{DENIAL}

• one •

"Hey, you know you have a show with Chris Brown next month." Jemel said, as he looked through the schedule.

"Oh yeah, Courtney told me about that." Lizzo replied.

She was laying on the floor of her dance studio, since she had just finished choreography for her upcoming show. She didn't remember how she ended up sprawled on the floor, but she was comfortable so she didn't bother to move.

Jemel glanced at her and laughed, "You're so fucking weird."

"Excuse me? I'm wonderful." Lizzo giggled, looking at the unusually bland ceiling.

"I didn't say you weren't wonderful. I just said you were weird."

She smiled, more to herself than him. He didn't notice her reaction to what he said, and she was okay with that. Leave him wondering, she thought.

Jemel and Lizzo had been friends for five years now, ever since Janelle Monae introduced them. Jemel had originally been Janelle's choreographer but she suggested him to Lizzo, and the rest is history. They became good friends quickly and eventually found themselves spending time with each other almost everyday. They both knew there was absolutely no way their bond could ever be broken.

Lizzo quickly grabbed her stomach in embarrassment as it began to growl. "Uh, nigga I'm hungry."

"You think I don't know?" He grinned, as he shut his laptop and stood up.

He was hovering over her body, his arms crossed to emphasize the fact that he was waiting for her to get up. She stared into his eyes with a soft smile, before lifting herself off the ground.

"I'm thinking falafels. What restaurant has those?" She asked.

Jemel shook his head, "I know you well enough to know that you always want falafels."

"What? They're so good!"

He chuckled and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. This let her know that he was putting effort into making her feel secure. Every time someone shady walked by, she could feel him pull her closer. It was a great feeling.

~~~

When they made it to the restaurant, they ordered their food and it came within, (what felt like), seconds. There were proper utensils to crack open the lobster they had also ordered, but Lizzo couldn't wait to eat and she had no problem getting her hands dirty.

Jemel looked up at her after situating his food the way he liked, "I stop paying attention to you for three seconds and you've already made the biggest mess. You're like a toddler sometimes, I swear."

"Shutup! I was hungry." She laughed, "I'll clean it up..."

He smiled at her, and continued eating his food neatly. "You ready for these shows?"

"Yes. I'm nervously excited, you know what I mean? I'm ready to give people the night of their lives."

"I don't think I've said this enough but," he paused to swallow his food quickly, "I'm really proud of you. You've improved so much, and it's a privilege to personally watch you grow. You're spreading light and positivity in the world, which is what we need right now. But, you're also sharing the dark moments of life to allow people to relate and understand how authentic you really are. And you're being yourself unapologetically, which is always a bonus. I'm just really happy for you. You deserve this."

His mini-speech had left Lizzo with her mouth slightly open, unable to form words to reply. "You didn't have to say all of that, I—wow, that was beautiful, Jemel. Thank you."

"Of course. I don't think I say that enough, so now seemed like the perfect opportunity to let you know."

"I've heard that from people I don't know, but to hear that from someone I'm close to makes me emotional. I always worry about how proud those around me really are, so it's nice to hear that. Again, thank you. I didn't realize how much I needed that." Lizzo grinned, her eyes brimming with tears but not enough for Jemel to notice.

She sniffed quietly, "Let's get out of here. I know we're short on time."

"Right." He agreed.

~~~
"I love you all so much and you better love yourselves too! Thank you for such a good night!" Lizzo happily yelled her last words on stage, and disappeared into the back room.

She made it to her dressing room and began stripping off her clothing to put on the clothes she had been wearing before. She heard the door open, and panicked, thinking she had locked it. She attempted to cover herself, but ended up having to use her hands. She was in her lace underwear and bra, so she hoped it was one of her best friends that had walked in.

She was surprised to see that it was Dave. "Loved your show tonight."

"Oh my God, it's you!" It angered her to see him.

They tried to date earlier in the year, but he left her for another chick that he had previously been with. It didn't go over well for Lizzo, so she vowed to never speak to him again. Clearly, that vow was broken.

"Why the fuck are you here?" She asked, as Dave locked the door with a smirk on his face.

He approached her and bent down to whisper in her ear, "Because I can be."

Lizzo melted every time he spoke. He had one of those smooth voices that just aroused you immediately no matter what the situation was. This was one of those situations. She couldn't escape him, and at this moment, she didn't want to.

She remained silent as he cornered her into a wall, making sure to dim the lights beforehand. His lips brushed against her neck and she immediately came to her senses.

He felt a firm slap against his cheek, and rubbed his face instinctively. "I know you did not just do that! The fuck was that for?"

"You really think you can walk back into my life like nothing happened, by showing your lust towards me? How about showing that you care? Or that you love me? Nice to know all you wanted was my body!"

"If you raise your voice one more time," he placed his hands around her neck harshly, "you'll wish you hadn't."

Lizzo hadn't seen this side of him, and she never believed he would ever be the abusive type. The fuckboy type? Hell yeah. Abusive didn't fit his personality though. There was an underlying truth in the way he was acting but she wasn't about to risk getting physically hurt over an ex's feelings.

She quickly swung her foot in between Dave's legs and headed for the door, "You've lost your fucking mind."

"You bitch!" He groaned and curled himself up in a ball on the floor, trying to find a sense of relief.

"Sure. I'm the one who did all the wrong here, cause clearly I'm the one who left you for somebody else. You must be the one who apologized profusely because they felt guilty about something they didn't do. I must've forgotten. You were the caring one." She said sarcastically, before grabbing the rest of her clothes.

"I never want to see you again!"

~~~~~
A/N: tell me if there are any typos, I wrote this pretty quickly. hope you like it, chapter two is on its way :)