I Write Romances, Not Live Them

Chapter 25

"Where can you run to escape from yourself?" - Dare You To Move-Switchfoot

Light broke through my windows and illuminated the space where I had laid all night long. My joints were stiff from holding myself for hours on end, my face was tear and makeup stained so I got up to wash it all off, wondering if that would make me feel anymore alive.

I gasped when my eyes met my reflection, mascara was running down my red and irritated eyes, my cheeks stained with black tears. But that wasn't what shocked me. It was the fact that the person looking back at me wasn't me. It couldn't be. That girl was the farthest thing from who I am. That girl had tried to ruin a relationship, she'd used a friend of hers, she had gone back on promises she made to herself. That girl looked exactly like the girls in high school. It wasn't until them that I really saw who I had become.

I scrubbed my face roughly with a cloth until I was washed clean. But when I looked again, my face was clean but I still saw the girl. The cheating, lying, conniving girl still looked back at me. Because that was who I had become.

I ran from my reflection, collected my breath and just tried to forget.

From my desk I heard the sound of my phone beep, a sign of low battery. When I picked it up to charge it, I saw I had over 10 missed calls. I was puzzled and hoped some of them were from Bria or Sophie. When all of them were from my Dad, I started to panic. It had to be an emergency, he wouldn't just keep calling if it wasn't deathly important. My fingers couldn't find the buttons fast enough to redial him, until I found he'd left messages. Then, they wouldn't load fast enough. A million different scenarios ran through my mind. Someone had been in an accident, he was in an accident, he had called me instead of 911, knowing he just had to use his last words on me.

As his voice came on, I pressed it closer to my ear and listened, the only sound was the droplets of rain on my window as it spat outside.

“Hey, Addy. I just needed to call and ask if you could come home tomorrow. I-I haven't seen you in awhile and I, uh, just really miss you. Please come home, sweetie.” His voice was slowly breaking, he was speaking in fragments. And then, it cracked altogether along with my heart. “I love you, baby girl. Please, come see, me. Goodbye.”

The next two were the same. Each sentiment was getting more desperate by the minute. What was I missing in all of this? What was so special about today?

I checked it on the calendar by the kitchen sink. There was nothing written on the little square, it was only circled. Because why mark days you should always remember? And when I did, I felt my knees go weak and I just knew what I had to do. All the apologies I had to give had to be put on hold as I sprinted to my room and fit on an old pair of ragged jeans and a hair band to push it out of my face. I searched frantically for my license, all the time running from place to place. I couldn't waste a single second. My dad was waiting three hours away for me and I should have been there yesterday. I should have listened to him and not spent all my time in my stupid schemes and plots. I'd forgotten about all that mattered. The date slipped my mind way too easily, and my tears were wasted the night before. I always spent today with my dad for fours years in a row, then. We weren't meant to spend today alone, as no one should be.

From memory I knew that the soonest bus that would take me in the direction of Eastaven, my home town, wasn't leaving for another two hours. The car I used to have was sold off nearly three years ago after finding it's use limited and it's expenses not justifying the means. I ran to the only people that might have a car, unfortunately, neither would be willing to lend it to me. I just couldn't take no for an answer.