Sticks and Stones

Chapter 21

I wasn't out long. Only a few seconds had gone by before I regained consciousness and found myself shivering in Harry's arms. He was sitting on a large tree limb holding me. I was cold, wet, and hurting, both inside and out. I avoided his face completely. I didn't want to talk to him at all.

"Jess?"

I could feel him looking at me. Feel his pity for me. I didn't want anyone's pity or advice. I was fine until Harry came along.

I hear him sigh as he stands up, and starts carrying me to God knows where.

Nothing matters to me anymore. Now that Harry knows, I don't know what I'll do.

The only sound I hear is the snow crunching underneath Harry's shoes, and his heavy breathing. We arrive at his house, the lights still on, just like we left them, and he carries me in and sets me down on his bed, turning on a lamp, shutting the door behind us.

I finally make myself look at him, and when I do, I burst into tears.

His face is a mixture of anger, fear, and sadness. His green eyes just look at me and pull out of me all my emotions. I don't know if I'll ever be able to get used to the effect his eyes have on me.

Everything I've been holding in for so long, all the pain I've endured and suffered, explodes. My brick wall that I had built up, all those years, to harden myself and ignore people, crumbles.

I curl into a ball and sob, letting him lie next to me and wrap his arms around my shivering body. No objecting when he wraps us both in a blanket to stay warm.

"Shh, Jess, everything's going to be okay, you'll see," Harry whispers into my ear.

"No…" I sob, "You have no idea…you can't beat him."

Now that he knows what my life is really like, I have no doubt that he'll try to be my knight in shining armor and stop my father. If only I can get him to see that he can't win against him.

"Jessie, I'm here now, I'll protect you," he says, wrapping his arms tighter around me.

"Harry," I say quietly, moving slightly to look up at him. Determined to tell him how I feel about him, but scared of saying the words out loud.

I need to know, here and now, if he even remotely feels the same way I do about us.

"Yeah?" he asks, looking into my eyes.

I swallow hard, and say, "I…well, what I mean to say is…you see, I really…"

He laughs, "Again with the stuttering."

When he sees my face though, his expression becomes serious again, realizing that I'm trying to get out something important.

"What is it Jess?"

I gather my courage and quietly utter the words I never thought I would say, "I love you Harry."

I hear his sharp intake of breath and wonder for a minute if he doesn't feel the same way about me, if this whole thing was a mistake.

"I love you too," I hear him say and for a second, I think I imagined it.

But when I look into his eyes, I see that he truly said it, and means it.

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Maybe I know, somewhere, deep in my soul,     

that love never lasts,

But we've got to find other ways, to make it alone,

and keep a straight face.

And I've always lived like this,

keeping a comfortable distance,

And up until now I had sworn to myself to be content,

with loneliness,

'cause none of it was ever worth the risk.

But darling you are the only exception,

You are the only exception,

You are the only exception.

Oh and I'm on my way to believi