Once upon a long time after The Jump

Chapter 9

After the half-hearted dinner with his dad, Sam headed home, dragging his feet because he was not looking forward to returning alone to empty rooms instead of walking through the door hand in hand with Betsy after a nice dinner with their parents as he had anticipated. He had considered giving Betsy a call but decided to keep his distance and respect her wish to have some alone time with Molly. When or if she wanted to talk to him, she would. He hoped to God it would be when.

When he woke up this morning, he had been so incredibly happy. Betsy was to meet her mum at the train station already at ten, so they got up unusually early for a Saturday and he made her breakfast whilst she had a shower and got dressed. When she joined him in the kitchen with damp hair, smelling fresh of that shampoo he loved and took the plate and mug he handed her, it had struck him that he could easily imagine every morning of his life like this.

Over the last weeks he had been considering different options of what to do after passing his final examination and leaving Professor Watson's research group. This morning in the kitchen it had dawned on him that his choices now would be limited to those that meant he could keep seeing Betsy. He would not go abroad for a postdoc unless she could join him, he would not accept a job offer in a location too far away. He wanted and needed to see her almost every day, to be part of her life, that was what mattered most to him.

That had been his conclusion this morning. Now he was not sure she would want that; want to stay his girlfriend, want to make plans for a future together.

He knew that Molly had loved him once, but she had also loved his dad and what he had done, what he had put her through, seemed almost unforgivable. What if Molly told Betsy that she could not stand a connection with any James? What if she made Betsy choose? He was far from sure that he would be the one chosen then, because the bond between mother and daughter was obviously very strong. The Molly he once had known would never have forced Betsy make such a choice, but that was before his dad slept with another woman on tour. One who Molly had considered a friend, which made the betrayal so much worse. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Was that true for Molly?

During their many talks during Sam's first year of research, Charles had revealed everything to him. Gradually he had unfolded his and Molly's story to Sam, the X-rated version of how their loving relationship had spiralled down, the full picture his son never had known before. The last piece he shared tearful and full of shame, when he reluctantly admitted what he had done only a few days after Molly had said the marriage was over. Unable to look Sam in the eyes whilst telling this sordid part of his story, he had taken a large gulp from the beer bottle in his hand and fixed his gaze on a dark corner of the bar they found themselves in that evening.

"I always knew she didn't mean what she said. It wasn't over for her. It wasn't over for me either, but I wanted her to think so, to make her let go of me, because I felt like shit personified and didn't want to drag her down with me. So I did the one thing I could think of, that would really end it for both of us. For me because I knew I wouldn't do such a thing when I was in a sound loving relationship. For her because she would despise me. Hate me."

"What did you do?" Sam asked wide-eyed.

"I slept with someone else. On tour. The medic."

"Dad!"

Charles looked into Sam's appalled face which once again reminded him of the magnitude of what he had done back then, not that he had forgotten. Not only had he slept with another woman when he still was Molly's husband, but on tour and in the same role that Molly had held when they once met, somehow tainting even the beginning of their love story. He could hardly have done anything worse.