Bat Boy [boyxboy]

Healing Terrin

Healing Terrin

April 30th, 2012, 11:00pm, Ward 6, Church Hospital

Frost was slowly beginning to work its way over my canvas shoes as I stared up at the brightly lit wall of windows and stone of the hospital. I had been standing here for about three hours now, trying (and failing) to work up the courage to merely walk inside. Every breath clouded the air in front of me, my nose numb and freezing inside with every inhalation. I know I should just talk to him; it wasn’t that big of a deal. I worried about him over the past three days, incessantly. Like a constant itch under my skin, a nagging in the corner of my brain, he was always there haunting the darkest corners. All I could focus on was his small frame and frail limbs, the paleness of his skin and coal black eyes.

I just wanted him to be okay.

“Dammit to hell,” I muttered in frustration, finally forcing my body to move. Each step cracked the joints in my knees, stiff from standing in one place for so long. I wouldn’t blame him if he has given up on me. I would have given up on me if I had to wait for this long. What the hell were you thinking just abandoning him like that? He’s a suicide victim. Don’t you think he’s kind of been left alone to suffer long enough?

Grunting unhappily at my conscience, I tugged my hand out of my pocket, opening the hospital doors and wandering inside. I knew where he was sadly. Just because I was too cowardly to see him didn’t mean I didn’t check in with the reception every afternoon when I could escape my ‘parents’.

I didn’t know how to relate to everyone around me… just being in the same house was awkward. Imagine living with strangers who treat you as if they know every single one of your secrets and memories. Frightening is the easiest way to describe it. Every moment around my ‘family’ felt like I was treading on eggshells; I never knew when something I might say or the wrong expression on my face might set off some kind of emotional switch for Wendy –mum- or cause Katie –my ‘sister’- to throw me a wary glance. I never spoke to my supposed father. He avoided me, understandably. We treated each other like complete strangers, and I was okay with that. In fact, I welcomed it. This ‘Sharlynn’ kid, I had no idea what his life was like and to be honest… I didn’t want to. Adjusting was hard enough; all I wanted to do was to create my own life again. Rebuild from scratch. Then maybe I could finally feel comfortable in this shell I’m in.

“You alright there love?”

A voice alerted me to the silence surrounding me, there wasn’t too much bustle at this time of night although I suppose that’s always changing. Turning , I smiled at the older nurse.

“Yes thank you, just thinking.”

“Don’t think too much about it sweetheart. Bad things happen, I know all too well,” she touched my arm gently, softness welling in kind blue eyes. “Why don’t you just go inside?”

“It’s not that easy,” I mumbled, turning to stare at the block letters glaring me in the face. Reaching out I traced my fingers over the cold metal of the door handle.

Ward 6. Recovery.

Covering my hand with hers she pushed downwards, the click echoing through the hall. “It’s also not as difficult as you think,” she whispered softly, winking at me as I glanced at her in surprise. “He’s in the bed closest to the window. Said he wanted to be able to see.”

Slightly shocked I watched as she waddled away, all manner of thoughts running through my head but none of them making sense.

Just go inside.

Awkwardly shuffling my feet the bed slowly came into view, beeping of monitors and sounds from televisions invading the space. I had no idea what to say to him, I had no idea why I was here. Why did I care for him this much? Why couldn’t I just leave it alone? He wasn’t my responsibility! Never was! So why was I back here again? Why did I always find myself back beside him?!