At World's Beginning

As One Door Closes...

"It's too late to earn my forgiveness."

Even now, after all that had transpired and all the hurts and injuries he had accumulated, she could wound him far deeper with words than any edged steel ever had.

"I had nothing to do with your father's death."

Regardless, he should have prevented it. He knew that, and his next words reflected it.

"But that does not absolve me of my other sins."

And they were many in the counting. More than could warrant forgiveness. Or redemption, for that matter.

"Come with us."

Those three simple words ignited a flame of hope he dared not warm himself with. Her eyes could almost make him believe.

"James, come with me."

Do not make me dare to hope, he thought, heart pounding painfully in his chest. Do not be so cruel as to allow me to believe you ever cared for me the way I care for you.

But his traitorous heart made him believe, for an instant, that Elizabeth was asking because she could not bear to leave him behind. That there was a small part of her that truly wished for him to leave the ship, leave this empty life behind, and go with her into her world of lawless freedom.

"Who goes there!"

James pulled Elizabeth behind him and craned his head upwards, drawing his sword as he met eyes with the cursed sailor who had shouted the warning. He watched for a few seconds more and then vanished.

They were out of time.

"Go. I will follow."

"You're lying."

Of course he was. If it was the only way to get her off the Dutchman, he would tell a thousand lies. Skew a thousand truths. He just wanted her to go. But she wouldn't. The one time James wanted her dispassion and disinterest, she would not grant it to him.

James turned to the woman he had once wanted more than any honor, any commission, any damned medal or title. His heart weighed with the sorrow and the guilt that were the culminations of his actions. If he had not made so many errors and lapses in judgement, if he had lived a more honest life... would she have looked at him like this much sooner? Would they have ever had a chance?

She stared back at him, molten brown eyes in the dark, willing him to come with her. Silently pleading he would listen.

Why? he wondered morosely. Why do you look at me that way now, when it is far too late?

"Our destinies have been entwined, Elizabeth," he intoned softly as he stared deep into those wide eyes. "...but never joined."

He did then the one thing he had never been brave enough to attempt before. Too bound by propriety and chained by decorum.

James leaned forward and captured her lips in a kiss. It was a bittersweet thing, more bitter than sweet as its only purpose was to say farewell. He sensed his time was running short, and he was afraid, so afraid, and maybe this way... this way, a piece of him would go with her.

He pulled away and studied her face as if memorizing lines on a map—the shape of its slopes and curves, committing to memory the dark waters of her eyes. Elizabeth couldn't seem to look away, as if she was seeing him clearly for the first time. Perhaps, she was.

"Go, now," he ordered her, facing back toward the ship where he knew reinforcements would be coming any moment. For a moment he heard no movement from her, and he wondered if she would simply refuse to leave without him. But then he heard her climb onto the railing and then onto the rope, and something within him relaxed.