The Pseudo-Chronicles of Mark Huntley

How to Remember the Dead - 11/04/04

Thursday, November 4, 2004

I am not dead. The last entry shouldn't have been a cliffhanger for you because I'm obviously writing all of this two days after the fact. 

The stunning part for me is why I'm not dead. Especially in the immediate aftermath of that man shooting at me, there seemed to be no good answer to that question. I'm not satisfied with the pieces of an explanation that I have. 

The two witnesses to the spectacle, Rence and Naomi, had abandoned caution and come down to the Crypt after Spitz. They’d gotten close enough to see me cheat death. They have differing reports, weirdly enough. But the sum of both is still greater than my memories of what happened, which total approximately zip. 

Rence's version: 

Shortly before the human guard fired on me, I became blurry. It looked like a kind of forcefield had suddenly encased me. The bullet from the guard's gun glanced off the forcefield. Which likely had something to do with the Unnameable suddenly taking over my body, because right then I jumped up and the knife was in my hand. Before the purple guard behind me, the reeker of gasoline, knew what was happening, I had slit her wide open. 

Naomi's version: 

No forcefield. But I began to writhe on the floor just before the guard fired. And then, almost too quick to see— and she swears this is what she saw— the knife actually came out of my forehead to deflect the bullet. Then I jumped up, and the knife fell into my waiting palm, and the purple guard behind me meets the same fate that Rence described. 

How do I explain the disparity between what they saw? Do I even try?

The only idea I’ve got is that my transformation into the silver god's avatar— or plaything, or whatnot— looks different to different people. Depending on their degree of seeing things silver- and purple-related. With INER having apparently tinkered with Naomi's brain, she probably has the advantage there. 

So maybe the knife really did come out of my head. Why should that make any less sense than it coming out of my wrist? And Rence couldn’t see it through the blurriness, which was not a forcefield after all but some kind of visible release of something—energy?— when Big Silv dived into my body. Rence didn't see any blurriness when the Unnameable took over me on the street earlier that night, or up on the roof of the tower in Silver Spring… but in both of those instances there was a lot less light and lot more dark. This time, it was inside, under a chandelier, for all to see. 

Regardless. In that moment, the overmind saved my life. And he probably wouldn't have been able to if that purple guard hadn't been looming over me. Her nearness triggering the takeover. So, thanks, Lord o' Silvers. And thanks also to the gutted purple. 

My memories start just a moment after killing the purple, meaning the silver god only stayed in me for a brief time. Why it didn't stick around to handle the rest of the battle, I don't know. Either it's physically unable to stay in me for long... or I couldn't physically play host for long. 

How long can a mortal shell hold a god? Interesting question— one that I wouldn't want to test. 

Perplexed by his failure the first time, the human guard got ready to fire again. But Rence robbed him of the chance with a hard kick to his back and sent him stumbling. That was where I came in again. Just in time to see the man on his knees, his gun shocked out of his hand. He reached into his pocket and brought out some device, but then Rence punched him in the head and he dropped the device too. Was that what I thought it was? 

The other purple guard, the tubby one who wanted to make the Crypt live up to its name, went for the detonator. And then I saw one of the most terrifying things I've ever had the misfortune to see.