The Dead of Night

Chapter Twenty

Chapter 20: Broken Walls.

The green canopy of trees hung over me, shielding my tiny frame from the light drizzle that had started falling. My heart pounded in my chest and I trembled as I stood in the face of my past. Feeling small and insignificant in its presence, I glared up at the massive home, which held so many memories.

I peeked over my shoulder and saw Eric, leaning against his car, still looking worried. It had been his idea to come up here, and, like the masochist I was, I had agreed. Some part of me believed him when he said this would help me move on. Maybe he was right, but it all came down to the question: did I want to move on?

With a hesitant sigh, I took a step forward, bringing me closer to my past than I had been in the past two months. Each step I took filled me with excitement and dread; what was I going to find? Would I see anything that I didn't wish to see? The questions were endless, while the number of steps it would take to carry me into the Cullens' home were limited.

I climbed the stairs, feeling my body weigh down with all the memories that were resurfacing, and before long, I was facing the ornate wooden door that led to the inside of my previous world. With one more look back at Eric, I sighed, and touched the doorknob. I was deeply surprised to find that it was open; I didn't think the Cullens would leave their possessions so unguarded while they were away. Then again, if any criminals did try to break in, Alice would see them. My brow knit heavily as I thought of the smallest Cullen; was she watching Eric and I right now?

 

Probably not. If she had been watching, then she must not be interested. I pushed the door open and immediately grasped the threshold paneling. My heart thudded so hard I could hear it in my ears, and my breath quickened exponentially. My eyes raked over everything that I saw, afraid that the tiniest detail would vanish with time.

Everything was just like I remember it.

The front room, where Edward and I had celebrated my birthday with the others, was just like it was a few months ago. The furniture was covered with delicate white sheets, to prevent dust, and the walls were bare. The normal family pictures and heirlooms were nowhere to be seen, probably locked away in storage somewhere.

My eyes watered up as I moved through the room, and, in the corner, I spotted a strange silhouette under a black cloth. I ripped the covering away, anxious to see what I hoped was not there, and stumbled backwards, chest heaving. Underneath the tarp was a brand new piano, just like the one Jasper had crushed after Edward kept him from attacking me.

Like the piano, I was replaceable.

My face fell a little and I moved away from the giant musical instrument, not wanting to dwell on my inadequacies any further. I found myself traveling upstairs, letting my hands trail over the walls that used to be covered with portraits. The three story house had so many areas that I had yet to truly explore, and, as painful as it was going to be, I planned to do just that.

The first door I came to was one I had only been in a handful of times; Carlisle and Esme's room. I opened the door and smiled, feeling a little closer to them as I moved through the space. The walls were a dark tinted, perhaps cherry wood or mahogany, and were littered with books. Every wall seemed to be a bookshelf of some kind. In the far corner, I noticed a small chess board, which I had seen downstairs on previous occasions.