Rough Road Ahead (In Progress)

Chapter 21

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            Melting down the gold proved to be rather easy, my father did it in one night and then put it in different molds of various things. He made one horse figurine and another cow one and then a bracelet before heading to the jewelers the next morning and getting the 100 thousand dollars for it.

            While he was out I hoped into my car and headed to the store. Seeing as I had thrown out my entire bedroom, I needed to buy some new stuff. I started with the paint color. Pink no longer resembled me, so I went with a dark blue that almost looked black. It reminded me of Brad's hair color and for some reason that made me like the color more.

            I also picked up some new bed sheets, but looking through the section it seemed hard to find anything that I liked. My eyes automatically went to seek out the pink, but my heart no longer suited it. My eyes landed on a green blanket that had a huge flower pattern covering it and on the reverse side was entirely black. I smiled picking it up and throwing it in my cart.

            Heading to the clothes section I looked through some new shirts and pants, wanting a change. TNA pants and tank tops no longer suited me. It made me think of everything that had happened, and that was the last thing I wanted to think about. I wanted something different.

            "What do you think will look good on me?" I asked one of the girls wearing a Big Box Clothes T-shirt.

            The girl smiled at me. She was on the heavy side, but I could tell she had fashion sense. Her clothes looked put together, neat, like someone who really had their life sorted out. "You honey need jeans, some tight jeans." She started, then asked me to follow her. She walked right to the t-shirts and pants and started showing me different outfits. By the time that she was done, I had a cart over flowing with clothes. I thanked her, walking to the cash and loaded my clothes onto the counter.

            It felt so strange to have some originality in my wardrobe, to actually have to think about what I was going to wear in the morning. Somehow, that thought no longer scared me. Maybe it was because now I knew what real fear was. I felt stronger because of it. Little did I know, I was going to need all the strength I could get in the coming days.

            I packed up my car, driving home and then unpacked them inside the house. No one seemed to be up yet. It was the weekend, so like usual everyone was sleeping in until after three. So, no one helped me as I carried in my many bags. My closet had been almost empty before that day, but after I had hung everything off and removed the many tags, stashing them away in the trash can, it was completely full.

            My bank card wasn't doing too well either, but I had had a job the summer earlier and made a pretty decent amount of cash. Seeing as I liked saving my money, I hadn't spent a cent.

            Once I was inside I threw down some plastic sheets and started painting. It took a full three hours but after I was done and cleaned myself and the area up, it felt more like home. The dark blue looked good with the white ceiling and my new self image.

             I threw out all my old clothes. None were special to me as it was, so it wasn't hard. I even threw out the clothes on my back, taking off both my bra and underwear before pulling out a fresh set and looking through my clothes trying to pick out something special to me. I finally picked out a white dress the was form fitted and had a small black belt at the waist. Looking at myself in the mirror once and putting on a thin layer of makeup with cat eyes I was done. Walking out I felt empowered.