Nightingale's Song (My MCU #3)

Chapter 3

Anna was up hours before her shift. The Howling Commandos were leaving on a mission and she wasn't about to let her fiancé go without taking the chance to tell him goodbye.

She walked into the room where they were making their final preparations. Buck was on the far side of the room talking to Steve. One hand was fisted on his hip and the other hooked around the back of his neck. His back was turned toward her and she took the opportunity to just watch him. Her soldier. A small smile graced her features as she watched the way he moved as he talked.

Steve's gaze fell on her and he grinned before nudging Bucky and motioning in her direction. When he turned, his look of confusion was quickly replaced with a smile. He hurried across the floor to her without a word to Steve. "What are you doing here? I told you to sleep in."

"You think I'm going to let you escape without saying goodbye to me, Barnes? You're not that lucky," she teased.

His hands settled on her waist as he chuckled. "Yeah, 'cause it's a real hardship to get to see you before we leave."

Anna laid her head on his chest, her palm flat against his heart. "I'm going to miss you, Sargent."

He ran his thumbs back and forth in a comforting gesture. "I'll miss you, too, Nightingale. But I'll be back before you know it."

She tilted her head to peer up at him. "You promise?"

He gave her that cockeyed grin she so adored. "I'll always come back to you, doll. And always as quickly as possible. You'll be sick of me before you know it."

She smiled back, ignoring the uneasy feeling in her stomach. Stretching, she pressed her lips against his. "I love you, James Buchanan Barnes."

"I love you." They held each other for a while longer until a throat clearing caught their attention. As they separated they realized they were alone in the room save for Steve.

The Captain gave them an apologetic smile. "Sorry, Buck. We have to go."

Anna stepped back. "You bring him back to me, Captain."

"Wouldn't dream of doing otherwise," he responded with a grin.

After Bucky placed one last kiss to her temple, Anna watched the two men leave as she twisted the ring on her finger.

***

It had been several days since the Commandos had left on their mission. Anna had learned early not to worry. There was no telling how long they'd be gone. It was often difficult for them to stay in contact so it wasn't unusual for them to return suddenly with no warning.

An allied transport had been hit by some sort of explosive and the survivors brought to the facilities where Anna was stationed. At the moment she was elbow deep in blood and was doing her best to heal what she could without raising too much suspicion. The army wasn't likely to overlook gaping wounds suddenly disappearing. All she could do was make them a little shallower and take some of the pain. But she found herself doing it over and over again. It was exhausting.

Several men were being worked on in the same room with doctors and nurses yelling across the space to one another. The initial chaos had quieted as the most traumatic cases were done being treated, but there was still a steady din of noise as they patched up the last of the wounds. Anna was finishing the last of the stitches she was putting in a soldier's side when the level of sound suddenly died out nearly completely. She glanced up with a frown only to see everyone's gaze locked on the doorway behind her. Anna turned in confusion, her brow furrowed.

Steve stood in the doorway, dirty and disheveled. They were home. The thought was enough to have Anna grinning despite the chaos around her. As the seconds passed without Bucky making an appearance, the smile began to fall. No. Her eyes darted around the room as she did her best to look anywhere but Steve. Finally, she met the super soldier's gaze.

Pure sorrow and regret shone back at her telling her all she needed to know. Her chest physically hurt and she was sure if someone listened hard enough they would actually hear her heart breaking. She shook her head as her hands began to tremble. "No." Her voice was little more than a whisper and she didn't think she'd even been heard until a hand fell on her shoulder.

"Go, Anna. We've got this." It was one of the doctors. But she didn't want to go, because if she did, she would have to know, have to listen to Steve tell her what happened. Have to face the reality of a world without Bucky Barnes.

She shook her head again as hot tears began to trace paths down her cheeks and her vision blurred. "No," she said again. A little louder this time, a little angrier.

Steve stepped forward and she held up a hand as if fending him off. "No." It was a demand. An order to leave her alone. To give her more time before he delivered the news.

But Steve was a captain and didn't take orders from an army nurse no matter how much he might wish to. He closed the distance between them. "I'm sorry, Anna." His voice broke.

"No." The word was a sob. A scream. A plea. Her knees gave way and she would have collapsed had Steve not been there to catch her. She gasped as she struggled to breathe past the crushing pain in her chest. Her Bucky. Her soldier. He couldn't be gone. Not yet. She sucked in a large breath of air which only served to fuel her sobs.

She vaguely registered Steve picking her up and telling someone to fetch Peg. He sat somewhere and settled her in his lap. Her head rested against his chest as her body shook. "You told me you'd bring him home to me."

His grip tightened briefly. "I know, Anna and I am so sorry. I'd give anything to bring him back to you. To us."

"It's not enough, Steve. It'll never be enough."

***

At some point she must have drifted to sleep because she woke in her bed alone. Disoriented by sleep, it took a moment to remember why she was here and not at work. A moment where everything in her world was as it should be. Then, she remembered. Bucky. She closed her eyes, her lids pushing out the tears that welled with the thought of him.

"I failed, Peggy," the voice drifted to her through the doorway. Steve.

"You didn't fail, Steve. You did everything you could," Peggy argued, trying to comfort him. "Bucky was your best friend. Everyone knows you would trade your life for his if you could."

"I don't think that will bring much comfort to Anna."

"She's grieving. Whatever she said, I'm sure she didn't mean it."

"I told her I'd bring him back, Peg. I was supposed to bring him back so they could get married and have babies. They were supposed to live happily ever after. Now she's laying in there with a broken heart and a ring on her finger that Buck put there less than a week ago. A week." There was a pause. "Men just keep dying and I'm not sure it's worth it anymore."

"You don't mean that." Peggy's voice was low, sad. "I'm devastated for Anna. For you. But even Bucky would tell you it was worth it, Steve. Look at all the good you're doing."

"Tell that to Anna. I'm sure it will be a great comfort."

After a moment, Peggy slipped into the room. Anna watched her as she tried to stay quiet so she wouldn't disturb her friend's sleep until their gazes locked. Pure sorrow flooded Peg's features and Anna knew Peggy's heart was just as broken as hers. Anna slid over in the bed and lifted an arm. The brunette crawled in next to her and they simply held each other while they mourned.