Hopeless? ~ Third Part of Loverboy.

Chapter 9. ~ Ashley.

I guess most people would define the word "empty" as a space, object or something in general that has no content, something with a void, hollow. I think you could say that until recently I would have been part of that population, until now. 

The word "empty" had acquired totally and completely a new meaning. 

For me, empty was feeling that every particle of the air I breathed didn't particulary fill my lungs, it was not being able to distinguish whether I was specifically in reality or I was just being delirious. Empty was knowing that my life was mostly a lie, and that all I ever knew wasn't true anymore, as if someone had destroyed the building my body wa smade of in a single stroke, making my whole being crumble in seconds. 

—What's wrong? —I heard Dionne heard asking, standing next to Patrick, who was looking at me with his arms crossed over his chest. 

—I don't know. She's been like this for the past hours. —Patrick replied, making his voice traveling through my ear canal, sending turbulence throughout my body. 

—Are you sure she isn't sick? —Dionne asked again. 

—She's fine. Just a little dizzy and confused, I guess. 

A little? A little? 

"A little" would be if I could open my eyes without seeing things that I don't exist. "A little" would be to be able to sleep without having to wake up every 5 minutes. 

—Oh, well. —Dionne's laugh rang through the cabin—. Have you told her already? 

I opened my eyes a little, enough to watch as they talked through my eyelashes. 

Patrick, as always, smiled. —Yes... It was somewhat pleasurable. 

Screams. His fingers digging into my skin. His body pressing against mine. Everything went through my head again. 

Dionne replied with a dirty smile. —Then I think this will be even more pleasurable. 

She walked over to where I was sitting and shook my neck. She slapped my cheek once so I could react. 

—Come on, we haven't got all day, darling. —Her acute voice demanded of me, but I didn't want to do anything that involved somehow these two people. 

I opened my eyes because unfortunately I had no choice. As I said, I'd rather die already than having to go through psychological torture. 

But I think it's too late for that. 

Dionne reached into her purse to find something. I couldn't imagine what was next for me. 

She took out a small and thin object that I recognized as my phone, and I knew this was wrong. She dailed a pair of numbers as if looking something, making me sicker as the seconds passed. 

She took the phone to her ear until she finally took it off again and pressed the screen to put it on speaker. 

—Apparently someone wants to say several things to you after you broke up with him so mercilessly. —Dionne said. 

—"Ashley, what are you doing? Why aren't you answering? Are you avoiding me? I need to talk to you. I don't nderstand what you mean. Please call me when you can."

»"Kiddo, what is it? I'm worried. Please, answer. I love you."

»"I don't... I don't know what I did, okay? Is this why you haven't talked to me? Please... Tell me something. You're kidding, right?"

I felt a dagger going across my heart. I felt a tornado of pain created by my own body throwing debris at all the sensitive spots of my body. I didn't know how much more I was going to be able to bear until I broke completely.