5. Recipe, Easels and Sunsets

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The Art of Letting Go

5. Recipes, Easels and Sunsets

Effort, time and a strong will. These are some ingredients necessary to mend a broken heart. Time again, determination and maybe just some distractions. These are some ingredients necessary to let go of the one you love.

I'm don't believe that you need to find someone else. That would be replacing, and replacing is not a very effective method. You will begin to compare the two persons and she or he will end hurt. That's not a fair situation and that's why I don't believe in it.

Letting go is an art. Some are born with the talent of not holding on to the things they love. There are persons with such simplicity in their souls that they are happy no matter what they have or need. There are other persons that hold on too much, too tight. They can't cope with the thought of having something taken away from it. In this cases it is dangerous for this people to loose something or someone. Sometimes they can not just handle it. And then there was my type of people: the ones that understood that we weren't going to have that something or someone in our lives anymore. We were the learners of the art, of the art of letting go.

"First thing is acceptance. You need to understand that he isn't yours anymore. He is an individual, walking his own path through the world. You two crossed this path and walked it together but you took different turns. He decided to go left and you went right. Can you accept that fact?" My best friend was talking to me through the process. We were seating by a willow tree. Winter break was over and we were back at college campus.

"I already did. I know I can't own him and he needs to go his own way in this life. He has a purpose and I have one too. Maybe if we were together we couldn't accomplish them." I responded. Snow was falling gently from the clouds making our surroundings white and cold. It was beautiful yet sad. I missed the flowers and the colors of the spring. Winter was magical but it had a lack of color and life that I needed for confort.

"So, you have accepted the fact. How are you coping with it?" She asked while looking at me with her green eyes. Green, the color of hope...

"I'm fine, really. I want him to be happy above all things. What is the second thing?"

"For our second step you need to erase the feelings. This step is going to be long." She told me with a grimace. "Love is like art. The easel is the base. You decide what (or whom) you're going to work with: paper, canvas... And then you just mix the colors and emotions to create the painting or drawing. You get it?"

No. "My canvas have been taken away from me and I didn't have the chance to finish the painting." I told her in a low voice. 

"You don't need to find another canvas. Just put your own and paint your life, Emma. Don't close yourself from the opportunities." She told me. I smiled gently and exhaled. It's not going to be an easy journey but you can do it. You were the one that let him go in the first place.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

Six Months Later...

June, Summer, Sun and Home. Four great things combined to make myself and I was very happy. And you may want to ask me: How is everything with your heart? For my best friend the answer would be: 'Time is a healer. I wish him happiness and I'm happy too'. But, to be honest, it hadn't been easy.

It hadn't been easy when he texted me. It hadn't been easy when he started telling me about how great she was. It hadn't been easy when he told me that he loved her. My heart had to brake time after time. I had to hold back tears until he hung up. I had cried myself to sleep. I had felt so alone and beign back home was just what I needed. Now I could be lazy and stay in my bed all day, sniffing and eating ice cream.

"Emma, dear!" My mother's voice interrumpted my train of thoughts. There was a certain shine in her eyes that told me she had plans for my Summer.

"What do I need to do?" I asked her as nice as I could. She still frowned at me.

"The Doctor wants you at her office again this year! She told me she will let you interact with the patients directly! Isn't this marvelous?" Marvelous? Wasn't I going to get the chance to have some time of my own?

No, apparently I wasn't. Mother forced me to go to work, so there I was again. I found myself staring at the same picture once more. A year ago, I had fallen in love with the guy in it. This year my heart was breaking because of him.

My thoughts were on him when I heard the door open and automatically I checked who it was. My heart began pounding slower yet with more force. My mouth went dry and I felt a coldness in my body. Please, don't faint. Please don't faint. 

"Emma!" His voice was surprised yet happy. A grin appeared on his face and I smiled back. I felt so light, so little, so nothing... "Working here this summer again?"

"Apparently." I responded. His mind was elsewhere, I knew him enough to tell. "Something wrong, Gale? You seem distracted."

"You know me so well." He told me with a smile. "Yes, actually. Manohara's here for the weekend. I'm going to tell her how I feel. Today."

"Today?" It was a whisper but it contained so much emotion. I had to control my body from all the reactions it was starting to have. My breath started coming in short spans, my eyes were starting to get full of tears and my hands were shaking. Not to mention that I felt I was white. Gale was looking at his cellphone with a smile so he didn't notice.

"Come on, Emma!" He told me and grabbed my hand. I felt my jaw quiver. "I want you to meet her. She's at the bay." I got with him in his car and he drove off. Neither of us spoke, both lost in the thoughts. And suddenly he stopped. We were there. He grabbed a guitar from his back seat and turned to look at me. There was something in that look that made me want to die at that moment.

Sadness. I don't know why but I saw it there. His forehead rested on mine for a second and he got out. My eyes were full of tears but I got out too. That's when I understood it completely. He was my soulmate. He was the person that completed me, the one who was going to have my back no matter what. I was grateful I had dound him, even if he was going to be only a friend.

Then it all happened. He sang to the brown-haired girl that sat alone at the bench. I saw them hugging but when they started kissing I couldn't take it anymore. I walked away slowly. Tears were falling down, and my heart had ceased to beat. I had lost him but I still had myself

So I grabbed the easel and decided I would paint my own canvas. Letting Go was an art, an art I was willing to learn.

Author's Words:

 1. This is it. The final chapter :) Thanks to you all, the ones that really read this story and liked it. I hope you enjoyed it.

2. Someone's editing this, I think... If somebody has time for editing this, please message me. I have another story idea for a story but as I speak Spanish all the time I struggle with prepositions and commas and grammar a bit.

Thanks! -Veronique 

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