Katsura couldn't believe it. (F/N) was a Shinsengumi spy. She'd been stringing him along the whole time, and he'd fallen for it. He'd fallen for her. She'd taken his heart and stomped on it, yet he still found himself thinking about her pretty smile and cute laugh. It was driving him insane.
When he was able to move comfortably again, he left the infirmary for his room at the new hideout. There, he found (F/N)'s diary on his bedside table. He didn't know who put it there, but he took one look at it, and knocked it to the floor.
It fell open to a random page, and Katsura froze. There, taped to the paper, was a photograph of him and (F/N) taken at one of the Joui's parties. He was passed out drunk with sharpie whiskers on his face, and she was posing with a marker in her hand. Had she drawn those whiskers? Katsura never had found the culprit.
After a moment, he picked up the diary, and flipped to the next page, then the next. Before he knew it, he was almost to the end. As he read, he found there were three kinds of entries. The first were the entries about work.
Day twenty of Joui Rebels infiltration:
Today, I learned of Katsura's plans to replace the Shinsengumi's entire food supply with pineapple pizza. I will warm the vice-chief immediately.
Day twenty-three of Joui Rebels infiltration:
Katsura-san appears to favor soba to ramen. I will distribute this information to aid capture.
Then, there were the entries about him.
Day twenty-eight of Joui Rebels infiltration:
Today, I watched dramas with Katsura-san. He gets so invested! It's kind of funny! My hand is numb, though. I wonder if he realizes he was holding it.
Day thirty-two of Joui Rebels infiltration:
Today, I surprised Katsura-san by taking him to a cat café. He was so happy! I honestly think he was cuter than the cats! We talked for hours! I feel like I've forgotten something important, though. I'll have to write that down later.
Then, there was the third kind, and for whatever reason, those broke his heart the most. The ones about the Shinsengumi.
Day twenty-two of Joui Rebels infiltration:
There's a man here who smokes the same kind of cigarette as Hijikata-kun. Every time I smell it, I look up expecting him to be there. It's really making me miss home.
Day twenty-five of Joui Rebels infiltration:
Today, one of the men picked me up so I could get a book from a high shelf. It made me think of how Kondo-san used to parade me around on his shoulders when I was little. It's strange, I'm not exactly on speaking terms with Kondo-san right now, but I still miss him.
Day thirty-eight of Joui Rebels infiltration:
I kind of miss Sougo-kun. Not that I'm ever going to tell him that. I may hate sparring with him, but it keeps me in shape. I'm going to get rusty if I stay here much longer. Maybe I should challenge him next time. I'd still get demolished, but I'd at least get to see him look surprised.
Before he knew it, Katsura had reached the last page.
Day forty of Joui Rebels infiltration.
Today is the last day. I should be happy, but I can't stop shaking, and I feel as if I'm about to cry. Last night, Katsura-san said he loved me. I love him, too, but acting on my feelings would mean giving up my job, my home, and most importantly, my family. The thought of never seeing the Shinsengumi again hurts me more than anything. Yes, that's right. I'm doing what I have to do.
Today is my last day as a member of the Joui Rebels.
Love him? She loved him? But that was impossible! She had betrayed him and everything he stood for! Sure, it was strange that she had taken him home after the attack, but if she truly loved him, why hadn't she said something sooner? Why hadn't she told him she loved him the day he confessed to her? Why hadn't she told him everything right away and kept all of this from happening?
He turned the page over, and found a series of photos taped to the inside of the back cover. They were group photos of what appeared to be the young Shinsengumi. In the first one, (F/N) was perched on Hijikata's shoulders, grinning triumphantly. Hijikata's expression was slightly warmer than his usual scowl, and Katsura couldn't help but think he looked pleased with himself. Meanwhile, Kondo beamed, and Okita looked slightly annoyed.
The next photo was extremely blurry. Hijikata was doubled over in pain, and (F/N) sat on Okita's shoulders. Okita was saying something to Hijikata with a smirk, and (F/N) was punching Okita's head. Kondo looked as if he were ready to yell at the others for ruining the photos.
In the third photo, Hijikata and Okita were at each other's throats. (F/N) was on Kondo's shoulders, so high her head was almost cut out of the photo. She grinned down at the other two, as if bragging about how tall she was. Kondo looked every bit the proud dad, and Katsura felt something prick his heart. Something about these photographs felt familiar.
As he continued to look over them over, he noticed they were standing in front of the newly-built Shinsengumi base. That's when he realized what it was—the photos reminded him of a picture of himself, Shouyou, and the others in front of Shoka Sonjuku. When Katsura thought about it, it was a similar situation. From what (F/N) said in her diary entries, Kondo had taken her in when she was about ten years old, and she'd been with the Shinsengumi ever since. The Shinsengumi were her home, her family, her Shoka Sonjuku, yet she'd carried Katsura home, and warned the Joui that the Shinsengumi knew their location. Katsura wanted to say it was another plan of the Shinsengumi's, but he knew the truth.
He just didn't want to admit he was the reason (F/N) lost everything.
YOU ARE READING
Women are Crazy, Men are Stupid--Katsura Kotarou x Reader (Gintama)
Fanfiction(F/N) is one of the Shinsengumi's top investigators, second only to Yamazaki. Following Yamazaki's failed attempt to infiltrate the Joui Rebels, (F/N) is giving it a try, learning from the mistakes of her predecessor (all the answers are Jackie Chan...
