Never the Same

Chapter 19

I can't get out of the courtroom quick enough. Even just standing outside the courtroom isn't giving me the space I so desperately need. I catch Jones and Carlo standing off to the side watching me closely and signal for one of them to walk me outside so I can get some air. Jones makes a move to walk me out but Carlo stops him with a hand pressing on his chest. Jones says nothing and steps back to where he was and Carlo walks with me.

I'm still fanning my face with my hand when we get outside and Carlo walks me off to the side to stand out of sight behind one of the pillars. He stands with his back to me, watching the photographers who are now being held back with barriers and police at the bottom of the steps. I pace back and forth and shake my head, trying my hardest to make sense of what the hell just happened.

I knew those voicemails were going to be used as evidence in Nadia's favour to win the case but I didn't think they'd be used straight off the bat. I thought we would have had some time to build up to them but clearly not. Up until this point, I had completely forgotten what I said in those voicemails. I knew a couple would be filled with anger but hearing everything after all this time . . . I can see that I didn't handle our break up all that well.

The way I spoke made it seem like I was pinning for Luca, which I guess I kind of was at the time. It was a time in my life that I needed to have the answers to everything in order to under what it was that was happening because everything happened so quickly.

"Kaylee."

I look over my shoulder at the sound of Luca's voice calling to me. He walks to me with Jones following closely before coming to a stop next to me. Jones stands next to Carlo and Luca breathes deeply now we're partially concealed from prying eyes.

"Talk to me," he urges.

"I'm fine," I lie.

"You might be able to fool most people but this is me you're talking to. What's-"

"Nothing," I cut off.

"Kaylee, please."

"I don't know!" I snap, facing him more directly. "Maybe it's the fact that I just witnessed Nadia's lawyer break your mum's untouchable demeanour then before I knew it, he did the same thing to me. I mean, he practically called me a gold digger in front of every goddamn person in that courtroom and don't even get me started on those bloody voicemails!"

Luca blinks and looks down at the ground.

He wasn't expecting my outburst but I can't take holding in those thoughts for a second longer. I needed to get that off my chest and now I have, it's left me feeling vulnerable. Bill's hurtful words have gotten to me in a way Calvin's nastiness didn't when he questioned me last night.

"Is that how I'm being portrayed as to outsiders? Is that how people see me since they found out we used to date before you became rich? Is that how you see me?"

"No, Kaylee." He says straightaway. He closes the gap between us and rests his hands on my shoulders. "Never once have I seen you in that kind of light. I've loved you since the day I met you and I loved you even when we broke up. I still loved you when met again in August and if it's possible, I love you more and more every day I'm with you."

"That's not how everyone in there sees it," I mutter, tears forming in my eyes.

"And who gives a fuck about what they think? I don't and I hope you don't either. This is all Nadia's doing and this is what I was afraid of happening. You're starting to question us and that's exactly what she wants you to do."

"I want to believe you, Luca. I really do but there's so much happening in my head that I can't make sense of what's right and what's wrong."

He nods and embraces me in a tight hug. "I know it's a lot but just remember that I love you and that will never change."