, tears streaming from her face.

Ares stop! You're hurting Ember! Stop this! I fought to take back control before he did or said something, we would both regret. He's in such a blind rage that he can't see how much his words are affecting her.

"You grieved the loss of that baby. I felt it. And I understand. I do. But I hate the fact that he took that away from us. He stripped you of the ability to have pups, our pups!" Ares bellowed, pacing angrily in front of Ember's distressed form. She was shaking. His teeth lengthened, aching to rip into someone's flesh. To feel their blood dripping from his mouth as he tore skin from fat and fat from muscle. To bury his muzzle into their innards and drag them from their body as they writhed in pain.

Ember's broken sob broke Ares from his trance. Her arms were wrapped around her naked body as if she were trying to bring herself comfort.

"Oh, my little mate. I'm sorry." Ares' remorseful gaze searched Ember. "I love you and I don't hold anything against you. I'm just so angry for you and for Aoralia and any future pups we would have had." He made a move to wrap his arms around her but instead, she fell to the ground. Her mouth dropped open and a scream of agony tore from her lips.

"Ember!" I regained control and raced to her side. Scream after scream tore from her lips. Her face morphed into one of complete anguish. She clawed at the ground in agonizing pain. Scratch marks embedded in the hard wood as she grasped at anything to help her through the pain.

Sean! Sean! Come to my room quick! Bring Ash!

What's going on? Sean's sleep filled voice echoed in my head.

Somethings wrong with Ember! I watched helplessly as she thrashed in pain. Her voice hoarse from her screams. I watched as her limbs began to twist and morph.

What. The. Fuck. This is impossible. How is this happening?

Sean and Ash burst through the bedroom door, not the slightest bit unnerved that we were both naked. Their focus on a suffering, screaming Ember. They gasped, watching her bones crack and contort.

"Sean. I think she's shifting." His eyes snapped to mine in disbelief.