To Love Is To Destroy. (The Mortal Insterments Fan-fic)( Slow Updates)

New beginning.

Jace'sPOV***

"What have I done? What have I done?" I ask myself as I stuff my face into my warm callused hands. I cheated on her. My one true love is gone. The look on her face when she went through the portal is repeating over and over again in my mind.

'Isabelle is going to kill me.' I think to myself. I made her best friend, my girlfriend, leave. Broken. She looked so destroyed... I can't get her look of hurt and betrayal. out of my head. ' She never would have found out if she actually went to Idris as planned.' A voice inside me head tells me. 'I mean you were cheating on her with that chick for what? Three months? Four?'

"Shut up." I say out loud to my surprise. Great, just grand. Now im talking to myself. Just fan-freaking-tastic. Im going f@cking crazy.

There was a loud knock on the door. I sigh. And this is the part where I die. "Come in." I say with my hands muffling my voice as Isabelle walks in.

"Where in the hell is Clary?" She comes in with her like 7 inch heels clinking on the floor, with hands firmly placed on her hips, and it looks like she could, no would, kill me if I say the wrong thing. Cause if looks could kill. I'd be 10 feet under by now.

I don't say anything to her, because i have nothing to say that will justify what i have done. Just sit there with my head in my hands. She stalks over to me. "I'll ask you again. Where. In. The. Hell. Is. Clary?" She said raising her voice with every word she spits out of her mouth, as if it was poison in her mouth.

"Sh.. She's gone." I whisper, mostly to myself still not being able to believe it happened. I'm such an idiot. So stupid. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot!

"She's what?!?" She screamed. "By the Angel Jace, What the f@ck did you do?!"

"I....I." She cuts me off, with a raise of her hand, when she sees a piece of paper that has her name written hastily on it. She rips it off the bed, and begins to read it to her self.

"You didn't." She gasps. "You cheating, lieing piece of sh!t bastered!!" She shrieks as her expression turns dark. "I'd kill you, but I think Clary being gone will kill you before I do." She turns around to leave but stops suddenly in her tracks. " Its was her birthday you know. She was going to surprise you. Well I hope you're happy with yourself." She says slamming the door behind her.

Happy? How will I ever be happy again? My Clary is gone and its all my fault. My fault.

Clary'sPOV****

He cheated on me. No thought crossed his mind. No suprise there he never was smart enough to have reasonable thoughts anyway.

I get up on my elbows, finding myself to be on the grass of a huge lawn that is neat and perfectly cut. Dame you rich people. I think to myself. There it is. The California institute. I think as I get up to knock on the door.

I brush off any traces of grass or dirt that may have made its way onto my clothes. Feeling a little self conscious of myself, I quickIy whip my face and try and get away all traces that lead to that I had tears on my face. I grab my suitcase and head to the door with a confident stride. I suck in a huge breath just as I knock on the bulbous door.

A girl about my age opens the door. She squeals when she sees me so I'm taken by suprise just from that alone. "Umm. Hi I'm Clary Fairchild and I was wondering if I could stay here?" I ask like it isn't obvious with my luggage and everything.

She squeals again, once again, catching me off guard and grabs my arm as she drags me into the institute. "Of course. Of course. Of course!!" She yelps excitedly as she stops for a second. "By the way I'm Amy Starkweather. I'm sorry I seem a bit over the top, but I have never had a girl shadowhunter around here in forever. Come on you need to meet the family and then we can find you a room." She says, dragging me down the hall. I go, because refusing to will just tire me out more than i already am. She reminds me a little of Izzy, but then again she doesn't. Does that even make sense?

Amy opens a door to a huge library. Bigger then the one at the New York institute. My mouth falls open, but I quickly close it when I see and group of people staring at me. I smile awkwardly.

Amy does all the talking. "Mom, dad, this is Clary Fairchild. She was wondering if she could stay her for awhile?"

Her mom smiles. Or who I'm guessing is her mom. She has blonde hair that is shoulder length, blue eyes that suck you in and a slim figure. Next to her is a man, he has brown hair, hazel eyes and a warm smile. "Of course. We would never, not take in a shadowhunter in need of help. Hello Clary my name is Lucinda, this I my husband James," She gestures to the brunette." My three sons, Jake," she points to a blond boy with Hazel eyes, he looks to be about nine. "Nate." She gestures to a blonde guy my age, with blue eyes, muscular and tall figure. Kinda cute. 'Stop that Clary! You just got your heart broken and you are already checking out other guys? Jez.' "And Chris." Then I see him, he has brown hair, he's Buff, super buff, super tall. And is hot. 'Stop that Clary.' I wince to myself.

I politly smile at them. "and you have already meet Amy, so Amy how bout you help Clary with her bags and get her a room." She says with sweet and innocent eyes. Amys says an 'ok' and we head out. I wave to the Starkweather's and follow her down the hall. 'This is my new home. I'm going to like it here.' I tell myself.

Amy opens a door to an empty room. With a bed, dresser, and closet. " Thanks, for everything." I say walking in.

"No problem, and I'm just down the hall if you need me." She says closing the door. Once i hear the fading away of Amy's footsteps, I let it all out it all out.

Once I have shed my last tear I promise to never shed one more ever again over that piece of shit Jace. And that is a promise I'm willing to keep.

A/N*** How am I doing?

Comment any ideas you have.