Don't wave me good bye (cash/nameron) boyxboy

Chapter 41

Nash POV (I suggest you to hear 'i'm not the only one' by sam smith)

I could feel the wind rushing softly through my opposite direction. Brushing my tears away. All i could feel right now is pain.. The sound of him, running on my head over and over again

Dangerous it's dangerous for me..and it's getting more more more and more complicated. Loving him it's easy for me..but getting him 100 percent it's the hardest thing that i'm going to do..

Now i'm here walking alone, to find a way home. I'm still shocked and can't believe what just happened. It breaks my heart into a million little pieces. I really don't know what to do..it just hurts.. So hurts than i thought

Tears streaming down my face, remembering what he told her. What the actually happened. What the most important thing is.

The hardest thing is when he told sweet nothing to me, but he did that to the others too. I can't be angry with him..and i don't know why..considering that she is sick laying on the hospital bed.

Should i turn around? Or keep going?? Difficult for me to choose..I still love him..i really do.. I just want to flashback everything and fix everything up..

The truth of loosing him on your back it hurts than the truth of loosing him in front of you. The truth of being the second choice..it's painful. When someone is weaker than you..she's gonna get it..because he knows that she's weak..and he wants to fix her..while i'm here standing..thinking of him.

I made it, in front of our house. I walk inside and shut it slowly. Headed to my room and locked it.

"Why am i so stupid?.." I asked myself

"But i love him, so much.." I said

I have to admit that i can't denying this..denying the tears that fell for him..denying all the lies to make me happy..

And there it is. A knock on my door..i bet it's shawn...

"Hey buddy.." He sighed looking at me sadly

"Hey shawn..come in.." I said and let him into my room. He led me to my bed and smile

"Nash what happened?? Tell me.."

"It hurts.." I whispered "i wish this would be over now, but i know i still need him.."

"Nash..what's going on.." He asked holding my hand

"I can't do anything shawn.." I said "i love him so much.. But why he did this to me?? Am i not enough for him?"

"Nash what are you talking about.." He asked

"I'm tired, but i can't do anything shawn.. She's alone and sick right now, she loves cameron so much, she needs cam..her parents died, and she doesn't have anybody.."

"Who do you mean??" He asked frowning

"I'm not enough for him.." I muttered looking at my shoes "i know that he still loves her too..she's one of his bestfriend.. I can't be angry or protest.."

"You know what..i should just be bestfriend with him, nothing more.." I said "maybe..i should just let him be with her.."

"Nash what are you talking about.." He asked worried

"I can't let him go, i can't shawn..i'm so love him..i'm trying to fight, but i can't.." I said whispering "not now, not tomorrow, not even next year.. I will never ever be ready for it.."

"Nash.."

Flashback

Looking at them, hurts me so bad.. But i can't do anything about it..all i can do is watching them, together..

"Cameron" she cried "i love you so much..

"I-i love you too shein, so much.." Cameron said

"That's amazing.." She smiled widely

"I know.." He smiled back "you should take a rest beautiful"

"Yes i will.." She said "but please stay with me.."

"I will i will.." He said "go to sleep..now"

"You're amazing.." She said "please don't leave me alone here.."

"Don't worry i'll wait for you.." He said

"Y-you're not breaking up with me..?" She asked

"No..i'm not..i love you, you're my bestfriend and i want to make u happy as always shein..i know that u need me" he said "bestfriend love.."

That hurts..

"C-cameron, thankyou so much.." She said crying "i don't know what i'm going to do without you.."

"I will make u better, okay??" He asked

He leaned in, slowly rotate his head..smiling, kissing her lips slowly..

My heart beats fast, my heart slowly breaking apart, a thousand knife stab me from behind..that's what i feel

That should be me, that should be me feeling his kiss..

"What about me.." I said to myself crying..soundly

"I love you cameron.." she whispered

"I love you too sheina.." He said back

"I'll stay.." He said as he pulled away

"And i will wait for you to get better shein..you're my bestfriend.."

--------------------------

"And now i just don't know who i am anymore shawn" i said laughing sarcastically "what about me??"

"Nash, i-i just can't believe it.." He said "why he did that to you.." He looked at me disbelief and disappointed on his eyes

"I don't know shawn..i don't know" i said "i wished i know why.."

"But nash, he loves you..so much..he really do nash..i could see it.."

"No, shawn you don't understand what it is.."

"W-what.." He looked at me frowning

"Shawn" i said "u should understand that.."

"i'm not the only one"

---to be continued---

Tadatdatatattaatatta lol sorry i'm so late..amd it's because of the exam..

BAD BAD BAD I KNOWWW AND I'm SOWWYYYY but i'll make it better don't worry! Should i continue????????????????? Tell me!

BUT GUYS GOOD NEWS BECAUSE I ALMOST DONE WITH MY EXAM.. And that means!!! That i can post moree like everydayy!! I wished!! Well amen!

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xx andrea🌞🌞🌞