Dinner-Monolague

Dinner

"You're fat and ugly," The voice just kept saying that over and over again. I tried not to cry but I could feel the lump in my throat growing by the second. It started to feel more like an Apple than what previously felt like a perogie.

It was the worst timing, too.

I was out at dinner with my mom at Olive Garden when I looked at the menu and all I could see where the things that I couldn't eat.

I had already ordered water instead of the usual Dr. Pepper. If I ordered something out of the ordinary, my mom would begin to question me. I'm too scared to be confronted about this so I ordered shrimp Alfredo. I barely touched it.

"You're being rude by not eating it! And talk to your mother! She's so worried! How do you feel knowing that you make your mother cry?!"

That's all I heard-complaints from myself about myself. I couldn't wait to get home so I can let it all out.

"You're a mess! Do you know how expensive that meal was and you didn't touch it!"

That's all I could hear even though I was in a crowded restraunt. I felt the Apple begin to grow more and I could feel water pushing at the back of my eyes. I hope my mom couldn't tell through my glasses.

"I'm gonna go to the restroom." I confirmed to my mother. I had an escape, all I have to do is give myself a pep talk and.... ask for a box.... for my food..... that's serious. I can't talk to people! I started to hear a different voice, a more confident and bubbley voice. It told me that I was beautiful. The Apple began shrinking and softening from my neck. It said that my mom would ask for the box for me. My throat went back to a soft perogie. It strengthened me. I liked that voice. It never came around much.

I left the sweet silent calmness of the restroom and went back to my mom at the table.

The waiter came back with a smile and said "Would you ladies like the check?" My mother kindly agreed and before he left I pepped myself up for this. "Can I get a box, too?" I did it! I didn't stutter! I didn't choke! I did it! By now the Apple had completely disappeared.

I was happy again. I enjoyed the ride home from Olive Garden. It was a small victory but anything helps. I smiled for the rest of the day.

Then I had school in the morning. How can I get over that excuse for a hidden rollercoaster ride in life? I'll find a way. There are restrooms there, too. I can always just go there.