The Arthur Paladin Chronicles

Chapter Seven: The Lynx, the Wolf, and the Valet

Something cold and damp nudged Arthur's cheek. He swatted it away and fell back into a deep slumber. Something rough and wet scraped across his nose. Annoyed, he shoved ... whatever it was ... away and returned to sleep. Something batted him on the jaw. That roused him halfway. Another strike followed — ow! — and someone hissed:

"Oh, for Pete's sake."

Arthur awoke, groggily — forced his eyes open — and nearly screamed as he shoved himself back against the wall. A lynx was looming over him, an actual, honest-to-goodness lynx — thick fur, wide paws, tufted ears, and all. The lynx was entirely monochrome: her body was gray-white, as if she'd been primed but never painted. Where the shades seemed to be made of solidified shadow, this big cat seemed to be composed of something like ... like moonlit fog, perhaps.

"You know what's strange?" the lynx said. Naturally, it could talk — that's the way Arthur's life worked now. "I haven't the slightest idea who Pete is — do you?" Her voice was flowing yet husky, like that of a glamorous star from an old movie who had smoked way too many cigarettes after her career ended.

Arthur shook his head.

"I'm Alexis," she said, dramatically. "But please, call me Lexi." Her solid black eyes flicked up at the ceiling, and she chewed her lip, just like a person trying to unravel a puzzle. "Well, you know that's kinda dodgy. Why would I prefer to be called Lexi?"

Arthur shook his head again.

The lynx sat back on her haunches and looked at each paw in turn. "Well, I haven't got your tongue, so it's definitely not my fault you can't speak."

Morgan stirred beside Arthur. "He's just dumb. Don't pay him any —" Morgan opened her eyes and shoved herself back against the wall. "Yikes!"

Lexi waved a paw at her. "Hello, girl-who-finally-speaks!"

"Hi!" Morgan chirped back in alarm.

"You are scaring the both of them, Alexis," said a voice that sounded like a Shakespearean actor heard through an old tube radio.

From the shadows prowled a monochrome wolf. Like Lexi, he seemed composed of moonlight. Arthur and Morgan both scooted closer to one another. Where the heck had these two ... ghost animals ... come from?!

"I am Vassalus," said the wolf. "You may not address me in any other manner. Though, like my comrade Alexis, I am not certain as to why that is my preference."

"What — what are you?" Arthur asked.

"Oh, I do know that, darling," Lexi said. "We are numina."

"Numen in the singular," Vassalus added. "I am a numen; we are numina. You may also think of us as guardian daemons, if you must. I would prefer if you did not. We are formed from Aetheria. Lady Ylliara of the Manse brought us forth from the subconscious of each of you."

Morgan pointed at Lexi. "You are from my subconscious?"

"Oh heavens no, my dear," said Vassalus. "I am from your subconscious. Alexis came from Arthur."

"Oh," replied Morgan, "that makes sense."

"It does?" Arthur asked.

Lexi flicked her fluffy tail back and forth with irritation. "What, you're not happy with me?"

"Oh, I'm ... I'm not unhappy," Arthur said. "Just a bit puzzled. I don't understand any of this."

"Well, it's hardly my fault if you lack self-awareness and don't remember your Grandma Paladin except in the deepest recesses of your — hey, how do I know about your Grandma Paladin?" Arthur shrugged. Lexi flicked her head one way and then the other while pouncing around in a circle. She became more agitated with each pounce. "Does anyone know where I left my c/slate? I need to download this month's copy of Today's Intergalactic Woman — there's an article in there that I must read. And where is my cup of Darjeeling and my lingonberry scone? You know I can't function if I haven't — wait, where did that come from? I don't eat scones and drink tea — I'm a cat!"