Baby Boy's POV
We haven't seen each other for how long...over a month? And I miss her, I miss her then when we still see each other more often..but I miss her more that I hardly see her. Only in my ipad or my tv screen do I get to see her smile, hear her laugh, her bubbly voice.
The last time I saw her was the time I swallowed all the remaining shame I have..when I literally murdered the song "We've Got Tonight," but believe me even if I tried so hard to sound the lyrics in my head with the right tune, I can't!
“Gerald, halika!” with that sweet voice of hers, calling me back after we sang WLADWY, the crowd were screaming their lungs out, my knees were weak, but she held my hand guiding me back in the center of the stage, I was smiling but deep inside I was too damn nervous, why? I had to sing LIVE and not even a duet with her, it’s okay if it was duet at least most of the time sinasalo nya ako, but this time, it was just ME! Me, myself and I!
“Halika dito,” she said as she held my hand in hers. She was so playful.
I didn’t know why but she just gave me the courage to do it..to sing live.. and I didn’t want to disappoint my baby girl..
I hesitated… But damn it, she was waiting for me, I saw her standing there with pride in her eyes- urging me silently with her look of love, assuring me silently that I can do it- it was my time to shine. That it was my time to shock and rock Araneta and boy did I? Not in the so good way I hoped it came out- but I was able to surpass the awkward feeling.. the fear of making all the notes the same- I sure did that...but to hell with my own embarrassment, I just can't let her down, she was expecting me to do it as what we rehearsed then. And I did, all for the love of her.
At first the words won't come out of my mouth, it's like all the words crumbled halfway between my throat and my mouth- at least that's what I felt. My knees were trembling, my hands were cold.
And when I finally grasped the words, she tried to start the tone of it for me…then, I started singing.. If you can call it that.. it's more like reciting...a poem or something.. but what the hell! If that’s what it means to love someone and swallow my pride and embarrassment, so be it!
I looked at her, and sang my heart out.. believe me the words were so fitting – what with what we have right now..we’ve got tonight – just the two of us, it felt like it even if there were thousands around us, screaming...
"I know it's late, I know you're weary
I know your plans don't include me
Still here we are, both of us lonely
Longing for shelter from all that we see
Why should we worry, no one will care girl
Look at the stars so far away
I was still looking at her, and then held her hands in mine, I felt happy, happy that at least we felt we were alone, our eyes only for each other..I didn’t want the moment to end, but I want the song to.
We've got tonight, who needs tomorrow?
I just held on to her hands, not looking away – finding my courage to continue and finish the last two lines…I felt her warmth in my hands...I felt her love. I continued...I just love her...
We've got tonight babe
Why don't you stay?
Whooooo! I was able to do it, and it was worth it after she applauded…the evident pride in her voice, I knew it was worth it.
I thanked Araneta and said sorry for the song, but I was glad I did it, it made her happy. And it always made me happy to see her happy.
The crowd shouted for us to kiss, and boy did I wish I could, but not only on her cheeks..but I wanted so badly to envelope her in my arms and feel her lips in mine. I was tempted.. but I know I will be dead if I did that. By her parents, the management- although our fans will go crazy if we kissed.
She was never kissed on screen before, and I guess not even in real life. I would be happy to be the first to let her feel the wonderful feelings of kissing – I’d die if I could.
Instead, I walked to her and whispered if it was okay, that is to kiss her on her cheeks, she nodded and I kissed her. Goddamnit I kissed her! Though only on her cheeks, I felt good, it felt good- I smelled the familiar scent of perfume she knows I love.
It took me a tremendous amount of control not to grab her and kiss her but I’m proud that I didn’t.
If ever I did, I would want it in private, just the two of us... it would be more magical that way, I wouldn’t even want it for a movie or tv..I want it just for us. No one else would see it...only her and me- who will feel it, savor the moment.
Oh, God I missed her so. I looked at her photo on my ipad, she is my wallpaper. I am not feeling to good, they said I had vertigo and I needed rest. And so I did, but I rested with her in my thoughts. I was in pain physically, but my heart is much more in pain.. I was in agony not seeing her, not talking to her.
But we should be patient, next time it won’t be just like “We’ve got tonight” moment, next time it will be our turn to say “forevermore...and til death do us part..”
I can only hope, Oh God I can only hope.
I closed my eyes and in my heart I hope she feels it,too… I said in the silence of my room…”I love you, Sarah,” not screaming type like her fans, but simple I love you Sarah, yes, I am her fan, too but as a man.
I love her deeply.
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A/N
O ayan while wala pang update yong ibang story ko...hahaha good vibes! AshRald is LOVE.
