People always say your first love is special. Mine was too, well at least until he left and I never saw him again. I still think about him every now and then, even though I have a family now with a loving husband and three beautiful daughters. That time probably will be special to me till the the day I die. This is my story
"Lexi come on, we'll be late for the party" my sister shouted from downstairs. "One minute I'm almost finished" I shouted back then checking my reflection for one final time I hurried downstairs and out the front door after grabbing my purse. Me and my sister got into her car and she backed her car out of the driveway and started driving down the road In ten minutes we reached the party, thankfully in time and entered the club. It was dimly lit by a few small colorful lamps adn a disco ball. Everyone there was dressed very sexily, some guys had even opened up their shirts. My sister Andra had immediately gone to join her friends leaving me alone. I nervously approached the bar at one end . Just as I was about to ask for a drink a voice next to me said "Jaxon give this pretty young lady a glass of cherry schnapps and get me your strongest red." I turned to look at the voice and was shocked. This guy had godlike looks, jet black hair with lightly tanned skin and the most mesmerizing pair of golden brown eyes. He was the few people here casually dressed in a pair of pale blue grey jeans and a black t-shirt and grey hoodie. The bartender put down our drinks but i was too mesmerized by the guy to notice. He took a glance at me and smirked "Like what you see darling" "darling you ain't all that special" i gave him a once over "I've seen better" I shot. At this he appeared shocked for a moment, then burst out laughing and said "Darling, so you aren't all sweet like sugar, you have a bit of spice to you too. You, my dear have a misleading appearance, but do tell me more about yourself".
We continued talking it this way and exchanged numbers, making plans to see each other tomorrow. Our friendship grew steadily until the day when he decided to turn it into something more.
I was completing some work when my phone rang suddenly and the name Xander appeared on the screen. I picked it up and a drunken voice spoke, "Lex, is that you, god can you please come to my place quick, please, come as fast as you can". This was followed by a beeping noise. I blankly stared at the phone for a few long moments then quickly changed into something more sensible. Then I hurried down and out of the door to my car. I drove to his place using the most short route I knew. When I reached, I immediately hurried up the stairs to his apartment. I started banging on the door. A few moments later the door flew open and strong arms engulfed me in a hug pulling me close to a large, warm body. "Oh Lex thank goodness you came. I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't. " Xander slurred drunkenly. I smiled but immediately pushed him off and went inside to make some sobering tea. After he drank it he turned to face me with a serious look on his face and said"God Lex what is happening to me, it's like for the past few days whenever i'm around you or thinking of you I feel so out of control, I mean at first I was fine as friends but now I want something more between us. So... Alexa Ryan Grey will you be my girlfriend." Shocked, I stood stunned for a few moments the jumped into his arms saying yes over and over again.
From that moment he and I had a great change in relationship and even though for a while it was a bit awkward between us the tension between us settled and we grew even closer, though now in a romantic way. Honestly I had sometimes then felt like those times were never going to end but all things have an ending just like they have a beginning. Our end came in a very painful way, one that mad my heart shatter into tiny splinter like pieces, shards so thin I thought they would never be repaired.
I knocked on the door to his apartment continuously for a minute when finally an unfamiliar man opened the door, "Umm I am here to meet Xander Night so can you call him out please. I am his girlfriend Alexa Grey. " The man's eye flashed with realization and he went inside and brought me a letter and handed it to me. "he doesn't live here anymore and he didn't leave any address either. He did however leave this letter and informed us to give it to you when you came." I quickly tore open the envelope and read the sheet of paper inside it. When I finished reading, my eyes filled with tears and my knees weakened causing me to kneel. I covered my face with my hands and cried until I felt my eyes become puffy and red.
I still have the letter with me and I often reread in hopes that I will understand why he did what he did. The question, Why? constantly lingers with me but I can never understand what motivated him to write that painful, sad heartbreaking letter but I probably never will. I hoped that our end could at least have been less painful and sad. If I ever saw him again I would ask him, why ?
