He Use To Be A Son Of Anarchy

Epilogue

It was torture replying our last words to each other in my mind. I hated how it ended between us. I hated that we had something that felt so good and yet every fibre inside me told me that it was all just a bad idea from the beginning.

Georgeville looked so small from this distance. One thing I knew for sure: I wasn't staying here. The memories were too much to bear; the good ones and the bad ones. Staying in this armpit of a town would ruin me. So I knew I had to leave.

But where I'm going is what bothered me the most. Do I move on with my life? Do I start over fresh? Do I leave all of this to always just be a memory? Or do I go after the man I love? Do I make the ultimate sacrifice – normality - to chase a man that had become my whole world in such a short amount of time.

I thought looking back on it all would give me clarity. But instead I just arose from my memories even more confused than I was before. I, however, did have one more place to go before I could come up with a clear answer as to what's next.

I descended from the hill and got into my car. I drove more than a couple of hundred miles, but I barely noticed it. My mind was too busy trying to sort through my memories.

I pulled onto a dirt road that led to a ranch of some sorts.

I got out of the car and slowly walked to a wooden fence. I crossed my arms over it, looking at the scene that was unfolding in front of me.

A little boy was riding a horse. Next to him was a beautiful woman with curly blonde hair. She spotted me and they made their way to where I was standing.

"Hi, I'm Wendy. Can I help you?" she asked carefully.

I smiled politely. "I just love to look at the horses. I'm thinking about getting some riding lessons for my little sister," I lie.

Wendy nods and smiles. "Let us know if you're interested. We also have a program especially for kids with special needs."

"Thanks," I say and step back from the fence, "I'll think about it."

Wendy nodded in a polite manner and led the horse and the boy away from the fence. I turned away and headed back to my car.

"Come on Abel," I heard her say, "Let's get you inside."

Suddenly I felt absolute clarity. I am just like Tara in a sense, as much as I hated to admit it. I don't crave normality, but something else that was similar. I wanted to be in control of my own future and I realised that if I were to have run off with Jax when I wanted to I wouldn't have been able to pursue the things I've always wanted to.

Jax was right. I had dreams to chase. But I had to admit, if Jax was to cross my path again then I'd take it as a sign that we were meant to be together. Silently I hoped for this; another chance to be with him. But I couldn't be running after a man who still had so much healing to do. I keep hoping that he'll find me some day and finally realise that he deserves to be happy too. And if he comes back to me, I'd welcome him with open arms.

But I also planned on fulfilling all my dreams, even if it meant taken the long road. Let's face it, I haven't been known to take the conventional road.

I gently ran my hand over the bump that was starting to form on my belly. This was the perfect example of just how unconventional I was.

"We're going to be just fine, little dude," I said.

And so I knew that even if Jax Teller never returned, I'd have something to remind me of the love we once had. And if he did, well, I just hope that he won't be mad that I didn't tell him sooner.