Rejects [DISCONTINUED]

Chapter Nineteen

(Joey's POV)

After all the panic attacks, Daniel refuses to leave my side. Whenever he would take one step away from me, he'd freak out and cry. I've been through as many panic attacks as him so I know just what to do. Whenever he'd move away from me, I'd make sure to still have an arm wrapped around him. This morning I woke up to Daniel crying beside me, I sat up and tugged him toward me but he pushed me away "what's wrong Danny?" Checking my phone, I notice that it's three in the morning "are you okay? Did you have a nightmare?" Daniel looks over at me for a second before looking down "I'm sorry" scooting over beside him, I rest my head on his shoulder "don't apologize." I know exactly what he's apologizing for, he thinks he's burdening me. "Daniel, I need you to listen very carefully to what I'm about to say" he nods.

"Daniel, you've been with me through times of insecurity, times of panic, and doubt. But not once did you give up on me. For you to think that I'd be upset with you because you're going through anxiety attacks is ludicrous! Daniel, I love you, I would never get annoyed with you through times like these. I would never push you away when you're going through something, I'd be a terrible human being if I did. For you to think I'm going to walk away is crazy, I'm not leaving you." Looking over at me, Daniel tackles me down in a hug, crying against my collarbone "thank you."

During school, teachers were looking at Daniel and me, knowing what's been going on with Daniel. Just in case anything happened again, they'd let me bring Daniel out in the hallway to calm him down in private. Every morning, each of our teachers would ask how we were doing, focusing the most on Daniel. Of course, Daniel would lie, saying that he was fine. I rest my hand on his chest so I could feel his heartbeat, telling immediately if his heart rate goes up. Halfway through fourth period, I could hear his breathing become quick and layered, his heart starts racing. Our eyes meet and I knew that he was going through another attack. I raised my hand and the teacher nods, I pick up Daniel and carry him to the hallway. "Breathe Daniel, breathe. It's okay, he's not here, he's not here. It's just you and me, no one is here to hurt you." I rubbed his back and kissed his temple between sweet words. Sooner or later, Daniel calms down, hiding his face against my neck. "It's okay Daniel, everything is okay."

Fast forward, it's been four days since Daniel's last panic attack and I'm starting to get worried. Sure, it's probably good that he hasn't had one, but I feel as though Daniel's been bottling them up inside him. He hasn't been opening up to me as much as he used to. He's been working more hours, going to bed after me. I've had enough, why is he shutting me out all of a sudden? Finally, Daniel gets a day off of work, he's now relaxing on the couch just reading his favorite book for the fifteenth time. "Daniel?" He looks up at me with a blank unamused expression "yes?" I sit beside him "have you gotten sick of living with me?" His face drops "what?" Tears threaten to form "I mean, you barely talk to me anymore, you go to bed after you know I'm asleep, you just looked at me like I'm a stranger. I don't get it Daniel, has it come to the point where you think we should spend time apart because if that's what it's come down to I have nowhere to go. It's fine if that's what it is, I'll find somewhere. Just tell me" Daniel looks down, closing the book.

"I do think we need time apart."

The words I never wanted to hear, finally slipped through his lips. I choke out a sob, standing up "so this is it? We're done?" Daniel stands and takes my hand in his "no, we're not over. I just think we need to take a break" "oh like Ross and Rachael from Friends? Are you going to cheat on me?" "What? No! Joey, it's just that we've been spending so much time together, it's not good for us." "Not good for us or for you? Because from what I've recollected, I thought you were fine with me living here!" "I was...at the time" my eyes widen, tears spill "Daniel, I moved out of my house, my family threw away all my things because I decided to live here with you! What do you mean at the time?! Where is this coming from?!" "We moved in too fast! Our relationship moved so quickly! I barely know you" "that's not a reason for you to want a break! That's a reason for us to go on more dates, get to know each other!" My heart was breaking, I couldn't feel anything. "I can't believe you want this, I never thought you or I would take a break. I thought we were stronger than that" Daniel sighs "I guess we're not."

I could feel and hear my heart break inside of me. I fell onto the floor in a puddle of tears. But Daniel didn't kneel beside me, he just stood there as I cried at his feet. Picking myself up, I wiped my tears and looked at the man before me "who are you?" Daniel doesn't answer me, just stares back at me. Turning away, I walk over to the bedroom, repacking my duffel bag. I turn to look at Daniel as I open the front door "I hope you're happy now Daniel."

As I walk down the streets of Daniel's neighborhood, I realize that I truly have nowhere to go. My friends don't know about my situation and I don't want to let anyone in for a long time after this. Walking into the center of town, I find a homeless shelter. I never thought I'd end up here, but at the same time, I never thought I'd be without Daniel. Just thinking about him brings me to tears, what did I do to make him want to take a break? Have I been annoying him? No, I mean, I've been the one helping him through the panic attacks. Unless...I was really the cause of them.

I guess I've been too clingy.

But how can I not be, I mean...

He promised he'd never leave me........