I Dare You...

Chapter 4

I am going crazy. I am legitly going crazy. I am not just crazy mom trying to get her kid to school through morning traffic crazy. I am straitjacket in a mental hospital that smells like hand sanitizer crazy. I was in such a hurry to leave the mall without missing my parents arriving that I completely forgot that I was driving on a road, in the middle of traffic, with other people who could care less about my strict parent situation. I got flipped off and cussed at so much that I nearly drove off the road into a ditch. I didn’t get pulled over or anything though because if I had then I would have been caught instantly by my parents and any hope for being the perfect child they want would have been remotely shot to hell.                                                                  I was blinded. Not by my inner thoughts or feelings or any emotional crap. I was seriously blinded. I was blinded by the random flash of a camera at a stop light. Not like they were getting my license plate but an actual Kodak camera. This camera was in the hands of some random person in a car beside me. I didn’t get to see what it was but I am still wondering why anyone would just randomly take a picture of me. Unless it was for some creepy website about taking pictures of under aged people in the front seat of cars at random small town stop lights. But nobody has a website like that and if you did what would make me so special that I could be posted on the front page of this so called website. I was wearing an oversized sweatshirt and my hair was in a messy bun. That is definatly not attractive enough for a website like that.                                                                                                         So now I am sitting in my room on my bed debating whether or not something like that should make me psychotic. I am too worried about being caught having clothes like these than I am about some creepy person with a camera but it still bothers me. I get off my bed and walk over to my vanity. In the mirror I see a character. An actor who is playing the role of a nerd. The role has been there for three years. It has never faded or been changed. I see the face of someone who has been put through some odd things. Like being bullied for playing a part. I close my eyes and take in the remaining looks of someone that I have known forever.                                                                                                             I wake up two hours early than I usually do this morning. I take a hot shower and then make my way to my closet. I completely pass by my old oversized clothes and take a white, low cut, button up blouse off of the hanger. I find my new push-up bra and begin to get dress. I also put on a short black shirt and my uniform tie. I put the tie on very loose to it makes my cleavage stand out more. I sit down at my vanity and pull out my makeup. I began powdering and blushing my face. I add on some thick eyeliner and a ton of mascara. I can hear my parents leaving for work down stairs. I look in the back of my vanity drawer and fine some expensive red lipstick. I put it on thickly and then begin doing my hair. I curl my hair into really pretty ringlets and then look back at what I created. I look hot. I almost put on my fake glasses but stop myself.

“I guess I have contacts now”, I said smiling. I get up from my chair and walk over to my closet. I pull out my new 10 inch heel black boots and fishnets. I put them on and they complete the look. I look like I have always dressed this way. This look seems so much more natural compared to when I dressed like a complete nerd. Now I can go glasses free and I can be myself. I skip downstairs and it then hits me when I open the coat closet that I had homework.

“Fuck it!” I yell and grab my bag. I then begin to walk out the door. I then realize though that I can take my car. I run back upstairs and get the keys to my tricked out hello kitty car. I hop in the front seat and put my bag in the passenger floor board. I start my car and as it comes to life I realize there is no going back. Today I am going to stand up to Kimberly if she starts with me. How can she call me a nerd when I look like one of them? I smile to myself and check my makeup in the mirror.

“Still looking hot,” I say to myself and then back out of the driveway. The road is so foggy that I am struggling to keep from taking out a mailbox or trashcan. I drive the ten minutes to my school while listening to Katy Perry sing about how she is wide awake. Then I realize that I am wide awake myself. I see now that I shouldn’t hide who I really am from everyone. I pull up to the school and see everyone is scattered through the commons. I get my bag and leave the car before my friends can say anything about the homework. I walk into the school and around corners until I find my locker. I swirl the dial and begin opening it when a note falls out:

Dear Marissa,

I’m sorry about what happened with Kimberly yesterday. I hope things get better. I know you’re an awesome person and maybe they will sometime soon. If you need someone to talk to here: 704-990-2235

Anonymous.

Attached the note was a red rose. I couldn’t move. I could barely breathe. Who would take time out of there day to write me a note and put it in my locker without something mean on it? I held the rose for what seemed like forever until everyone started piling in the hallways. People kept looking at me in awe and they kept telling people about me. A couple of guys made remarks that I look hot and some girls just ignored me completely. I smiled to myself.

“People like what they see”, I whispered. I closed my locker and left to class with a smile on my face and the rose in hand.                                          When I walked through the door into the class room everyone eyed me. The whole room started to quiet down and people stared at me as I made my way to my seat. Kimberly walked through the door twirling her hair and chewing bubble gum. She took one look at me and laughed.

“Ha! So you’re a wanna be now?” she said still chewing her gum.

“Please. You’re so fake Barbies are jealous.” I replied. I stood from my desk and moved in front of her. I didn’t stand so awkward anymore. I stood with confidence.

“ Well at least Barbie gets guys.”

“Because Velcro holds her clothes on?

“No. Cause she has a dream body.”

“Made of plastic.”

“She gets them because she’s hot!”

“She gets them because some lonely girl makes her get them.”

“They made Ken for a reason.”

“So lonely guys could play with Barbies?”

“No so she has a boyfriend!”

“Made of plastic?”

“We all know you’re a nerd so shut up!” Kimberly said as she pushed me hard. I stumbled but remained on my feet. I then walk towards her slowly and smiled.

“You like gum? Well chew this!” I said I pushed back and she, this time, landed on the ground. She looked up at me with a shocked look and then tried to get to her feet. By that time though, Ms. Turner had come to the rescue and broke us up. She said we had one warning and then we would go the principal’s office. I have never been there before and if I do my rep is over.                                                                                                                         As Kimberly sat at her desk beside her boyfriend’s, she smiled at me and held up a picture. It then hit me that my rep was long gone. I picked up the rose and looked at it.

“If someone cares so much, take the picture away.”