My Remedy [S.M.]

01

Alessandra

My senior year couldn't have arrived quick enough. I've impatiently anticipated for this year to come since freshman year but now that the moment is here, I wish for a do over. Not feeling fully prepared for what the real world has to offer. . .yet.

"First day of school of your last day of senior year. How are you feeling?" My mother questioned, while rinsing out her mug after having her second cup of coffee this morning. "Um, I'm honestly not sure." I lie, not wanting dwell on an entire conversation on why I don't feel prepared for life after high school. Knowing my mother, she'll play victim and scold me by saying, "I didn't have anyone growing up, you have an entire support system." But it's just not that simple.

"Oh remember to submit your essays to John Hopkins and University of Pennsylvania." She plants a warm kiss onto my forehead before attending to my younger siblings, mentally screaming knowing that going to an Ivy League school was not my plan after high school. I want to start somewhere small, like community college then transfer my credits to Spelman College or Clark Atlanta.

For some odd reason, my mother had a fascination with Ivy Leagues as if she attended one. She started off at community then transferred to Georgia State where she earned her Biology degree. Then went on to complete her residency, now she's a successful Cardiologist at Athens main hospital.

I mean there's nothing wrong with my mothers academic career. If anything I'm trying to following in her footsteps, minus becoming a doctor. I don't have the brains or mental capacity to do what she does.

"Well I should get going," I quickly climb down from the bar stool, making swift movements toward the sink to avoid anymore short talk from my mother. "I love you."

I loved my mother wholeheartedly but at times she can be very overbearing. I understand that she only wants what's best for me. But at times mother comes off as aggressive, controlling over me and my siblings lives. She controlled everything- from I what I consume into my body to who I associate with.

I successfully find a parking spot in the student section, turning off the ignition, I grab my book bag from the backseat of my car before getting out. Walking towards the entrance of worn and deteriorated high school- Spring Leaf High School. Letting out a hard sigh, placing my hand on one of the semi-rusted silver door handles. Opening the door, making headway through the large student body instantly spotting out the frantic freshman. I can't help but chuckle, it felt just like yesterday I was in their shoes.

Finding the same locker I accompanied for the last three years. Unlocking the narrow baby blue metal door, hanging up my book bag onto one of the hangers. Taking out two notebooks and a black pen to start my day with. Knowing that I probably won't even open my notebook, just in case there's anything important to write down. I liked to stay on top of my studies and ahead of any academic work.

Before I could close my locker door, feeling a pair of cold hands engulf my vision. "Guess who?" Excitement fills Rylyn voice, I haven't seen my best friend in a couple of weeks due to a family vacation, "Um, I don't know," Tapping my mouth with my index finger as my lips slowly form a smile.

Rylyn releases her hands from around my eyes, "I missed you so much!" She sequels, embracing me into a warm hug.

"I have so much to tell you," Rylyn smiles brightly while tightly squeezing my hands. Telling by her expression, I already knew she had a great time in Miami. "but first we have to go to the senior meeting before first period." Rylyn interlocks arms with mine, taking the lead toward gymnasium.

Rylyn and I quickly find a seat next to former classmates- Jessica and Dylan. Receiving a warm greeting smile, conversation sparked between the four of us immediately. "Are you going to the party this Saturday?" Jessica questions Rylyn, her eyes searching for Rylyn to confirm so that she could tag along.

"Hmm, only if Alessandra goes." She looks at her me with those damn puppy dog eyes, my eyes widen in realization at the sudden invite. "Oh no, I'm busy."

"It's first week of school." Jessica cocks her heads to the side and her brown/green eyes literally staring into my soul. "Um, I don't know guys. . .who's hosting it?" I question, immediately feeling fear and uneasiness overtake my voice.

"Oh um, it's at University of Georgia. . .so who fucking knows," Rylyn answers, "besides you'll be with Dylan, Jessica, and I. It'll be our first party of senior year, have a little bit of fun." She clasp her hands together waiting for my approval.

"Fine," the two girls giggle while gathering hands together, "only if you two come by and concoct a story of come sort."

"Just say you're staying the night." Rylyn shrugs her shoulders.

"Ok, I'll think of something." I mutter feeling a little bit of mix emotions.

"It'll be fine, I'll stay the night too." Jessica smiles, turning her attention towards our principal who finally took the podium stand. "Sorry, we were having some technical problems but now we shall start. Congratulations class of two thousand and twenty, I'm proud of who you've become and who your all going to become. . . ."