Chapter 35-
Makinseys Pov-
"I'm back with the results." The doctor enetered the room, and I suddenly got very nervous. Chaz couldn't be here because he doesn't no about my past relationship with Justin. Justin is here, but I told him to wait outside. I don't want to see him right now. I'm still very mad at him about yesterday. My heart wants it to be Justin as crazy as that sounds, but my head says Chaz. Chaz would be a better father. Mostly because me, and him are already together. Me, and Justin arn't. That may not seem so bad to others, but to this baby......it would be a total other story. If it's Justin's.......well I don't really no. In this situation, at this moment...I really don't know what I'm going to do. I wish I did, but sadly I don't even have a clue. I'm not even ready to have a baby, less likely push me, and Chaz's relationship farther. If Chaz asked me to marry him today, my exact words would be, "No.". It sounds mean, but I'm not ready. What if this child is Justin's? Ugh life is so complicated. I took the paper from the doctor's hand, and walked out. I really don't want to look at the results right now. I'm so scared it's not funny. I seen Justin behind me, jog over to me with a smile bigger than Texas on his face. What's with him. This isn't a time to be happy.
"So?" He rubbed his hands together, as if he was expecting it to be his.
"I don't want to look at it." I throw the paper behind into a mud puddle, and ran to my car. I seen Justin run to the paper threw my rear-view mirror while I backed out. I started out of the parking lot, but I turned back one time to see Justin. He had his face open with shock, but I couldn't tell if the shock came from him being the father, or that Chaz was. I rammed the gas, and went down the highway. I was so mad, but so sad at the same time. I turned on the radio listening to Carrie Underwood, and swerved onto a back road that I used to go on. I traveled down the road until I found the spot. When I was heading to college a few months back I found it. It's the best place for me to go when I'm trying to work things out in my mind, or when I want to relax, and right now I think both would be nice. I need to figure all this out before I head back to see who's the father of my child. I'm sure Chaz will freak, but Justin will explain. He always does. I got out of my car, and walked through the splashy mud-puddles getting to the other side which was beautiful. It had trees above a clear, blue pond. I sometimes see swan here also. I can understand why they come here. It's beautiful. The last time I came here I brought a swing, and tied it to the tree, so that I could swing across the water. Everytime I do, I feel like a little girl again. Like I was worth something. Something more than a teenage-mom. I walked over to the tree swing, and sat down. I looked up at the clouds, and felt a drop fall softly on my face. I seen little rain drops hit the water making circles all throught the water. Like little ripples that floated out. I smiled, and swung back, and forth through the rain. It's so peaceful out here. I can think, imagine, and let loose. I close my eyes, and lean my head back, just swinging back, and forth across the pond. When Summer comes, there's no doubt that I'm gonna jump into that water from here. Maybe by the summer time....my life will be better. Maybe even complete.
Dream:
"Justin?" I hum out.
"What?" He turns around with a happy smile on his face. The sun made it better. The sun rays went through his hair making it a light blonde, and it made his eyes look so honest, and pure. I was leaning aginst a tree, just looking at him. There's not one thing that's wrong with him. He's flawless, and I wish he understood that. Every girl's dream is to be flawless, perfect, and beautiful, and I know I'm not, but when I'm around Justin I feel like I am.
I turn my head in the direction of the clouds, and seen the sun slowly drifting down below the hill. I felt Justin's hands settle on my stomach, and I look down with a smile. My baby, our baby will soon be born into our arms. I look up, and Justin's eyes mix into mine. It's like I'm in a whole other world except it's just me, and him. Nobody else.
"Makinsey...I-I-
Dream Over:
I felt myself being shooken. I open my eyes, and see Justin.
"Hmm?" I mumble. I finally realize that I had fallen asleep, but how? I was on the swing.....
"Makinsey....come on. We need to get home." He looks away. What's wrong with him? Why can't he look me in the eye.
"Justin are you ok?" I ask sitting up next to him.
"Yea..." He drifts off, and I suddenly rememeber why I came here. I grumbled, and Justin glanced over.
"You wanna know?" He questions. He seemed to hide his emotions, but even I could tell there was some fustration behind that sentence.
"Not right now." I put my head in my hands, and let small tears fall out.
"Justin....I just want to get this off my chest before I find out the father. Ok?"
He nods, and I start.
"To be honest....I always wished having a future life with you....and I dreamed about it alot, but I think they were meant to be in my dreams for another reason. There called dreams for a reason, and some dreams never some true. So before I find out....I want to let you know...If your the father..." I stop, and look away. " If your the father...I would probally be just as happy, and if it's Chaz's child then so be it. God has the future planned, and whatever I find out....is how it's supposed to be. No matter who it is. Ok?" I look over at him, and he just nods. I get up, and Justin remains there. I hear him mumble something, and I stop, but then continue walking. He probally didn't want me to hear anyway.
I got in my car, and started down the road. Justin had his own car. He can get home without me. I soon afterward heard a car behind me, and seen Justin behind me.
********
I got home, and started my way to the door, and I seen Justin get out except this time, he walked the other way. He began walking down the road, and after a while I couldn't see him. I opened the door, and it was silent. Chaz, and Ryan must have gone out. I'm not sure where Caitlin is. I scanned the room looking for only one thing in-particular. I heard someone behind me, and I turned around to see Caitlin holding my results.
"Looking for this?" She says crossing her arms. By the looks of her face.......I already knew who the father was.
