Lime and Soda ✓

twenty-nine - release

'I'm sorry.'

'Stop saying that!'

A sigh. 'What do you want me to say?'

Their voices lower, become incoherent whispers. Through the crack in the open door, I can see them, sitting on the sofa as close as they can possibly get to one another, both of their hands entwined.

'Was it... just because of that? Of home?'

He shrugs. 'I don't know. It was everything. School, or lack of...' he gives a humourless laugh. 'Home... I'm just not doing anything. It's like the only thing there is to do, the only thing that makes me feel anything, is drink.'

I hover, just behind the door, the cups of tea growing slowly cold in my hands as I deliberate whether to interrupt. I don't know if this is something I should be hearing, but I can't seem to move.

Her answer is too low for me to hear.

He shakes his head vehemently. 'Never. I would never do that to you again. And, anyway...' His sentence is punctuated by an enormous sigh. 'I thought you hated me. Thought no one would really care.'

Her voice rises angrily, and this time I can't help but hear. 'How could you think that? After all those texts I sent you!'

He shrugs. 'I just thought you were worried about me. I didn't think that meant you wanted to be with me after everything that happened.'

This time her voice is quiet, trembling, as if she's about to burst into tears, but I can hear her words clearly. 'There has never been a time when I didn't want to be with you.'

I clear my throat loudly, making a show of stamping my feet, and knock on the door.

'Come in,' says Astrid softly, and I enter the room cautiously.

They both look up at me like deer blinded by car headlights, and clutch each other's hands all the more tightly as though they're scared I'm going to rip them apart. I feel a sudden urge to laugh.

'Just brought you guys some tea,' I say cheerfully, placing the mugs down on the coffee table. They nod, but don't say anything, and I can tell that they want me to leave, that this conversation is too important to be broken up by cups of tea.

'I'll just, um... be in the kitchen. If you need me.'

I back out and shut the door firmly behind me, blocking out the sounds of their voices, and walk away, my fingers crossed in my pocket.

-

It was decided that, as Ross' home was too unstable to be a relaxing place for him to recover, he should stay with us for a few weeks. This was mostly decided by Bea, who was determined that he should be cared for properly despite the fact that we no longer had any spare beds in the house. I don't think his mother got much say in the matter.

Ross' father moved out two days after he came out of hospital. We heard it from his mother, who came to visit, clutching his hand tightly as she told him the news. I remembered what I had seen as an act of love, the two of them holding hands by Ross' bed that night, and was surprised. I had somehow thought that this might change things. When I said as much to Bea, she shook her head sadly.

'They've made up their minds, love,' she said, as though that explained everything.

Astrid was let out of hospital the afternoon after we left with assurances that she would be fine, she just needed time to get over the shock. When I went to visit her at home, I followed Sandy down the hall feeling apprehensive of what I might find. The screaming, hysterical Astrid of that night was someone I'd never seen before, and she scared me.