god is a woman (arthur shelby.)

nineteen.

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It had been a few weeks since the London incident, and so much had changed. Tommy had been beaten unconscious and had his own tooth ripped out by Darby Sabini for visiting his club unauthorised, only to then be saved by Chester Campbell in a wild turn of events. Despite the problems Tommy had suffered, there was equally a more pressing issue in the Peaky Blinders that no one dared to address.

Rowan and Arthur had fallen down an ugly rabbit hole, one that was both endangering their relationship and their own lives. They had accumulated a nasty preference for cocaine, much more serious than what happened at the party. They were both also pushing each other to the limit by winding each other up and seeing how long it would be before the other exploded. Rowan would flirt with every man and woman as far as the eye could see, just to get some form of reaction out of Arthur. Arthur would get increasingly angry and violent in the boxing ring, just to provoke a reaction out of Rowan. The pair were on a downwards spiral into a mess of nothingness, but there was nothing anyone could do to stop it.

Arthur had gone too far this time.

Rowan stood outside Tommy's office, arms folded and glaring at the accountants in the betting den that had wolf whistled her on the way in. She felt like a schoolgirl that had been caught teasing one of the younger kids and had subsequently been ordered to the head's office.

"Oi." She heard the door fling open and Tommy flicked her on the shoulder to summon her in.

Rowan entered the room sheepishly and shut the door behind her.

"So." Tommy paced the room nervously. "Tell me what happened."

Rowan looked down to see an uncomfortable looking Finn and Isaiah, who were shifting anxiously in their seats.

"The kid was weak. Arthur caught him at the wrong angle and knocked him out." She explained emotionlessly.

It was all a lie. No one saw exactly what started it all, as Rowan and the referee were busy encouraging Finn and Isaiah to see what Arthur was doing to the boy half his age. It was the sound of bones cracking that caught their attention, and as they all peered over the divider, the sight sickened them all to their stomachs.

Arthur was a merciless killing machine. He was so blinded by his anger that he couldn't see that the boy was no longer fighting back, and that he was no longer breathing. The sawdust underneath the young boy's body had turned coral with the amount of blood that had seeped into it.

Two of the burlier men at the boxing club pulled Arthur away from him, whilst Rowan and the ref checked for the boy's pulse. Nothing. Blood was caked upon his face, and his hazel eyes were still wide open with fear, the last thing he saw being Arthur beating him senseless. Rowan closed the young boy's eyes for him, and pecked him on the forehead as she apologised.

"Don't fucking lie to me." Tommy bellowed, knocking all his papers off his desk.

"Boys, go and wait outside, yeah?" Rowan offered a warming smile to Finn and Isaiah, who had flinched noticeably at Tommy's outburst. The two boys slinked off as quietly as they could, leaving Rowan and Tommy alone.

Tommy continued to pace before taking a deep breath and running his hands over his face.

"Tell me what he was like this morning." Tommy asked and sat down on the chair Finn had been on.

"He was in a shitty mood, but I didn't think anything of it. It was hot last night, I thought that maybe he didn't sleep well." She lied again. The two were up until three having sex and taking drugs. "He didn't say much but he kissed me goodbye and told me he'd meet me after my shift. When I got there, I tried approaching him between his fights but it was like he couldn't see me, he didn't even look at me."

"Finn says he's been blowing a lot lately." Tommy mused. "You noticed anything?"

"Perhaps a little. I only see him when he comes home, and even then he spends most of his time asleep." She revealed. "It's not like I'm his girlfriend or anything, so I don't know what to say."

The two remained in silence as they both considered how to handle the permanently on the edge Arthur. He was like a piece of cooking meat, getting hotter and hotter before he would start to spit out. It was taking even less to wind him up before he would snap.

"He caught my eye one time the whole time I was at the ring. It was as he was being restrained, and I'd closed the poor sod's eyes as we realised he was dead. I've never seen that look in his eyes before Tom." Rowan admitted, her voice tainted with fear. Tommy stared at her in empathy, seeing how frightened of her own lover she was becoming. "It was like he'd been possessed by the devil. His eyes changed colour, his muscles were clenched and he kept screaming and clutching his ears as if they hurt."

"He used to do that in France." Tommy slowly sighed. "Sometimes in the middle of the night he'd start screaming and pulling his own hair. It was always worse after a bad raid."

"Then why is he like this now?" She asked rhetorically.

"Cocaine is one hell of a drug Rowan." Tommy laughed bitterly and stood up, collecting his papers off the floor.

"What are you trying to say?" She asked defensively, her arms folded once more.

"Surely, doing three or four lines a night can't be doing any good for his brain, nor yours for that matter." Tommy talked without any feeling in his words.

"I haven't made him into this monster. You said it yourself, he was like this in France." She spoke in disgust and headed for the door.

"I'm just saying, Rowan. He's been in a bad way for many years now. He doesn't need you and your penchants for stimulants fucking him over once more." Tommy watched her never turn to look at him as she grabbed the door handle and flung the door open into the betting den.

"You're a godamn fucking prick Thomas Shelby. A gobshite to the highest degree."

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a/n: this heatwave has done nothing for my skin as i'm so burnt but i've never been so productive with writing in all my life x