I Should Have Known Better

Chapter II - The Next Phase

Then one day I was browsing in a bookstore and a picture on a book cover of an old Chinese gentleman holding a stick caught my eye. It was simply titled Tai Chi. Sometimes as we walk along a path in life something happens that make us pause and reflect. Something told me to read this book. What intrigued me was the fact that the author was fifty years old (my age then) when he took up Tai Chi and he was 80 when he wrote the book and he was still going strong.

As Gracie Heavyhand from the Dead Dog Café used to say;

"Stay Calm, Be Brave, and Wait for the Signs"

We all get signs that tell us what direction we should go in, and if we are paying attention and aware we can use these times to great advantage. This was one such moment for me and I registered for a local Taoist Tai Chi course. It was a commitment of two hours twice a week for three months to learn the 108 moves. Every night for two hours we learned two new moves, and at the next session we reviewed the previous moves and learned two new ones. I found it very challenging as did most of the class, so much so that I had to practice a lot during the in-between days just to keep up.

But it did pay off, I persevered and about half way through the course I noticed that one of the new moves we were learning started to relieve my leg stiffness. I was so thankful and excited that I had stumbled upon and acted upon this magical thing, something that had demonstrated one of it's many benefits. I vowed then and there to keep up the practice, which I have done and still do into my eighties. Very gradually over many years the pain subsided and I eventually was able to walk and sit almost normally.

During my fifties, although I had given up running, I hadn't given up fitness, especially aerobic fitness. I could play squash, ride a stationary bike, and workout at the gym. For the herniated spinal disc problem that I had, there were two approaches that I knew of. One was injections in the disc to add fluid and expand the space between the lumbar vertebrae which would relieve the pressure on the sciatic nerve.

The other approach, which I took, was exercise. The idea being that with exercise fluid was absorbed in the disc with similar results to the injections. I would get on the stationary bike in terrible pain and when I had finished the workout it was much relieved. There was no cure, but there was temporary relief.

At that time my office building was across the street from my racquet club. And in order to play I had to book a squash court ahead and arrange a game with someone, which I did whenever I could. I also had a lot of meetings to attend which often went on much longer than scheduled. My job was perfect for me at that time. My department approved of suppliers and technologies for all of the Nortel corporation. So the meetings that I went to usually had to do with those suppliers or processes.

Quite often I had a conflict. The meeting was dragging on and my squash time was rapidly approaching. I would keep checking my watch and with ten minutes to go, I would announce, "sorry gentlemen, I have to go". And I would run across the street. No one ever asked where I had to go.

I never felt guilty because I was always the first one in the office in the mornings and often the last one to leave at night. And besides I was a great believer in the 80/20 rule which states that you achieve 80% of the objective in 20% of the time. Well I was at those meetings at least 80% of the time. So there.

During this time in my fifties, I travelled a lot, about once a month, and often for a week or two. We had a travel agent who we were supposed to book with and always did. But the prices that our company paid for flights and hotels were always on the high side. After all Nortel wouldn't want their representatives staying in sleazy places. It wouldn't present the right image. So what I did as well as some others, after I got my travel itinerary, I would change it for what I wanted. I always phoned the hotels to find out what fitness facilities they had; gyms and pools and such. The flights and times were changed also so that there was ample social and recreational time. (None of this getting in late at night and flying out the next afternoon.)

It all made for better relationships with suppliers if you can arrive in time to have supper with the people you are meeting, tour the plant and have meetings the next day, and sing Karaoke and drink sake at night. Then fly out the next day at a reasonable hour to the next destination. I always felt that the way to work most effectively with people was first to establish a good friendly relationship. We weren't adversaries, we were partners that could help each other develop and grow together. Getting to know you was the first step.

On one trip to Taiwan, when we checked into our hotel and saw the pool on the way to our rooms, I just dropped my bag in the room and went down for a swim. I just needed something to relieve the stiffness and brain fog of the long flight. There was only one other person in the pool and he told me that he flies often from America to Asia and the rep that meets him always takes him to a pool first thing. It was the best way to get over jet lag.

I found that keeping a focus on fitness, and hanging out in gyms and pools, was inspirational. One time in Japan our hotel had excellent hot and cold baths. I had been in many saunas, but wasn't sure how the Japanese conducted themselves in the hot baths. So I just went in and observed for awhile.

Lather with soap and scrub and rinse well a few times first outside the hot tub. Rinse by dumping water from a bucket over your head. So you are absolutely squeaky clean before you get in the clean shared tub. Very sensible and very Japanese. (Even the bath tubs in the hotel rooms had a stool and water bucket outside the tub so that you can clean well before getting in the tub.) Then enter the hot tub, which was very hot, for only a few minutes. Then go to the cold tub, which was very cold, but after the hot tub slipping into the cold there was no sensation until you started to chill and shiver. Then back to the hot tub.

I did this cycling from hot to cold to hot a few times and then I noticed a third tub of ice cold water. It actually had ice floating in it. So I got really steamed up and slipped into the ice cold. When I crawled out I was really quite relaxed as I stumbled into an adjoining room where they were giving shiatsu massages. This very strong large woman put me through the paces with her hands, feet and elbows. At one point she had me arched over her back. If all my meridians were not opened up by then, they never would be. Forty minutes later I was stretched out in a la-la land state along side all the other apparently sound asleep Japanese travellers. I asked myself, 'where are all those stressed out and up tight Japanese that I have heard so much about.

After Japan we went to Taiwan. When we finally arrived at our hotel I felt tired after all the Japanese hospitality; too much to eat and drink, too much Karaoke and late nights I guess. But I did spot a sauna in the building. Just what I needed, I thought. I know saunas. So in I go. The sauna was quite full. Men lined up on the bench, but I found a spot and joined them. Then an attendant comes in and put a stack of cold wet towels beside me. I had never seen this done before. Looking around I noticed the others putting them on their heads. Then I felt the top of my head getting very hot. So I followed suit and went through my stack quite quickly. The attendants kept bringing more stacks which were most welcome.

After a while I started feeling a bit light headed, so I made my way to the door where I was greeted by a masseur who guided me to a table and motioned that I should lie down. He had a wet towel wrapped around his arm and began scrubbing me very hard and then showing me how much dirt or skin or something that was coming off my body. He seemed much more impressed with the results than I was. After all of this I was not only much more relaxed, but much pinker as well.

Saunas or hot tubs and massages were a big part of travel for me. Staying calm and being relaxed helps us think clearer, be more effective in social situations, and aids in letting our bodies heal themselves.