CHAPTER 6
I wake up to my head pounding, I close my eyes shut, putting my hands on both sides of my head, I squeeze my head, trying not to feel the pain. It doesn't help at all. I scream, tears threatning to come out, I've been crying way to much what the hell. John wakes up and sees me.
"Whats wrong?" he asks frantically. I point to my head, squeezing my I head more. He takes my hands and puts them down. He leaves the room and comes back with what I'm guessing is pain medicine, and some water. I drown the pills, still sobbing. He cradles me in his arm and rubs my back.
"Lets go eat breakfest." he tells me. Leading me downstairs, I look at his family photos, loving the ones with him as a kid. He pours me a bowl of cereal, and slides it to me. I look at the bowl, remembering my mothers words. Your brother and dad wouldn't want someone in the family fat. Losing my appetite, I push it away.
"I'm not that hungry right now." I tell him. He looks at me skeptically.
"Alright, lets go to the living room, watch some tv for a little bit." Going to to the living room we put on SpongeBob Squarepants, one of my favorite cartoons. We watch it literally all day. By supper time, I tell him I'm going up to his room to take a nap. He nods, saying he will be in a hour. Instead of going to his room, I find a way to go up to the roof. Finding my way there I sit there, looking up at the sky, turning its way dark. I think for awhile.
5 days ago, my brother and dad died. I will never see them again. I never got to say my final goodbye,my final hug, my final I love you. It downs on me, that not only will I never see them again, but the fact that I'm disappointing them. I ran away from my own mother, and I'm getting fat. What am I doing? I walk to the edge of the roof, just standing there. Would anyone care if I died? Would anyone notice? Would my mom do anything? Maybe I deserve to get beaten.
Wait, why am I thinking about this? I feel arms pull me back.
"Abby, what were you doing?! I've been looking for you for and hour! Were-were you going to kill yourself?" John whispers.
"Would anyone care John? Would my mom notice? John I'm getting fat, even my mom told me so. My brother and dad wouldn't approave of that. They wouldn't approave of me cutting. They probably hate me now. I wasn't trying to kill myself. I just thought about it. God, what am I even saying?" I yell at him.
"Abby, really? I'd care and thats all that matters. For goodness sake you're not fat either. You're like a twig. You dad and brother should be proud of you no matter what. It was one time, you won't do it again. Gosh abby, your beautiful. Your smile, your hands, they way you blush so easy. The way when you smile your dimples show. The way your nose crinckles when you don't agree on something. The way your so damn stubborn. I love who you are Abby, and it would kill me to see you go." He chokes, sobbing. I'm so fucking selfish. I run to him kissing him fully on the lips, passionetly.
"God, damn it John. I fucking love you." I mumur. He looks at me and whispers "I love you too." We walk to his room staying up all night chatting. We lay in bed, cuddling.
"Lets play 21 question." I say, still not tired.
He shrugs, "Alright. Did you mean it when you said you love me?" he asked me, hope in his eyes.
"100%." I smile at him. We play the game all night, knowing more about each other. Before you no it I kiss him, hard.
"I love you John." I whispers, before snuggling against him.
Fuck this is aweful and short. Sorry I'm having a bad night. but story will get better, hopefully. sorry for grammer mistakes.
