How To Love The Casanova?

HTLTC-1- His Past-

Chapter 1

*Pain demands to be felt*

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"Luke, I love you so much.... but I think... I think it's time to end this something between us" she said stammering and can't even look straight into my eyes.

At first I was numb then it stings me sraight into my heart one time big time. It fucking hurts. Damn it! How could she?! I love her that much but now all she ever wanted was to end that something between us. Just great.

It's so fucking ironic and somewhat unexplainable that she wanted to end that something betweeen us when all along we don't really had started a love story of us. Yes, she's ending something that never started in the first place, amazing right? Could that be possible?

I managed to stay serene despite the possibility that within a minute I might kill myself because of this pain.

I cupped her face. "No you can't. We never started something so don't end something like this!" I retorted trying to sound strong but feeble inside. I just can't contain this pain anymore. Out of the blue, tears started to fall from my eyes, shit! It sucks. This is the first time I cried for a girl that losing her is a total suicide.

Sheshrugged and then removed my hands, instead she placed it in between hers.

"I do really love you luke. It's just that our love is out of nowhere, it's quite unevitable. I'm just gonna fix things Luke. Then when everything's okay, I'll come back to you, I promise." she said while sobbing. I know she's hurt too. BUT I'm also suffocating with so much pain. Im this usual serious boy but in the end I ended up getting hurt and torn apart. And I dont find any reason or way how to mend this heart.

Slowly and slowly, she loosen the grip at my hands and then turned her back on me saying "luke, Im sorry but I love you" then she started to walk away from me. Damn it! I can't even manage to move. This is the most painful scene I ever known. Watching the one you love the most............. leving you little by litte. </3

Every step she made just makes me weaker and weaker. I can' barely breathe. But finally I managed to utter some words "Once a person walks away... there is no way for them to come back anymore" i said  hoping she'll retreat . True Enough, Im hoping shell come back to me and then I'm willing to embrace her.

But she didnt respond, instead she continued walking until I cant see her anymore and since that moment I promise myself not to love again that people will hurt you and just leave you in the end.

Up to now, I dont even know where the hell is she and what the fuck that I have to suffer like this? Really I don't get the logic of love.

Aleisha Mcdonough.. I loved you that much but Im not that stupid to keep loving you when all along you gave up instead of holding on. I learned my lesson now. Maybe.. Maybe time will heal all the wounds and the scars she left in my heart. I do 

"I can contradict my feelings just to make sure I wont look stupid" I keep on reminding that to myself hoping one day when I woke up, I'll forget everything. All the pain and the painful memories that keeps on lingering on me. Yet it really seems that it takes time to finally recover from the past. I really needed time to recover from my past. I don't want to overstress myself and hoping that one day we will still end up together. If we are really destined to be forever, paradoxically speaking, she, in the first place shouldn't have leave me. If she'll come back one day, it will take her time also to have me back.

--

"Luke, are you ready?" My mom asked me. I smiled and nodded as my response.

And now finally, after a year of intoxicating myself from panging pain and suffocating with the repercussions and hatred.............. Good thing, I already moved on. But to say to you, it's not really that easy to forget someone you loved before and gave you so much things and memories tom remember. There's no easy way if you don't really want to do such. Yes, I admit, forgetting Aleisha have not occur at my mind back then but thanks to my friends they helped me realize that I am worthy too and needed myself to be free from ant heartaches, otherwise I'll be called The man Who Can't Be Moved. But whatever I say about forgetting someone. In my heart, she left a big place in me that i think no one will never ever take away or replace. The art of letting go sucks, too.

Hooray! celebrate for this. I already surrender myself with the reality of love.. of life that we should live life to the fullest and forget the fucking past and just live withe the present timeline. Whay's past is past. Really it takes time to heal and mend a wounded heart after being broke and stabbed a million times.

Im now ready to face the world.. to live a new life.. No more heart connected issues. But one thing is for sure, I've changed unintentionally. Yes I did change. It sucks at first but then I realized that's the aftermath of the past and the least thing we could do is to accept it and I know it's for the better.

"Okay, lets go Luke" Mom retorted in between my reverie. I'm leaving Australia for good and be heading to Philippines to start something new..

Lukes note: [ Be ready there girls cause Im gonna make you drool over me hahahaha ]

"Okay mom" I said and finally the plane door is closing as I closed my heart for loving again.

AN; English to kasi nasa Australia sila pero all in all Taglish tong story hahaha. VOTE COMMENT AND BE A FAN. Kasi naman haha.