Mixed Masala

Chapter 22

One year later ...

"Happy birthday, bro!"

Suresh grinned at the younger boy. "Thanks, Raj."

"So you all set?" Meera's brother asked, opening the door and peering outside.

Suresh took another look at himself in the mirror and sighed, "I guess so."

""Good, because everyone's waiting ... and there's a hell of a lot of everyone out there!"

Suresh sighed. "Meera wanted something small scale ... "

"Are you kidding?!" Raj remarked, rolling his eyes. "We are Indians, man! There's no such thing as small scale."

Suresh nodded his head slowly, then suddenly said, "See if you can spot an old hag with a constipated look on her face sitting somewhere in the front row."

Raj took another look and said, "Yep, your granny's there."

Suresh groaned. "And still breathing?"

Raj chuckled. "For now. Do you want me to move her up to the stage? The smoke ought to do her in."

Suresh grinned. "Don't think that that hadn't occurred to me."

"I take it she's fussing again?" Raj asked, remembering the scene the old woman had created when she had found out that Suresh and Meera were planning to have the longer Tamil wedding ceremony as opposed to the shorter Malayalee version.

"You blink once and it's all over," Lakshmi had said when the young couple had first discussed their plans with their parents. "It's a once in a lifetime experience and it should last longer than just a few seconds ... What do you think, Ambika?"

"I agree," Suresh's mother had said, smiling happily. Anything to piss the old woman off.

"What's the big deal anyway?" Raj had asked, having suddenly appeared out of nowhere and obviously having eavesdropped from somewhere. "It just means that Suresh will have a chance to make a run for it in case he changes his mind midway ... and I can't say I'd blame him. Meera is a loony."

As for Vishwanath and Suresh's father, Prabhagaran, neither cared one way or the other. They just wanted the women to deal with everything and leave them out of it.

"Just tell us where and when and we'll be there," Suresh's father had remarked and Vishwanath had very eagerly seconded the motion.

All close family members on both sides were then informed, including Suresh's grandmother who was anything but pleased and more than happy to voice her utter displeasure.

"But we are Malayalees. Suresh is a Malayalee. How can we have a Tamil wedding?! How could you let this happen?!" she had berated her son.

Suresh's father had held his head up high and replied firmly, "I had nothing to do with it. Ambika and Lakshmi are planning everything."

Prabhagaran Menon had learned long ago that he would never be able to please his mother. Nobody could. He had also learned that the best way to escape her was to simply shift the blame onto someone else and continue to act ignorant ... which truly was blissful. Unfortunately, this time around he had inadvertently put his wife in his mother's warpath, but he knew that somehow (as always) Ambika would survive.

"Anyway, Amma, what does it matter? You like Meera, don't you? You said so yourself." Not that it would have made the slightest difference to Suresh if she hadn't, Prabhagaran had thought to himself.

But the old woman was far from consoled. "That's not the point. We are still Malayalees. We cannot simply give up our traditions!"

"But Amma, it's still a Hindu wedding. It's all the same."