The Lies That Bind

|6| Wipe Your Eyes

A/N: Hello? still remember this story? I know it's been a long time but I've decided to take this story up again. At first I didn't have much of a plot but the past couple of weeks I sat down and thoroughly developed a plot for this book. I shall actively keep this updated from now on. Enjoy the long awaited chapter! Warning: unedited. 

                                        Chapter 6: Wipe Your Eyes

                                I'm afraid that I gotta do what I gotta do
                                But if I let you go, where you gonna go?
                                We gotta make a change, time to turn the page
                                Something isn't right, I don't wanna fight you

        I part ways with Blake's apartment later that day when I all but drag him to my place so I can inform Ray that I am fine. Blake isn't happy with my decision to go back home but I can't just forget about my old life and live with him. I am not that girl.

        There are so many thing left unsaid. So many issues that I know we have to talk about but don't have the time or the guts to bring up. This pregnancy is unplanned and clearly a burden on both of us, I can feel it.

        Blake has a lot of enemies. He is involved with drug and weapon trafficking and controls the north cartel of the states. His responsibilities lie on his shoulders like hard rocks and there is no room for love, let alone a child in this rough environment.

        "What are we going to do, Blake?" I murmur while he drives to my apartment.

        Blake doesn't offer a reply at first. The soft rumble of the car's engine surrounds us as I wait for his next words.

        "We'll work it out, Scar. You just have to trust me."

        I glance at him, wondering whether I can really allow myself to believe him. I haven't seen him in months, how am I supposed to believe in him after all the lies we've fed each other with. Right now everything is blurry, so blurry I can't clear any of the confusion and uncertainty underneath this. Hell, I am still unable tell him the truth about Jake and Dan. The past is something even I long to not know. Would he hate me if he knows? Would he still love me after knowing everything?

        "I don't want to be another responsibility that you have to carry on your shoulders, Blake," I admit, looking away from him.

        "You're not a responsibility," He assures, a frown appearing in his lips. "How can you think that?"

        I shrug my shoulders, not knowing how to explain my emotions to him. How can I explain that my upbringing had stripped me from any confidence and self-esteem I ever had?

        "Scar?" he calls out. "What are you not telling me?"

        "Nothing," I reply a little too quickly. "Nothing."

        He shoots me a 'I don't believe you' look but doesn't say anything in return. The car falls silent again as we continue to zoom through the highway towards my place.

        "Tell me about Ray," Blake suddenly announces, drawing my attention away from my thoughts.

        I look at him in surprise. "Seriously?" I ask.

        He scowls at my expression and nods. "I need to know what kind of a person took care of you while I wasn't there. Plus, you talk really highly of him. I need to know what he did," he explains, not appearing very happy.