Shadows Of Madness (Slowly Being Edited)

chapter 5

Chapter 5

Hope you enjoy!

*********************************************

Hayden’s P.O.V

Stella… Stella…The best name I had ever heard. She is my angel, my love, my sweet… Stella. Where did she go? I need to find her. Am I going to see her again? Am I going to hold her in my arms? Am I going to kiss her like there is no tomorrow? Am I going to tell her about my feelings? I loved her from the first sight. Is she going to believe me? All of these questions I couldn't find any answers to them. It’s like a difficult quiz where you answer the questions to win the prize of the era. I was standing still not knowing what I should do, where I should go.

“Hayden… Hayden, please come back with me,” my brother was begging me to go back to that damn house.

“No,” I said curtly, allowing no emotion in my voice.

“Please come back with me,” he whispered. You could hear the tears in his voice.

“Why should I come back? Huh? Tell me! All my dreams have been destroyed. I can’t be a hunter, I lost all my powers. I am a weak pathetic boy in my parents’ eyes. I am going to die soon…So what’s this stupid life for?  I couldn’t do anything! All my dreams can’t be true now, they’re just faded images. You see me like a weak, pathetic boy don’t you? You always try to help me; to protect me from ever thing. But why am I living now? Huh? Tell me… I can’t live without these cures, ever day thousands of pills. I am not a normal boy; this strange illness is killing me from the inside out. It’s slowly killing ever cell in my body… So you tell me. Tell me why in the hell am I living now? I am just A LIVING DEAD!” I half whispered, half shouted at my brother. I wanted to cry, to die, but I can’t kill myself now. Maybe one day I will meet her again, my angel… And I, I wanted comfort my brother, but I can’t I would look more pathetic than ever.

“Hayden…” he said, trying to figure out what exactly he wanted to says.

“Don’t say anything. I am not this pathetic boy anymore! I don’t need your pity, so leave me alone.” I whispered lowly, silently hoping that he will stay with me, but my anger and my ego had kept me from voicing my real feelings.

“Please, don’t leave,” he was begged. How pathetic. “Stay,” he whispered. It was so quiet I had to strain my ears to hear it. It hurt to see my brother so broken, so vulnerable.

“Sorry I can’t,” I was trying to mask my feelings but failing miserably. How can I be this heartless bastard to my twin? I readied my feet to walk away, but was paralyzed by the emotions on my brother’s face. This was the first time I had seen Hunter like that. He is always trying to look strong but right now he was broken, so hurt. I turned in my heels, showing him my back to hide my tears, but he hugged my back tightly. He didn’t want me to leave, and I couldn’t keep making him cry. How could I hurt him in this way? It turned around in his arms and took in his tear stained face. “Hunter let me go,” I said putting my hands on his red cheeks. He was breathing so hard, trying to control the silent sobs from his body. I wouldn’t have even known he was crying so hard if I hadn’t turned around.

“I…” he looked at me like he would, but instead squeezed me tighter. “I can’t. You’ll go away. You will leave me all alone” he whimpered, breathing a bit more steadily now.

“I am not going anywhere so stop, please,” I begged, tears now flowing freely down my face. “I can’t see you like this… You always look so strong but right now…” I cried, wrapping my arms around him, gripping him in a hug.

“Really… you are not leaving?” he looked up at me with hope in his voice but sorrow still filled his eyes.

“Yeah…” I whispered. He looked at me apprehensively.