**// Part 2
♪ You flunk from medication ‘cuz it only cause is pain. You walk up to the doctor who keeps calling you insane. You’re lost even when you’re going the right way. ♪
Some things are right for us, but wrong for the perspective of others. That no matter what goodness we do, others will criticize and will make a fault out of it. They turn truths into twisted lies. They make innocent be guilty of charge.
Good people have their own way of hurting people. No matter how hard they try to avoid it, they still do it subconsciously. It’s annoying how they could be so generous even at the times they should be selfish. They put others before them. And they them blame afterwards.
Life is good as they say. Is that also the reason why they also say that life is unfair? Everyone has their own kind of problems. Some may be insignificant, some may mean the world. Problems come to make us tougher, stronger, stiffer, and prepared. But what if those problems hurt so much that it already makes us feel numb? Is there a way to undo the numbness? Is there a way to forget the problems and feel a little happy even for a little while?
**//
Pinunasan ko ang pawis ko at umupo sa bench habang pinapanood ko ang ibang taong masayang naglalakad sa park. They all seem oblivious to the fact na after happiness comes sadness.
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes for a little while. Nakakainis. Bakit ba hindi ko man lang magawang maging happy even for a little while? They say I deserve to have some happiness in life, pero bakit ba puro nalang pain and problems and nararamdaman ko? It all started kanina at school. At magmula roon, nagdire-diretso na sya.
Life hates me. Obvious na obvious naman. Kahit saan ako mapadpad, wala talaga. Life hates me too much. School, sa di sinasadyang rason, nag-away kami ni Aril so I decided to cut class and go home. But when I got home, iba naman ang nag-aaway. Sina Mama at Papa naman. Well, expected ko na yung sa kanila because those fights and arguments has been going on for more six years. Kaya di na rin ako magtataka na one day uuwi ako ng bahay ng walang tao, walang nagsisigawan. May maiiwan lang na note na ako na muna bahala sa sarili ko and whatsoever dahil they needed a “break” kuno at kung ano pang mga excuse.
Upon arriving at home, yun nga, bumati sakin ang napaka-gandang batuhan nila Mama at Papa ng masasakit na salita sa isa’t-isa. They didn’t even bother to greet me. Basta tuloy ang pag-aaway. Hindi ko na din binother na batiin sila. Baka sakin pa nila ibuntong ang galit nila kaya I went straightly to my bed room and changed my clothes. Pupunta nalang muna ako sa park.
At nandito na nga ako sa park, nagmumuni-muni. Ewan ko kung ano yung iniisip ko pero yun ang lagi kong sinasabi kapag nagpupunta ako sa park. Magmumuni-muni lang muna, magpapahangin, magjojogging... Pero yun nga ba yung mga reason kung bakit ako nandito? Or baka naman ito lang talaga yung takbuhan ko? Yung para bang safe place ko.
“Mag-isa ka miss?” A voice asked, nakapikit pa rin ang mga mata ko at bahagyang nakatungo. Tumango ako ng kaunti but said nothing so he went on, “Pwede tumabi sayo?”
I laughed, pero not to hard. Para nag-giggle lang of some sort. “Why? I don’t own this chair and so do you. No need to ask permission.” I said. I opened my eyes and turned to him. Oo, him! Meron pa palang lalaki na hindi takot tumabi sakin? Emgi.
“Ah, sabi ko nga. Thanks.” And with that, he sat beside me. Tumingin sya sakin at nahuli nya akong nakatingin sa kanya. I looked away. Hindi dahil sa awkward, but because he reminds me of someone.
“So why were you crying?” He asked suddenly. Was he talking to me? Ako ba yung tinatanong nya kung bakit umiiyak? Hindi naman ako umiiyak diba? Nga ba?
