🔍 Silver Tongue (Slow Updates) 🔎

If I Don't Stand for Something...Ivan Will Fall

You'd think watching your brother shoot someone in the back of the head would lead to insomnia, but I slept through the night. Sure, it was a fitful, anxiety-filled rest, but I did sleep. In the grand scheme of things, that had to count for something.

I mean, how do you deal with such a thing? I can't say I disagree with murdering a pedophile; the thought of Pafford beating the system pissed me off as well, but there had to be a line, right? If Virtue just ran around executing people out of convenience, what made them better than that Mara 420 asshole the maids were cleaning off the floor.

I was being a hypocrite, though. I bet that little boy would have gave no fucks about my little moral dilemma if it would have resulted in a chance to grow up.

That's was probably the same conversation Ivan had with himself, Emily.

I still couldn't shake it though. I still couldn't justify Ivan's actions, as much as I wanted to. Something felt off about it.

The pounding outside my door gave me a chance to focus on something other than my existential crisis.

"Come in," I yelled. I was decent enough. And only one person only bothered to come out here to talk to me.

"Hey, Em," Darren said, walking through the door, the same cheerful smile plastered across his face. I felt a little embarrassed I hadn't once asked him his real name. But that guilt was mitigated by one simple fact.

I wanted to punch his face in.

"Fuck you," I snapped.

"Well, good morning to you too," he said, then snickered. "What's gotten into you?"

I stood up, my fists clenched. "It was you that left that radio on my dresser. Don't try to deny it."

Darren held up his hands. "I won't do that. Yes, I left it here."

"Then you know what happened."

"Yeah, I know," he said, taking slow steps towards my bed. "What I'm going to tell you right now would definitely get me killed, but I want you to trust me, so I'm going to lay it out there."

"You're still working with Virtue," I said. "Pretty obvious."

"Nah, screw them," Darren said. "Especially that asshole Patience." He rubbed his jaw. "No, I chose to work with Ivan, because I still believe in what he's doing. It's just that he's gone too far. Someone had to put aside their self-righteousness and try to pull him back. All of us thought you would be the one person who could talk some sense into him before he went too far. On that I did agree with Virtue. But I wasn't going to pull you into this mess, that was also too far. However, you're here now, so I figured I'd nudge you into giving it a shot."

I sighed. "If I told Ivan that, he probably would kill you."

"Yeah, I wouldn't put anything past him at this point," Darren said, dropping his hand. "There you go. Ammunition to get rid of my smiling ass permanently at your pleasure."

At that, I sat down and waved him over, kicking my leg on the bed, so he could reach my 'injured' ankle.

"You know that ankle's been well for days, right?" He said, smiling again.

"I figured," I said, sitting on the edge of the bed in response. He sat next to me, putting his doctor bag down.

"What now?" I asked.

He shook his head. "I'm out of ideas. Every person has a line and it's their line. Once they cross it, all bets are off. Thing is, I'm fine with killing for the greater good-I enlisted to do that shit-but that's my line. Not Ivan's. He's just hurting and when he comes down..." He shook his head. "I don't think he'll ever forgive himself or believe in his work again."

"I know," I said. "But what the hell am I supposed to do about it? I'm a call center clerk."

"You got a team full of experts in Virtue that couldn't figure it out. I'm a combat medic and I'm tapped. You can't do any worse that we did. Just know whatever you decide, I'll have your back."

"Thanks," I said, looking into his eyes. Then, I leaned in and kissed him. Hard, passionately. I pulled back as soon as I realized what I was doing.

"Sorry," I said. "I shouldn't have."

"That wasn't bad," Darren said, touching his lips. "Unexpected, though. I thought you were going to beat my ass with that look you gave me when I walked in." He put his doctor bag on the ground. "You're definitely going to get me killed, Emily Caceras."

"Probably," I agreed.

Then I ripped off his shirt.

-----

When a woke up, it was pitch black, Darren's arm draped across me as he snored softly. Part of me wanted to snuggle closer and feel his warmth. Another wanted to flip him on his back and wake him up in the most creative fashion I could think of. The third, however, and the one that buried the other two, told me that I had to figure out how to bring Ivan back now. All hesitation had been fucked right out of me.

I slid from his grip dropped to the floor. My mind raced, branching into different ways to bring Ivan back. Another personal appeal wouldn't work as he'd slid the barrier back in place. He would take my advice, sure, but he Darren was right. He had crossed his line. I had to give him a new one that he could hold onto, or he'd spiral into something none of us could live with, Ivan included.

But what?

What if I decided to work with Ivan? Acting like his moral advisor and giving him direction? That might appeal to him. I could crawl back to Virtue to force him to work with them again, but even so, the relationships had been frayed, enough that Darren seemed done with them as well.

Come on, Emily. Think!

"Most people don't come up with life-changing plans while they're buck naked," Darren quipped. "Though, I wouldn't mind watching the first."

"That's it!" I said, the gears finally moving into place. "You fucking chocolate genius."

"You know comparing black people to food is borderline racist, right?"

"Please," I said, kissing him. "You used more 'mamis" last night than Pitbull."

He chuckled and pulled me close to him. Close enough that I could feel what he wanted. "You going to tell me your epiphany?" he asked.

"Of course," I said. "I'm going to need your help."

He grinned, sending a shiver of anticipation down my spine. "Well, if I'm going to die for you, I think that warrants a proper sendoff, don't you think?"

I smiled, flipped him on his back and proceededto give him just that.