Who's Fault?

Chapter Twenty-Two

My last night of work the next day we were extremely slow. It got me thinking... I'm gonna miss this place. A lot. Yeah, it was shitty a lot of the time, because of how often people called out or didn't show, but it was like my home away from home. I was just hoping I'd be able to return someday. Max came by close to closing to pick me up. He ordered his food and I was able to sit down and chat with him for a few minutes. When I was through with my shift, my colleagues wished me good luck and most said they wished to see me soon.

The ride home was quiet. Only broken once by Max, "you okay?"

I just shrugged in response. It was a good question; one I really didn't know the answer to. It sucked that I had to leave the one steady thing I've had in my life—having worked there since I was sixteen—but at the same time it was for the best reason I could think of. At least I left of my own accord and they didn't fire me.

By the time we got home, I was extremely worn out. I became more and more exhausted with each day that went by. But hopefully I could focus more on relaxing and preparing my home for my little girl. Somethings I'd already ordered for her, but they wouldn't get here for a few weeks. Max had been helping me baby proof the house; he thought it was too soon, but I couldn't convince myself to sit around and do nothing with all the anticipation and anxiety building up. It also helped me take my mind off of things. Keeping busy was one of the only things that was helping me stay sane. Once Max noticed me getting up and into things and rearranging, he usually would roll his eyes and shake his head before coming around to help me.

However, I wasn't up for any kind of preparation that night. I was exhausted and just needed sleep. It was still hard to come by, but I had been making an effort to get any amount of sleep that I could. So when we got home, I laid down and tried to relax.

"Babe, look!" I all but squealed. Jordan had taken me to the fair for a date night. The sun had already set and I loved being among the lights of the event. I pointed towards the giant Ferris wheel that seemed like it hadn't been moving at all, but in reality it was just moving super slow. "Can we go on it? Please?" I begged. I loved Ferris wheels. I loved being at the highest point of them and looking out as far as my eyes would let me see in every direction.

He thought for a minute before nodding, "sure."

I had been noticing these small changes in Jordan's behavior for a couple weeks now. He was more distant, quiet. When he did talk, it was in short replies and almost rude. I thought he was just going through a rough patch and made sure he knew that if he ever needed or wanted someone to talk to, I was there for him. It didn't change anything though. Whatever was going on, he was going through it in solitude. I was beginning to think it was something I'd done or said. So when he came to my house all excited about the fair and asked me if I wanted to go, I didn't think twice about it.

His short reply reminded me of the situation, but I forced it out of my head and jumped in place from excitement. Things are getting better. I grabbed hold of his hand and rushed to get in line. When it was finally our turn, I hopped in to the enclosed gondola first as Jordan paid. He quietly joined me, sitting next to me and wrapping an arm around my waist. I eagerly waited until we got to the top. I could barely sit still, I was so thrilled.

When we were at the very top, I had stood up next to the full length of the window, so I could get a clear view of everything. Jordan came up behind me and pulled me close to him. Closer than he had in a while. I relaxed in to his hold, embracing his return to normal. It was as if Jordan had his first moment of clarity since things started to change. "I love you, Wrennie. You know that, right?"

"I love you too, J. More than anything." I replied, turning around in his grasp. I reached up to kiss him and he immediately deepened it, I could feel the love he felt being poured into the kiss.