Battle of the Celebrities
[Jacob vs Edward Part 2]
"Dude, what the hell?" Jacob asked as he lunged towards Edward.
"Hey, you're the one who always wanted a fight. I'm just giving it to you." Edward skillfully dogged the attack.
Eddy clearly had the upper hand here, seeing as he was a creeper and could read minds. Never could give anyone any privacy...
"Ugh, what is it this time?" Bella asked right before she tripped and knocked herself out. When she came to, Eddy was hovering above her -like the creeper he is-
"Hey love, are you ok?" He asked in his weird pedophile accent. (Referring to the first movie. His American accent = wtf?)
"Yeah, I'm wonderful! ....Unless you're thinking about leaving again. You're not right?!" Bella started to hyperventilate.
"No love. I was just settling something with the mutt." Eddy reassured Bella.
"I. AM. NOT. A. MUTT!" Jacob yelled from his spot on the cliff.
"You smell like one." Eddy retorted, getting up from his spot near Bella.
"At least I don't sparkle! What the fuck are you?! A fairy?" Jacob shot back.
"No. I'm a vampire." Eddy replied with a 'duhhh' tone. "And at least I'm not a pedophile. I'm not in love with a baby."
"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? You're a hundred years old! And Bella's eighteen. In what universe is that not pedophilism?"
"I'm not the one that was in love with a girl, and when she didn't love me back, I went after her daughter. Mutt!" Eddy yelled at Jacob furiously.
"HOW MANY TIMES DO I NEED TO TELL YOU I AM NOT A MUTT?! Leech!" Jacob roared.
"I'd rather be a leech then a mutt!" Eddy shot back.
"At least this mutt is hotter then you. I thought you were supposed to be a god, all smexy and stuff. Yeah...I don't see anything special about you. You're actually kind of ugly. I'm sooooo much cuter than you."
"At least I got the girl you were after for three books!" Eddy shot his tongue out at Jacob.
"You know what? Let's settle this like men!" Jacob paused and took a deep breathe. Everyone around stopped breathing, waiting to see what would happen next.
....................
"PUPPYYYY POWERRRR!" Jacob yelled, before turning into..... an adorable puppy? Wait...what? I thought.....nevermind.
"Aw, Jacob, you're so cute." Bella cooed, before tripping, once again, and falling on a sharp rock. Causing her to looser her arm. Edward watched as it rolled and started to fall off the cliff, before he dived after it.
Sadly, Eddy didn't make it in time. Bella's arm rolled off the cliff, never to be seen again.
Eddy stood up and everyone looked to see his expression.
His whole face was twitching, along with his body, "Must. Have. Blood!" Edward continued to twitch.
Jacob took this advantage to start gnawing at Eddy's ankles.
"AHH!" Eddy started to freak out, and hop backwards.
In the process, Eddy wasn't aware of Bella still lying on the ground behind him, and he tripped over her.
Causing him to fall of the cliff.
"AHHHH!" Both Eddy and Bella were screaming.
"NO! You can't leave me again." Bella was hyperventilating.
Jacob tilted his head in confusion as Bella ran towards the edge of the cliff and jumped off.
/Oh well.../ He thought as he turned around, picked up his purse, and started to walk away.
All of a sudden he was hit by a bus and flattened, like a pancake.
Jacob was too preoccupied, thinking about Renesmee, to notice the truck coming his way. He couldn't even hear it honking.
Now it was too late, and he was dead.
They all were...
Even his puppy powers couldn't save him....):
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Lol, alright, VOTE/COMMENT/FAN :D
I feel like this one wasn't as funny as Bieber vs cyrus but eh, there were a few funny parts(x
Anyways, tell me what other celebs youd like to see duel it out, and maybe it'll happen(; (I promise to think of more creative ways for this to end and maybe create a new fighting site, instead of the cliff lol)
And yeah, don't forget to vote and comment. Even tell you're friends/fans about it(;
lol
