A Dark Heart - Rhysand's Sister Fanfic AU

T H I R T E E N

youll want to read the authors note, just saying

anger

🌌

"...[W]e try to maintain
a sense of normality
until we no longer can."
ㅡLori Goodwin

🌌 

+eralyn

Amren’s plan was thoroughly thought out, and while it may seem outlandish, it was a risk worth taking considering it was Feyre, Amren had said. 

I was surprised I was even able to think straight considering all that had transpired just moments ago, but I supposed it was because I had the element of surprise on my side. While Rhysand and the others had no idea about my existence, I was aware of their lives all this time. It was a shock to me to see them again, to breath in their scents and acknowledge that they were real, and not a figment of my imagination, but for them, it was as if they were seeing a ghost from its’ grave.

As much as I wanted to get out of this situation, a part of me, the child I had once been, wanted to stay. I always knew that this meeting was inevitable because no matter how far you run, the past always has a way to find its way back to you and I just had to accept that.

“I want to know everything,” Mor rushed out as a small silence ensued. I could understand the silence. What could you possibly say to someone who’d been dead for five-hundred years?

Mor was shaking uncontrollably, unable to grasp what was unfolding before her. Giving her and unsure look, I moved her to the sofa, so she could sit and, eventually, collapse as I knew she would. “Let’s sit you down.”

After making sure she’d calmed down a bit, I quietly explained everything to Mor again, since Cass and Az had already debriefed her the first time. I supposed, for Mor, it was one thing to hear it from someone else than to hear it from the source itself. By the end of the story, Mor was crying which didn’t surprise me. I could only imagine what she was going through right now, what all of them were going through right now.

“Why didn’t you come back?” she sobbed.

I  then explained to her the exact same thing I said to Rhysand. It was Cassian and Azriel's first time hearing that explanation and Cassian’s only response was a scoff.

“We would have welcomed you with open arms,” Mor cried.

I sighed. “It’d been a century, Mor. You all deserve the right to move on.” She opened her mouth to argue as I saw Rhysand clench his jaw, but I stopped her and looked to Rhysand. “Besides, considering the situation I was in back then, it wasn’t a good time.”

Mor wiped at her eyes, “What do you mean?”

Cassian spoke for me this time, and I couldn’t exactly say it was in good taste. “She means that she was busy. Eralyn’s a warrior now. Likely too busy following orders and avoiding the inevitable.”

I simply raised my brows at Cassian even as I boiled inside. Cassian was my brother, but he had no idea what I endured to get to this moment, and I’d bust his balls before he had the chance to belittle my hard work. “A lengthy accusation, Cassian.” 

“Well?” he inquired, his tone becoming heated. To an extent, I could understand his anger. After all this time, his sister who he’d idolized as his saving grace and mourned as dead was now suddenly back in his life after knowing all this time that he was alive and mourning her. I understood very well and there were nights I mulled over it in grief because it was tearing me up inside. All my life, it had never been about what I wanted. First my father, and then Maeve. After three-hundred years with Maeve, I jumped around the human lands aimlessly because I had no idea what to do with myself. For the first time in centuries, I had free will, a chance to think about all I had lost. 

I had fought against Maeve for the longest time while I thought I was enslaved to her under the blood oath, but when I got my freedom, I struggled to find my purpose. Whether I’d like to admit it or not, fighting for and against Maeve offered me a distraction from the tragedy I had endured. While nightmares plagued my mind to constantly remind me of it, I never really mourned my losses until I had been set free.

When I had broken free from Maeve, I knew it would finally be my chance to go back home, but I couldn't bring myself to do that to my brothers, both the ones in Velaris and in Doranelle. I had grown attached and made my own family, no matter how fucked up either one was. 

I leveled Cassian a look. This was becoming tedious and the strain from passing through a portal was making me exhausted. I was surprised the Illyrians hadn't passed out from exhaustion yet. “The situation wasn’t ideal for me, Cassian, but, yes, I was too busy following orders. That’s all I’m good for anyway.” I muttered the last bit. It was true though. The original reason I'm here in Velaris is to, technically, follow orders.

Cassian just shook his head and looked away from me. I looked away before my curious eyes could read the emotions swimming in his eyes. I didn’t want to know if it was disappointment. 

“Why does my head hurt?” Amren snapped, feverishly cradling it with one of her hands. 

Shifting slightly away from Mor who wouldn’t lift her hands off of me, I said, “Your body is going into overdrive. You just passed through a portal twice in one day. The headache will go away after a goodnight’s sleep.”

Amren just scowled, muttering about inconveniences and I scowled back. No one asked her to put me or her in this shitty situation. 

“It is very hard,” Azriel swallowed, “to wrap my head around this. It’s surreal.” His voice was as soft as gentle Terrasen mountain breeze and the shadows seemed to swallow him whole. He was standing next to the sofa armrest which was behind me and I could feel those very same shadows mess with my hair and curl around me, as if they, too, could not believe I was breathing. I didn’t mind and Azriel didn’t care to stop them. 

"It'll be that way for a while," I said absentmindedly, watching Mor having a silent conversation with Azriel through her eyes, "but, I came here for a mission." I looked to Rhysand who gazed back at me with the same intensity. My mirror image. "I suggest you all get some serious rest. We have a mate to save, who just so happens to be my High Lady."

Rhys' eyes flared at my recognition of her title. No matter how I may have avoided this world before, I was here now, and there was no going back. 

I am Princess of the Night Court, and it's time for the world to know I am lost no longer.

🌌

author's notes;

even after changing the fuckin schedule, im still safe. however it's safe to say that after this chapter, things will pick up

i know it's been dragging on

with that being said, this is basically a filler :(

questions:

Is Cassian's anger justified?

What do think is running through Rhysand's head at the moment?

Do think Eralyn's actions are justified?

ㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡㅡ

SO BIG NEWS:

votes have been put in and it has been decided who eralyn will end up with

im pretty sure most of you already know who it is, so comment who think (i want to see your guesses!), but know that the decision has already been made.

have a great rest of your day/night!

bye lovelies!

author Kim

IVE GONE BLONDE BY THE WAY SKSKSK