Random Thoughts of the Author

A little chat with death

The light flickered for a moment...

and there he was - looming over me, robed with his dark cloak, holding his iconic scythe. I half expected a skeletal hand to reach out and claim my soul but perhaps I was letting my imagination run too wild.

I paused, alarmed at his presence. I was still so young and I had so much more I wanted to do... I was so close to getting into university and finally starting my life. I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. My new life... My precious, beautiful freedom? All gone - everything I had put up with... my whole life had been pointless. Those hours spent laboring over subjects that did not interest me? Gone - gone for naught. I had nothing to show for it. If only I had studied the subjects that I truly desired to study - Art, English, history and computer science... Instead, I had gone for Maths, Further Maths, physics and Computer science. I had wasted my life trying so hard... I had done so many things I didn't want to for my 'future'...

"D - death?"

"Yes"

"I don't su - suppose that I can bargain with you or make a bet right? You know, in the stories they tell! A game of chess or... or poker or whatever? For my life..."

*Death sighs*

"I think we both know that isn't possible"

"Why???"

Death Paused for a moment... taking out a weathered looking brown scroll.
"Let's see... I suppose you could say because of - 'Wibbley Wobbley Timey Wimey... Stuff?'"

I was shocked beyond words and for the briefest of moments I could have sworn I felt him smile.

"I- wha!?!? You... like doctor who?"

"No, no... you miss the point, for you see... I'm not here to take your life from you but to guide you to the next life. After all 'Death is but the next great adventure.'"

He spoke the last words whilst checking his scroll again.

"Harry Potter?? - I don't quite understand...."

"Think of me as your guide, It's quite complicated but basically I've been chosen to guide and keep you company - based on your personality, religion and other factors"

"O.K..."

"Tell you what kiddo, why don't we have a little game before we go? Chess was it?"

I paused for a moment. This was probably my last chance, I had to seize this opportunity...

"Actually, I was wondering if... perhaps... we could play... ah never mind, you'd probs think I'm trying to trick you out of taking my soul or something" I muttered incoherently.

Again, I felt him smile.

"No, no... it's quite O.K., after all I already know what you're going to ask. Go on, ask me"

There was just something about him... he was just so... nice, and easy to talk to.

"Well... I dunno then, it feels kinda off me telling you something you already know" I smiled

"Go on," He egged, "I'm here to guide you after all- to teach you how to overcome the difficulties you felt in this world."

"Well," I blurted out in a quiet tone, "I've.. I've always wanted to play a game of warhammer 40k"

I blushed, feeling extremely embarassed, Me? Playing a futuristic boardgame with death?? what was I thinking?

"The- The thing is..." I stumbled, "I... I don't really know the rules or have a lot of painted miniatures..."

"I was wondering... if may - maybe you and I could..." I trailed off.

"Paint a few orks and space marines and have a massive battle?" He completed.

I nodded furtively, almost expecting him to decline.

"Sure!"

"Y-you mean it?" I asked,"I - I don't even really know the rules..."

Yet again, I felt that warm glow of affection from him and I relaxed.

5 hours later:

"Pew pew pew!"

I laughed at death - he was not the nonchalant in-expressive entity I had assumed he was when I first met him. For the first time in a long time - I felt satisfied... I felt the burdens of my previous world escape me, and I felt true freedom. There was no reason to run, to flee - Freedom had always been a part of my life, I had just been too preoccupied to see it. I felt no pangs of regret - no earthly emotions. Death had shown me what life could not. I was no longer that lonely kid who pushed himself every day to see that brighter future, no - I was living in the present, and I was enjoying every second.

"Death... thank you" I whispered, "I'm no longer lonely when I have you. I think I'm ready now"

I cringed slightly at that lame sentence. But it was true - and truth be told, I didn't really enjoy the game as much as I had hoped, but that was O.K. because I enjoyed his presence more than anything I had experienced in my life before.

He smiled too, "well... before that - aren't you even slightly curious as to how you died?"

"now that you mention it - I haven't asked that have I?" I asked, " you're not going to tell me something like I haven't actually died are you?"

"nahhh - you did die," He giggled like a preteen girl, "You died by slipping on a bar of soap and cracking your head"

I blushed yet again... and the last thing I thought when I left this world was that I hated death... (although perhaps not in the way you might expect)