I sit in the living room of my dad's house, my eyes puffy from crying so much. The funeral was yesterday, and it rained all day, as if she was crying with us. My long auburn locks are in loose curls, twisting down to the small of my back. I hear footsteps coming from the hallway and I brush my tears away, looking up at my dad who has the drunken haze over his eyes. I sigh, standing up and helping him walk to the couch. Once he sits down, I walk to the kitchen and get him a water bottle from the fridge. I toss it at him and watch as he opens it up, chugging the fluid inside. "You need to slow down." I tell him, getting more and more angry with his coping mechanism.
He mumbles something to me and I shake my head as I begin to wash dishes from lunch. I dry them off and put them away in the cupboards, making sure that the kitchen is nice and tidy. "She was my everything." My dad tells me, the first thing he's said about her since her sudden death. I stop in my tracks and turn around, looking back at him. "We were together for more than half of our lives. I met her in high-school, Grade 10. She just moved from Canada, and god damnit, she was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. We got married when we were twenty, and then we had you. She was so damn happy about your red hair, always rubbin' it in my face that you got her traits over mine. You have her nose and eyes, but my freckles and jaw-line." He continues to tell me.
I feel a tear slide down my face and I walk over to him, sitting on the couch beside him as he stares at their wedding photo that hangs above the flat-screen television. "We tried after you, she had a miscarriage. Two of them. I remember her crying to me, saying that it's karma for us running away from our small town and moving here without saying anything to our parents. She started praying lots, going to church all the time and then eventually began working at St. Thomas as a nurse. She loved it; helping people ya' know. She would always come home upset if someone passed or if something didn't work out. She would come home puffy eyed and then she'd see you and it was like everything was okay again. She'd play dolls with you, go to the park or something."
I continue crying as he reminisces on their time together. He isn't usually an emotional man, so this is huge. I can't say I expected him to say much about mom, especially in this way. "Then you grew up, went to school and became friends with those two damn boys, Jax and Ope. Good guys, they always looked after you. I remember you came home one day with a broken nose and your mother just about lost it. Pulled me into the bedroom after her shift at the hospital and flipped shit, said that her baby-girl is going to join a damn fighting club because of these boys. You remember that day?"
I chuckle, nodding. Remembering how angry my mom was at my broken nose because I got into a fist fight with Tara Knowles because we found out she dumped Jax for some other guy. Jax and Ope were three years older than me, and always got me in trouble whether it was fighting, or smoking weed behind the school during lunch period. Everything was so simple back then, so easy. "I fought Tara Knowles 'cause of Jax." I tell him, and he nods, letting out a laugh.
"You busted her lip open so badly and your mom had to stitch it up. She said it was her karma for having such a rowdy daughter, but you always stood your guard and protected those that you loved. You and your momma were alike in that way. You'd fight viciously in order to ensure the safety of those who have a place in here." He said, tapping the spot on his chest where his heart laid. "But you got your fighting skills from me, your momma never fought. She was too chicken shit." He teases her, looking over at me and smirking. He brushes a curl behind my ear, "You look just like her, Faith. You're a damn spitting image of her." Tears begin to form in his eyes as he analyzes the shared features between my mother and I. "She'd be so proud of you, Faith Ray. She was so proud of you." He tells me, reaching for my hand and holding it tightly as we both silently cried together. "Told me that you were going to make the best mum one day, that you had so much love to give someone. When you and Rick broke up, she was livid. Not at you, but at him. Said you always deserved better and he was just a pretty face."
