YAY UPDATE!! this one is longer for you guys :3 i think you deserve it :D oh and if you guys could try to get some people to read my fic it would be GREATLY appriciated!! unless you want to keep this for yourself... haha
ANYWAYS
here is chapter 6!!
ENJOY!
-shelbo
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Chapter 6
I was still sitting in the hallway after my encounter with Rick. Harry wasn’t touching me or coming close to me after my last reaction. I jumped when he tried to comfort me out of instinct. I started thinking again about that night. This made all of my feelings and fears come flowing back to me. I felt tears streaming down my cheeks as I started shaking from sobs. I was on full melt down right now. I wanted Harry. I wanted him close. He was still here wasn’t he?
I shot my head up in fear that he had left me and reached out a hand to see if he was here. As I reached out I felt his soft hand in mine. I pulled myself up using his hand and pretty much fell into his arms. His hand was rubbing comforting circles in my back… again, still not used to so many people caring. I was used to people like Rick, not caring about anyone but himself and ragging at anyone who was different in some sort of way. I
noticed that as I was thinking I had collapsed onto the floor still in Harry’s embrace. I felt sobs escape my lips and started hoping that we were alone in the hallway.
“w-we should get to class… “ I reminded Harry with a sniffle as I wiped my eyes on the back of my hand.
“Lou, if you don’t feel up to it right now we can just explain it to her later and I’m sure that your mum will understand.” I am SO relieved that he suggested not going to class. As if on cue, the bell rang signaling for us to go to class. As an answer to his question I slid down the wall and sat down, burying my head in my hands. I felt him slide down next to me and felt an arm drape around my shoulders hesitantly. “I’m ok.” I reassured him with a weak whisper. My voice was still not trust worthy at the moment. I leaned my head on his shoulder and half onto his chest, hiding my face.
He made me feel better… like everything was ok even when it wasn’t. Just his touch, sound, and smell was enough to calm me down. I am realizing that I am falling for this boy. I have to make sure I get over that. Sure, he is gay, but why would he choose me out of all people…? It’s like for example if we went on a date, I wouldn’t be able to tell him he looked nice, or look into his eyes, or watch the sunset with him, or do other things that a NORMAL person could. I am not the best for him, so therefore I must get over it if I care about him. I should try setting him up with someone!… oh. I don’t know anyone… well I could ask if he liked anyone and help him get with them… maybe. I don’t think that I could live with him loving someone else. But, if I really DO love him, I will learn to live with it. I wonder how I should ask him? Oh gosh this is too hard, I can’t live with myself knowing that I helped him love someone different! I don’t know what to d-
“Lou what are you thinking so hard about?” Harry’s tone sounded worried. Did I make myself look worried? Oi sometimes I forget that I am the only one who can’t see people’s reactions.
“Nothing.” My voice was barely a whisper, I feel so… so… Broken. Rick really pushed me over my limit with the shoulder grabbing. I know that I should’ve gotten over it by now but with what has happened in my past it is harder. This may make it harder to talk to my mom tonight about it, but she will hear about me not going to first period class so she will be bringing Rick up into a conversation.
