When you were in high school, you were bullied horribly. Hurtful words became physical actions. Everyday after school, you would go home crying your eyes out hoping someone would notice; anyone. Your parents would never be home. They came home maybe once every 2 months but besides that, you never saw them. You had a job after school and you had so much on your plate. In order to get rid of some stress, you would cut yourself. Cut after cut you watched the blood trickle down your arm. It was your only escape from reality. It was your way to relax. You fell into a state of depression sooner or later and things just got worse. You wouldn't eat for days on end. You just laid in bed on the weekends, only getting up the brush your teeth and use the restroom. High school was a dark time. Everything was awful until you met Demi. They were just so amazing to you and your world flipped upside down. They were so kind and caring and you felt loved for the first time in forever. They're constantly reminding you of how beautiful and strong you are. If only you saw what Demi saw, maybe you wouldn't have ever been in this position in the first place.
You scrolled through your phone, looking at all the beautiful bodies. You looked down at your thighs and compared them to the model's thighs. You started to get upset so you just cut off your phone. You got up to get ready for work. Demi was downstairs watching tv. You grabbed your purse and phone and walked downstairs. You walked over to the couch and sat next to Demi. "I'm going to work. I'll be back around 3 ok? Love you," you said as you pecked their lips. "Love you too. Have a good day." You kissed their cheek and got up and walked out the door.
When you got to work everything was just so intense. Your boss put so much pressure on you and pretty much expected you to be perfect. He made your coworkers' jobs your responsibility and let them goof off. Worst of all they got paid more than you did even though they barely worked. On your break you went to the bathroom and cried your heart out. Everything feels like it's crashing down. You started digging through your purse for some tissue. You composed yourself and got out of the bathroom. You absolutely hated yourself at the moment but you had a job to do. After your shift was over, you went into the hygiene section and bought some razors blades . You headed back towards the restroom. You went into a stall and opened up the blades. Your hands trembled as you held the cold blade in your hand. You've come so far but you felt like this was the only solution. Like this was the only way to give you some relief. You dragged the blade across your skin and watched the blood trickle down your arm. You cut yourself a couple of more times before getting some tissue and wiping up the blood. It was a little past 2:45 and you headed back home. Demi was in the kitchen looking for a snack. They heard the key jingle in the door and you opened it and walked in. You smiled for the first time that day as you saw Demi walk towards you. Before they gave you a hug, you made sure to pull your jacket sleeves down to be sure they wouldn't see the cuts. "Hey baby, how was your day?"
"It was good," you reply hoping she didn't see right through your lie. Unfortunately for you, Demi knows you better than you know yourself. "No it wasn't. Tell me what's going on."
"Demi I'm fine. Really. I'm just a little tired."
"Ok. Just let me know if you need me for anything at all."
You walk up to you guy's shared bedroom. You grab some clothes and walk to the bathroom and lock it. You drop your clothes onto the counter and started to run some water to take a bath. You started to take your clothes off and tried to not look in the mirror. You failed and stared at your figure. You started to think about the pictures you saw on your phone earlier this morning. Tears started to roll down your face and you looked down. You saw the cuts from earlier and the tears started to fall even faster. You cut your bath water off and heard footsteps. You stopped your crying and took a deep breath. "Hey princess, you okay in there" you heard Demi ask.
"Yeah I'm fine. I'm just gonna take a bath real quick to relax some. I'll be out soon," you reply trying to keep your voice as calm as possible. As soon as you heard her walk away you started crying again. About an hour later, you decided to get out of the tub. You put your clothes on and walked out of the bathroom. You saw Demi on the bed and went over to sit next to them. They smiled and turned next to you. They saw your eyes noticing how red and puffy they were. "Baby you are not ok. Just please let me know what's bothering you."
"Demi I'm fine. If something were wrong, I would've told you by now. Soap just got into my eyes and it hurt like hell. Don't worry about me," you say slightly laughing hoping it'll help your lie. It was a little after 5 by now and you were getting tired. You noticed Demi starting to look down at you and you quickly tugged at your sleeves making sure she didn't see the cuts. They furrowed their eyebrows in confusion. "I made you a snack if you want it." You thought about it for a second and your mind immediately went to the models. "Nah I'm good for now. Thank you though. Can we just cuddle. I'm ready to go to bed."
"I can't say no to cuddles." They opened their arms and you scooted over to them. For the first time today, you felt safe and secure. You felt loved. After a while your heard Demi breathing slowly and you realized they had fallen asleep. You scooted down a little to pull the covers over each other. They laid down on their pillow and so did you. You pulled your shirt sleeves down once more and started to think of the events of the day. Your stomach started to growl. You haven't eaten anything today and you realized that you were back to your old ways. You cried yourself to sleep. Hopefully tomorrow would be better.
