I Am Fictional Real

Chapter 5: My Coming Out Story

          The part about impossible is that I believed in it. It was impossible for LACEI to get out. It was impossible for me to travel one hundred years into the future and exist as if I never aged. It was impossible... to see that I was dangerous. But all of that happened. The word impossible implies that it could never happen. Not a chance. Never.
           As I backed into one of the walls, the lights flickered a few times before completely shutting off. I yelped. I wanted to say it was a coincidence that it happened, but Alinak's face told me otherwise. I didn't want to have this power. The goal was to be a hidden face in a crowd of familiar ones, but now Alinak knew my identity. LACEI was now just as vulnerable as Esinna Valunett, and I didn't want this power.
           "Is everyone okay? We had a power surge!"
           Alinak held out a hand, and I fell into his torso like a ragdoll. His scent of his coat was of pine, and oddly enough I could smell roses as well. As I felt the sudden rush of tears, the lights flickered back on.
            "I wont tell anyone about LACEI," Alinak whispered. "I'll make sure Bellieka keeps her place, as well. For now, you should get home."
             I pulled away. "And what about Akalirng?"
           "We'll discuss that tomorrow. I can already see your overly stressed."
             I lowered my face. This was no time to get snappy, so I followed him down the staircase and let my body guide itself back home. No one was alarmed by the fact I was walking out in arms with my guide. No one even paid me any mind as I kept my eyes back and forth as if I was afraid. I was afraid. Soon enough, we got back to the house, and Alinak seemed to stop right in his tracks as he came across the yard.
             "So," he started.
              I walked up the porch steps. "Just don't-"
             "You had a sister."
              "Lanien." I gripped the railing tightly as if I was refraining from actually hurting anything. "My sister."
              "I'll talk to you later, okay?"
              I nodded, walking up to the door and opening it to reveal an empty house. It was barely noon at this point, the sun at its peak. SLESII was probably still learning how to be someone, to be normal here when everything was so strange.
              I walked into my room, which was a relic at best. There were books scattered on a shelf, and some were on the floor. Some were open. I saw a dim lamp at the bedside that probably needed a new bulb, and in the window was a playful cactus. Small. Vibrant. This room felt welcoming, and maybe it was the pictures of families long gone that made me see how cozy this room was.
             I picked up one of the open books and noticed it was not a LACEI novel. It was titled "Some", and I read the first page out of curiosity.
          Some will understand
          You and I are Hell.
          We burn and sizzle,
          And we are cold.
         We make no sense,
         We are hated,
         But we welcome the damned.
         Some will understand.
          Poetry. Of course it was poetry. I sat down on my bed with the book on my lap, and I took in a breath. Some things were better left secret. Like Lanien.
          I missed her.

          I opened the door slowly as if not to alert Lanien I was coming inside. She got anxious at every sound imaginable, and maybe that was because I decided to choose the most dangerous job you could imagine. Instead of a young, running child, I found Lanien's sunken eyes staring at the yellowed screen of her laptop. She was doing homework again, the math kind I preferred not to help with. She waved, the sound of the air hitting my ears.
            Lanien and I were identical copies of each other, so I could see her looking just like me in a few years. Maybe I wanted her to. I sat down on the couch and heard the thumping of feet against the floor a room above. Child-like laughter came after, and Lanien and I had solemn glances.
            No whispers. No noise. That was the Valunett rules.
           "I missed you," she said through the thumps. When the kids were like this, we could talk.
            I closed my eyes. "Me too, Lanien."
            "Your day?" The thumps started fading as there was yelling.
            I smiled, my hand over my APCA. "Good. You?"
            The thumps stopped, but Lanien stood up from her desk and collapsed in the folds of my frame. "Good now that you're home."

              I woke up with a gasp, and the book I fell asleep with collapsed to the floor in a clatter. I held my head because it felt clogged, and I realized that the sun had long set. God. There was nothing here but the sound of the vents pushing air into the room. Cold, crisp air. My feet touched the carpet, and I waltzed into the hallway.
              "You're awake!"
               The voice startled me enough to make the lights flicker, but Likere didn't notice as she was all smiles and good things. It bothered me how opposite we were from each other, but her and I already knew that about each other. We shared a house, but we did not share our feelings.
               "I made some food," she told me. "I invited some friends from work, too, so I hope you don't mind."
               I did, but I just smiled at her and followed her downstairs into the kitchen. There were some people in the living room all picking around this bag of chips and salsa. A strange, odd thing to have in the future. I turned to the kitchen, where I found yet again the strange phenomenon of bagged faked food that was all packed in a square. Surely this kind of food wasn't also sent to the future by stasis means.
               "They're from the farmers and gardeners," Likere told me. "Have you not met them?"
I shook my head.
              "Well, there's an open field behind the forest where they have animals and whatnot. You should ask your guide to take you."
             I should ask Alinak to fuck off for a while, but i didn't try to say that out loud. Despite not knowing that we were each other's worst enemies, we had this rift between us. I wasn't one to gossip, anyway.
             I decided to eat one of the weird square pockets, and it managed to taste like one of those five dollar pizzas Lanien and I had to buy from time-to-time. Had to was an exaggeration. Lanien loved those cheap things. It was a delight because it did taste real, and it was warm on my tongue with spice.
              There was a knock at the door, and it must have been a shock to everyone because we all had this confused look on our faces. Likere realized no one was actually going to get the door, so she waltzed her way over and found a silhouette covered in water. Was it raining outside?
              "Esinna."
             It was Alinak. Immediately, I scrunched up my face as the anger was evident, and Alinak's smile faded. "What?" I grunted.
           "We need to talk. Now."
             I almost thought he was going to drag me out, but he just went out the porch and lit a cigarette while waiting for me. Likere just looked, but she went back to talking with her friends soon after. She flied from from one thing to the next like it's her job. I walked out onto the porch and stood next to Alinak as he took in another drag of his toxic tobacco. It wasn't raining outside.
            "What's bothering you now?" I asked him, annoyed.
             Alinak glared. "Bellieka's dead. Said that some loose wires shocked her to death."
            "What?"
           "I figured you didn't know." Alinak turned to me. "If you tell anyone else that you're LACEI, they will die."