Sad, Beautiful, Tragic

Chapter Two

TRIGGER WARNING: SELF HARM AND EATING DISORDERS ARE PRESENT IN THIS CHAPTER
Harry's POV
A few weeks later...
The bond between Louis and I has grown stronger than ever over only the few weeks that I've known him. I knew him better then I knew Gemma, which I didn't think was possible because we're so close.
It's Saturday and we're currently sitting on my living room couch, watching some film about lions. The Lion King I think it's called? I don't know, Louis insisted we watch it. My mum is all the way in the states for some new fashion line she's working on, nothing new. I honestly don't know where Gemma is though, she says she was going out to see some friends but I hardly believe that, she's probably with her secret boyfriend or something.
I look over at Louis and see that he keeps looking from the tv to the popcorn bowl I'm eating out of, obviously resisting.
Over the short time I've known him I've learned things about him that even he fails to tell me. I've noticed that I've only seen him eat twice and it was a very little amount of food which scares me. I know he gets bullied often and is afraid to stick up for himself so I do it for him, I don't mind. It makes me feel like I'm doing something right. And I'm pretty sure he has a crush on me, I didn't just guess that one, Gemma thinks so too and Gemma knows what she's talking about.
I look over at Louis again and see that he's still resisting the popcorn.
"It's not gonna bite you Lou." I say with a laugh.
He looks over at me with a smile but his eyes tell me he's lying. "I'm alright, not very hungry today."
"Lou please just eat some." I say, pleading.
"I told you I'm not hungry." He says looking back at the film.
I move the popcorn from in between us and set it on his lap, scooting closer to him. I lean my head into the crook of his neck.
"You know you want some." I tease, hoping he'll eat.
"Harry please just-"
"It's yummy..." I cut him off.
He suddenly becomes really angry and throws the popcorn bowl off his lap, causing the buttery snack to fly everywhere. "I said no Harry!" He yells. Without saying anything else he runs off into the bathroom.
I begin to pick up the mess until I hear puking. I scurry off towards the bathroom.
I try to open the door but it's locked. "Louis open up please." I plead but the noise continues. I knock louder, calling his name, begging for him to open the door. Then I realize that he's making himself throw up, he's bulimic. I quickly knock down the door and run over to him. He's sitting next to the toilet with his hand in his mouth, forcing himself to puke up the crisps we ate earlier.
"No Lou!" I yell, pulling his hands behind his back.
"Let me go Harry!" He yells through tears.
"No Lou. You can't do this to yourself." I say, through my own tears.
"Yes I can! You don't understand! You're perfect Hazza, you don't have anything wrong with you. I'm just a fat, stupid, freak." He weeps.
"No Lou, I use to do this too but I'm better now. You're so beautiful." I say, letting go of his hands and bringing him into my lap, allowing myself to lean against the cold bathroom wall.
He cried even harder while I rocked him back and forth like a mother to a crying infant.
"You're so beautiful Lou." I coo into his ear.
He slowly stopped crying after a few minutes and he looked up at me with broken, blue eyes.
"Why did you hurt yourself Hazza?" He questioned.
"The same reason you do, we want to be perfect."
Without replying he rested his head in the crook of my neck and left a gentle kiss to my collar bone.
"I think you're beautiful too Haz." He said after a long silence.
I looked down at the broken boy below me "I love you." I say without thinking. But there was no thoughts about it, I loved Louis from the day I met him, I know I've only known him for about a month and I'm probably crazy but I do love him.
"I love you too Hazza." He spoke softly while I gently kissed the top of his head.
I felt a warm grin spread across my face and began to play with his hair, I'm never questioning Gemma ever again.
"Do you want to nap in my bed? I'm really uncomfortable." I said with a chuckle.
Louis responded by standing up from my lap and gesturing a hand to help me up, I took it and used what little weight he had to pull myself up, almost pulling him down with me.
"Jesus you're small Lou." I said worriedly.
He shook his head and started towards my room. When we arrived in the navy blue covered space I crawled into the warm bed and patted the space next to me, gesturing for Lou to crawl in next to me.
He hopped onto the bed and curled up in the blankets next to me. Our noses were almost touching and I could feel his warm breath hitting my face, causing me goose bumps.
I rubbed small circles on his hip until I felt a rough patch of skin underneath my own smooth skin. Lou winced in pain and I knew what it was, I knew it all too well. ((lol sorry, had to add some Taylor Swift because I love her sooooo much))
I pulled the blankets off of his torso and when I tried pulling up his shirt he stopped me by tugging it back down roughly.
"Hazza, please don't." He said with pleading eyes. "I don't want you to see."
I ignored him and pulled his shirt up anyways to see old scars and new scabs. Not only was my little LouBear starving himself but he was also cutting.
His eyes began to well up with tears but I caught them with my fingers, my eyes beginning to fill with tears.
"I'm sorry." He whispered, his voice cracking.
"No, I'm sorry I didn't help sooner." I said getting up and heading towards my bathroom.
"Hazza?" Lou called.
He continued to call my name while I grabbed the ointment my doctor prescribed for me for my own cuts a while back when I was like Lou. I walked back into my room and twisted the cap off of the ointment. I sat on the bed and spread some of the cream on my finger.
"What's that?" Louis asked with a worried look.
"They're probably infected." I said gesturing towards his cuts.
"Don't worry about me Hazza." He spoke softly.
"This is gonna sting a bit." I say, ignoring him.
"Okay." He said, taking in a deep breathe.
I gently placed my ointment covered fingers on his skin, rubbing it into the cuts that were scabbed over. He winced in pain and grabbed my free hand, squeezing it harder then I expected.
After a few minutes I had covered all of his visible cuts and we were back to laying down in my bed.
His back was pressed against my chest so I was spooning him and my arms draped over his thin torso.
"LouBear?" I asked.
"Mhm?" He mumbled, half asleep.
"Promise me you'll never hurt yourself again?" I asked.
"Yes." He mumbled back.
I snuggled my head onto his shoulder and kissed up his neck and jawline.
"Good." I said, still lightly kissing him.

A Month Later...
Yesterday was the last day of school and me and Lou planned on spending our first day of summer together. When he knocked on my door his hands were full of old Disney films, board games and a bunch of other stuff.
"What's all this?" I ask, taking some of the stuff from him and moving out of the way for him to step in.
"I don't know, usually when I come over we never have much to do so I brought some stuff." He said with a laugh.
"Okay cool, but I'm taking you somewhere tonight." I replied.
Lou opened his mouth to talk but before any noise came out Gemma came into the room.
"Hey guys, I'm bored. Can we do something?" She said, a little too enthusiastically.
"Sure." Louis replies simply.
"Okay so what're we doing?" I asked.
"Hmm..." She mumbled, in thought. "How about truth or dare?" She said excitedly.
Me and Louis looked at each other and nodded.
"Okay I'll be back." She said, running back up to her room.
Me and Louis set his stuff on the dining room table and when Gemma came back down she was holding a purple flashlight.
We sat in a make shift circle in the middle of the game room of our basement and turned off all the lights.
"Who goes first?" I asked.
"I will cause I'm the oldest." Gemma stated. She spun the flashlight in a circle on the floor and when it stopped it pointed at me.
"Oh great." I mumbled to myself.
"Harry, truth or dare?" She spoke with an evil grin on her face.
I knew this was going to be embarrassing either way so I chose the seeming less harmful one.
"Truth."
"Playing it safe I see, smart kid. Okay so, who's your crush?" Gemma spoke. I knew she was trying to set me and Lou up, she already knew I liked him. Lou looked up at me with hopeful eyes.
"Louis." I said, my cheeks turning red.
"Oh don't be a wimp. We all, already knew that." Gemma said back. I looked at Louis and he was smiling his beautiful smile.
"I'm so getting you back." I said, spinning the flashlight. When it stopped it pointed at Louis and he gave me a look that said, "don't you dare embarrass me in front of your sister."
"Truth or dare?" I asked the blue eyed boy.
"Dare." He said with a smirk on his face.
"I dare you to let Gemma do any make up she wants on you." I replied, sticking my tongue out.
Louis looked at Gemma and his face completely flushed of its color.
"I'll be back with my makeup bag!" Gemma called, already halfway up the stairs.
"I hate you." Louis mumbled while Gemma was gone.
"You love me." I said with a cheeky grin plastered to my face.
"Come here Louis!" Gemma called from the dining room.
Louis sighed and pulled himself off of the hardwood floor, giving me an unforgiving glance on his way up the stairs.
After a few minutes Gemma and Louis came down and he looked absolutely ridiculous and adorable at the same time. Gemma wrote "I Love Hazza" all over his face with different materials. Some of it was eyeliner and some was eye shadow, there was also lipstick and lip liner all over.
"Oh god is it bad?" Louis asked with a horrified look on his face while me and Gemma were laughing.
"See for yourself." Gemma said, holding back a laugh and pulling out her phone camera. Louis looked on the screen and his face immediately heated up.
"Gemma!" He yelled, slapping my sister playfully on the arm. As well as my relationship with Louis growing he also became good friends with my sister which was at first, a little awkward but now it's cool and we all love hanging out together.
Hours later, after a few games of twister and a movie break, it was finally time for Louis' surprise.