away // brallie

nine

brandon's perspective

I awoke the next morning, my breath shaking and my heart racing. The sun has not peaked yet, and it was still pitch black outside. Callie was still fast asleep, her eyes glued shut and her chest rising and falling normally. We had parked the car on the side of the road and locked it, and prayed nothing bad would happen. I pulled my phone out, and the screen illuminated my face. It was 4:08 AM. I was so worried that when we didn't show up to school that we would be busted. Callie said that we would be fine and that no harm would come to a few day's absence, but it still overtook my mind. Part of me wanted that feeling of home and settlement again, not the stress and anxiety of being on the go and having to spend every waking moment worrying about getting caught. If only my mind was as easy-going as Callie's. I seldom felt care-free, and if I did, it was only for a moment.

There were a few missed notifications on my phone from yesterday afternoon, some calls from my mom and some from Mariana. She mad messaged me, 'Missing you around the house. The only mature face is gone :(.' I knew that she was probably fast asleep and lost in a dream, but I decided to message back anyways. 'Sorry. It got too overwhelming, and I thought you would be the last person to miss me.' I sent it, locking my phone and setting it down gently. Right away, it vibrated in my hands, 'I'm so so so so sorry Brandon. I know what you are going though is terrible and hard. I should have never said what I said, it was awful and rude. You didn't deserve that and it was probably the last thing you needed.' It bewildered me; she had answered at 4 AM and she was sorry for her anger and hate towards me. I didn't even pray for the day to come because I figured that she would never even care about me. 'Mariana, I am in awe. I forgive you thoroughly. Also, why are you awake at 4 AM? You need to sleep.'  I peaked up over my phone to look at Callie. She was still in the same orientation as before, and she still appeared to be fast asleep. I didn't want her to be awoken by me, because I was the only one who deserved to feel the wrath of my anxiety. She looked so peaceful and content, almost as if nothing could ever make her feel angry or bothered. 'Can't sleep. Want me to come over, we can talk face to face?' She had sent back shortly, but it had made my mouth pry open and eyes widen. She expected me to be at my dad's house, but I was in the middle of nowhere and I didn't know how to get home.

I tapped Callie gently on the shoulder, as much as I didn't want to wake her, "Cal, love, wake up." I whispered, and she stirred a little bit, a slight groan escaping her parted lips.

Her eyelids opened slowly, revealing her gentle brown eyes, "Brandon, what time is it?" She asked, her groggy morning voice quiet.

I bit my lip anxiously, "Around 4 AM. But we have a problem. Mariana is awake and we were texting, and she asked to come over." I said, which triggered Callie to sit up. Her face became worrisome, which ultimately made me feel even worse.

She reached out and took my hands in hers, "Why would she ask to come over at this time, anyways? Just say you are going to go back to sleep and don't need her to come over." Callie urged, pointing at my phone which was gripped so tightly in my hand that my knuckles were white. I typed back to her, 'Sorry, I'm headed back off to bed.' It was all I could come up with; I didn't want to give myself away with too much detail. I locked my phone and tossed it down onto the seat. Callie's eyes gave a concerned look towards me, and I knew she couldn't help feeling guilty about my anxiety because she took me along on this trip. 

For some reason that would take too many words to explain, I started to cry. Not sobbing, just crying. Warm tears rolled down my cheek, striking me by surprise as they just kept rolling out. Callie sighed, climbing into my lap and throwing her arms around me. Her embrace gave me the slightest reassurance that everything was okay right now, nothing bad was happening to me in the moment. Her sweet and simple touch reminded me that I needed to live in the moment, and not be so worried about the future. I knew that those things would be easy to think, but not so easy to make a reality so quickly. It takes time to heal a broken mind. 

Callie took my face in her hands, "Things may seem like they are going to hell in your mind right now, but look around. There aren't flames engulfing us and Satan isn't outside the window. I will take all the blame for this, Brandon. I wanted you to have some fun and escape that head of yours in which you seem to love to spend time in. I know that it's easy for me to say this but I am not suffering from depression and anxiety, so I don't know what it's like to be in that state of mind. I just want you to know that I am always here for you, and you will never ever be judged by me, okay?" Callie said, nodding her head up and down. I nodded back at her, placing my hands gently down into her thighs. "I love you so damn much, Brandon. Seeing you in so much pain and misery just hurts me. Do you want to go home...will that make you feel better?" She asked, gazing deep into my eyes. 

I nodded my head, "Please." I said, the word catching in my throat. She placed a soft kiss on my lips, then pulled back keeping her forehead tight to mine. She held my face still, circling her thumbs on my cheeks. 

She pulled herself off of me, then climbed back into the drivers seat, "Okay. Get buckled in and get some sleep. I'll get us home even before school starts, and we will have only missed Monday, okay?" She said, starting the car up. 

I followed her and climbed into the passengers seat, "Okay." I said, clicking my belt into place. 

They say perfect people don't exist, but I think somehow, Callie is the perfect girl.